Severus sat at the large library table with stacks of parchments and books piled around him. He sighed as he turned the page to July in his weekly planner and crossed out the first through the eighth. A week had passed since the disaster that was Black's memorial and still things had not returned to normal or as normal as it could with having a child that was undergoing cancer treatments.

Severus had expected the two-week break between rounds of chemo to be a bit of a break, but it was proving to be anything but. While Harry had snapped out of his extremely unresponsive state, Harry still wasn't himself. He continued to be withdrawn and speak only when spoken to. Severus had offered the chance to invite Miss Granger and Mr. Weasley over daily, but Harry turned down his offers. They had fallen into a routine and Harry adhered to it like he was on autopilot. Each morning Harry woke between nine and ten, ate as little as Severus allowed, and then worked on his summer homework until 12:30 when it was time for lunch. At one, Madam Pomfrey arrived for an hour of light psychical therapy, which was followed by an afternoon nap on either the sofa in the sitting room or the one in the library like today. Severus would wake him for dinner between five and six and Harry spent the evenings reading or staring into the fire until he excused himself around ten for bed.

The rouse of a schedule needed to stop. It was unhealthy and Severus hadn't the slightest clue of how to proceed. The child didn't want to talk except for the one incident when he demanded Severus to take Black's wand and destroy it. Severus had taken it, but rather than destroying it he sent it off to a jeweler that specialized in making keepsakes out of wands.

Miss Adamson visited daily and while she hadn't said it, Severus could tell by the look on her face that Harry's mental health was having an impact on his physical health. They had managed to reduce Harry's morphine intake by fifty percent, but they were having less luck with tapering him off TPN. In fact, instead of gaining weight, Harry had lost three pounds. And although Harry spent a lot of time sleeping, the child rarely slept for more than a few hours without waking from a nightmare.

The only good thing to come out of this last week was that Voldemort had been quiet. Too quiet. Severus was waiting for the fiery pain to shoot up his left arm or for Harry to scream bloody murder from another mental attack. The Order was stepping up the meetings to three times a week, though so far Severus hadn't attended once since the memorial. He couldn't leave Harry with anyone else right now, and the child refused to step foot in Grimmauld Place.

True to her promise, Minerva had stopped in for tea the day after the memorial, which had since morphed into daily lunch visits. As much as he hated to admit it, he had started looking forward to her visits if for nothing else than to have someone to carry a conversation with since talking to Harry was like talking to a brick wall.

A flash of motion snapped Severus out of his thoughts. He glanced over at the sofa to see the throw blanket lying on the floor that had been covering his child. Severus crossed the room and retrieved the blanket, laying it over Harry again before perching at the edge of a free space on the sofa. He set the back of his hand on his son's forehead, his temperature normal, before Harry rolled away from his touch.

"Go away," Harry mumbled, half-asleep.

"No. Sit up."

"I'm tired." He pulled the blanket over his head.

"You can sleep later." Severus tapped his son's knee. "Come on. Get up."

"Why can't you leave me alone?"

"I've left you alone long enough."

Harry sat up with a huff, his knobby knees poking out from red plaid pajama pants pulled up to his chest. "What do you want?"

"Harry," Severus paused, not knowing where to start. How did a parent breech the subject of seeing a psychiatrist to their child anyway? Out of all the books in Hogwarts' and his library, none of them dealt with adolescent psychology.

"If you don't have anything to say, I'd really like to get some sleep," Harry stated, his voice hard and cold.

"You've lost three pounds." Severus folded his hands in his lap.

"I can't help it," Harry yelled, "Everything tastes like cardboard and the smell of food makes me nauseous. It's not like I'm trying to lose weight. I look horrible already. Do you really think I want to look like a living skeleton?"

"I'm not blaming you for the weight loss."

"It sure as hell sounds like you are." Harry wrapped his arms around his legs.

"Language," Severus warned. This was not going well. Maybe he should've taken time to plan this conversation.

"What are you going to do? Take away my broom?" Harry's voice cracked. "Oh, wait, that's right. I can't fly anyway."

"Harry." Severus resisted comforting his child since his efforts would do more harm than good in Harry's worked up state.

"Why can't you leave me alone? I don't want this." Harry put his hand over the lump in his shirt that was his Hickman. "It's not worth it when Voldemort will kill me anyway."

Severus hissed. "Have you forgotten what I've told you? Voldemort is not your concern. Adults fight wars, not children."

"Try telling him that. He won't stop until I'm dead."

"Look at me," Severus cupped Harry's chin in his hand. His child's eyes were red and glassy from sleep deprivation. "I will not let the Dark Lord kill you."

Harry looked down and whispered, "It doesn't matter. He'll kill you, too."

"Pardon?" Severus asked without thinking. He had heard what Harry said, but his son's statement shocked him.

"Everyone dies. My parents, Sirius... I don't, I can't."

Severus fell back into the sofa as Harry practically tackled him in an effort to attach himself to Severus' side. He wrapped his arms around Harry, feeling the first tear drops fall from Harry's eyes since the memorial saturate and soak into his crisp white oxford.

"I won't leave you," Severus whispered, his arms tightening around his child. "We're safe here."

"You can't die on me," Harry begged.

"Shh," Severus hushed his son. He wouldn't make a promise he couldn't keep. Severus meant what he'd told Harry before. The Dark Lord would have to go through him to get to Harry.

Severus held Harry as all the tears that had been trapped inside Harry spilled out. He'd been waiting for this to happen. Harry couldn't push away his grief forever.

"I can't lose you. Not now," Harry cried against Severus' chest.

"Listen to me. We are in the safest place we can be. The Dark Lord fears the Headmaster and while he remains headmaster, the Dark Lord will not attack Hogwarts. The wards are stronger around Hogwarts than they have ever been and that does not include all the wards on our quarters. Once the new school year begins, there will be Aurors present in and around the castle at all times as well as Order members. If I ever felt that it was no longer safe here, we would be gone, possibly leave the country."

"But how? Wouldn't spies in the Ministry find the portkey records?" Harry wiped his nose on his sleeve.

Severus pulled a handkerchief out of his pocket and handed it to Harry before wandlessly cleaning Harry's sleeve. "The Ministry knows you as Harry Potter when that is not your legal name. No Ministry spy would think to look twice at Hadrian Prince, an American, leaving the country on a Muggle plane."

"I'm not American."

"Technically you have dual citizenship courtesy of your grandparents." Severus rubbed the back of Harry's neck.

"I don't understand."

"As I've told you before, I was born in the States, which gave me automatic citizenship. Even though you were born here, because I possess American citizenship, you were eligible for citizenship provided I exaggerated the amount of time I spent in the States as a teen."

Harry snorted. "No wonder Dumbledore wanted you as a spy if that's the way you thought at twenty."

Severus pulled Harry's beanie down over his eyes.

"Hey!" Harry's hand loosened its grip on Severus' shirt.

With a sound that resembled a chuckle, he pulled the beanie off Harry's head and set it beside them. "It seems my paranoia may pay off," Severus continued. "In the box your mother left us was the paperwork I had filed on your behalf including an American passport. I sent off paperwork this week to renew your passport."

Harry sighed. "Why can't Voldemort just kill himself?"

"That would be too easy." Severus looked at Harry's head. The child was rarely caught without a hat on outside of his bed. Sparse patches of short black hairs sticking straight up were scattered over his son's scalp.

"Stop looking at my head," Harry half-whined as his eyes traveled up to meet Severus' from his position leaning against Severus' side and chest.

"Why?" He traced the four-leaf clover birthmark with his finger. "I rather like being reminded of how lucky you are."

"I'm not lucky." Harry grabbed the black beanie, but resisted putting it on.

"It may not seem like it to you, but you are."

"Was there a reason you woke me?" Harry changed the subject as his body lost its tension and he relaxed into Severus' loosened hold.

"You're not going to like it." Severus frowned. He was having second thoughts on whether he should discuss the possibility of Harry seeing a psychiatrist after Harry's outburst.

"Try me. I've already yelled and cried. I can't react much worse," Harry paused. "I'm not in trouble for yelling at you, am I?"

"No. I'd rather you scream and cry than your behavior this past week, which is part of what I wanted to talk to you about."

Severus felt Harry's body tense up beside him.

"I ask that you let me finish before you give me your thoughts, alright?" Severus forced himself to stay calm and relaxed. If he were to tense up, Harry would pick up on that and the idea of a psychiatrist could wind up being a complete disaster.

"Okay."

"The way you've withdrawn this last week isn't healthy, mentally or physically, evidenced by the three pounds you've lost-"

"But," Harry interrupted.

"What did I saw about letting me finish?" Severus raised his eyebrow. "As I was saying, the way you're grieving is not healthy. A lot of things have changed in the past month and a half including my role in your life. I appreciate the times you have opened up about your childhood with your relatives, and I hope that continues. We're both new at this and while I've done what I think is best for you, I sometimes worry that it is not enough. When you withdraw like you have been, I don't know what to do but wait for you to snap out of it. You deserve better, Harry. I want you to be happy and healthy, physically and emotionally. I'd like you to learn better ways to cope and to have someone to talk to about things you're unsure or worried about when it comes to our relationship. I've been over it numerous times since the memorial and I'd really like you to consider seeing a psychiatrist."

"I'm not crazy." Harry tried to pull away, but Severus tightened his hold around his child.

"I didn't say you were."

"Psychiatrists are for crazy people. I'm not a freak! I'm not!"

"Harry," Severus warned, his voice stern.

His child curled his body into a tight ball.

"You are not a freak. Must I make you write that five hundred times or do you believe me?"

Harry shrugged.

Severus began rubbing circles into Harry's back. "You are a perfectly normal child, mentally, but sometimes everyone needs a little help. You... we are going through a major transition. It is normal to not know you feel or how to express your feelings. A psychiatrist could help assure you that everything you are feeling is normal and to help you find outlets for those feelings."

"I don't want to talk to anyone."

"Do you want to end up like me? Cold, distant and angry at the world?"

"You're not like that. At least not to me." Harry burrowed further into Severus' side as if to prove a point.

"You didn't know me after your mother died." The words slipped out of his mouth before his brain registered what he was saying. "There is a reason I have the reputation I have as a professor."

"Is this that important to you?" Harry looked up at him.

"Do you remember that I promised to help you live?" Severus countered.

Harry nodded.

"Then say yes to this."

His son gulped. "Okay, but you'll find a good one not some cracked up lady with her office decorated in pink cats, right?"

"Minerva gave me the name of a lady who specializes in children and teens. She also comes highly recommended from Miss Adamson, but of course I'll thoroughly interview her before you ever meet her. If I don't think she's right for you, I'll find someone else."

"Will she have to know I'm Harry Potter?"

"Her files will be under your legal name, but I think she needs to know you're Harry Potter if she's to help you. Besides, you should be able to discuss your concerns about the Dark Lord to her if you wish. Who knows, maybe she'll help you realize that there's more to you than Harry Potter."

Silence fell over the room that wasn't uncomfortable but wasn't absent of tension either.

"You're not just saying I'm not crazy, are you?" Harry asked a few moments later, his voice small and quiet.

"You have my word that I do not believe that you're crazy." Severus paused, giving Harry time for his words to sink in. "I believe there's an official looking envelope waiting for you on the table with your O.W.L. scores."

"Already?" Harry asked, his voice breaking as Severus saw the blood drain from his face.

"I assure you that you likely did better than you thought." He nudged Harry to stand up.

"You already opened it?" Harry stopped, a war between anger and shock playing out on his face.

"Isn't that part of what I'm supposed to do? Open your grade reports and test scores before you have a chance to change them?"

"But I don't... I mean... No one has bothered to care about my scores before." Severus saw Harry's lips turn up into a smile before being replaced with worry. "You're not going to make me review a subject and retest me yourself, are you? My scores can't be that bad."

"Like I said I believe you did better than you thought you would. If you wish to know more start walking." Severus smirked. "Although after dinner I do have a potions lesson for you to work on."

"Miss Adamson said no potions."

"Considering we'll be working in the kitchen with ingredients that are absolutely harmless even for Longbottom, I believe she would approve of the lesson." Severus set his hand on Harry's shoulder as they started to descend the library stairs, ready to catch his son if he slipped.

Harry groaned. "I knew you'd find a way around her restrictions."

"You may like the lesson."

"Like that'll ever happen. We both know I'm pants at Potions."

"We'll just have to change that, won't we?" With some one-on-one lessons Harry had more than enough potential to be passable at Potions if not more. Harry shared his blood. The child had to have some talent for Potions in him somewhere.

"Why can't you be the Defense professor?"

"I am. Well at least one of them." Severus laughed. Harry dug his hole deeper and deeper with each word out of his mouth.

"But I have to have Os to get into your classes."

"You forget I can make exceptions if I wish."

"Ugh."