The next day, after a rather peaceful night, with only a few hiccups along the way, Severus took Harry down to the Great Hall. Except, he had to remember that he had given P- Harry the name of Evan. He had to call the child Evan, especially around Umbridge.            

Feeling self-conscious- after all, he had fainted yesterday, and never returned to class- Snape made sure that he wore an extra nasty scowl today. No one was going to mess with him and live to tell the tale…er, perhaps they might live, but they’d wish that they died! He would see to that. Albus can’t protect them forever, the Potions Master thought evilly, a smile coming easily to his face as he glided through the halls.            

Harry, on the other hand, had no such fantasies about torturing other classmates. He gurgled happily in his dada’s arms and liked to watch the way the man’s long hair moved as it dangled tantalizingly above him as they walked on. If only Harry could have that hair! It was wonderful to play with!           

Entering into the Great Hall, Snape took the time to glare at each and every student that looked over at him, whether it was shyly done or otherwise. After his fall out with Umbridge, he did not think that he should be seen being soft today. But then, how hard could he really look with a drooling little cracker-muncher hanging all over him? Sighing, the professor decided that there was nothing he could do at the present except deal with it.            

Taking up his usual seat, Severus was at least pleased to see the Minerva was sitting next to him today. She nodded towards him with a “good morning,” like she always did, while Snape, in returned, only dipped his head slightly. He was not much of a morning person, even if he did wake up early. But with Harry around, the professor did not quite know what he was anymore, since he never slept! 

Dumbledore was seated talking animatedly with Filius, much like he usually did, while the half-goblin’s eyes were glazed over as the Headmaster went about his usual rants. A spark of amusement shot through the Potions Master as he could quite sympathize with the poor little man, but he was infinitely glad that it was Filius enduring the Headmaster’s ungodly talking instead of him. At least that was good.           

Snape found himself surprised that things were actually quite calm that morning. Harry hadn’t fussed much, and he was sucking away happily on his bottle. His big green eyes were staring up at Severus adorningly, much like they always did. And for the first time, the professor found that he was able to enjoy that look. Perhaps children weren’t so bad after all? Well, certain ones weren’t bad…maybe…

“My dear boy!” Dumbledore’s joyous shout caught the Potions Master unaware, and startled the poor man, causing him to shake the little baby in his arms.            

“Fool!” Severus hissed hotly, worry spiked through him.            

As if not ashamed at all, Albus smiled openly, a damned twinkle in his eyes. “So sorry, my dear boy. But on this delightful morning, how is your dear boy?”           

“He was better before you began to talk,” the professor sneered, still fussing over the little boy in his arms, hoping that nothing terrible had happened.            

“Aw, no harm done,” the Headmaster smiled easily.            

Harry suddenly got a look about his little face, a look that Severus had come to know and fear. An evil thought struck the younger man’s mind, and he could feel horns growing out of his head. “Headmaster,” he said smoothly. “Would you look him over? I really am still quite new at this, and that jolt you caused might have made something happen to him.”           

“Give him!” Dumbledore held out his arms, much like a little child himself, making Severus wonder if it was a good idea to give Harry to such a man. But the thought of vendetta forced all worry aside for a moment, and he passed the baby on.           

The instant Harry did not feel his father’s hands holding him, he began crying. The whole hall looked up towards the Head Table, and gawked amazedly. Not even Dumbledore the figure of Father Christmas himself could please the little one as much as the Potions Master Grinch. It was inconceivable!            

“What’s wrong, little one?” Albus cooed. “Are you unwell? Do you not like me?”           

But just as the Headmaster held the child up close to his face, to see the green eyes, Harry lurched back, and threw up in the old man’s face. The whole hall was silent.            

That is, of course, with the exception of Snape, who proceeded to throw back his head, and laugh hysterically.            

“Finally!” the Potions Master laughed. “Finally! Now you know how it feels!”           

The other professors were horrified by their colleagues’ reaction, but they could not dwell upon that as they were finding it quite hard to contain their own laughter at their employer’s plight. The students, who had not heard exactly what the Potions Master had said, but saw his reaction, could hardly believe their eyes. Again!           

Slowly, the Slytherin began to follow their Head of House’s lead and began giggling, at first, before they were all rolling on the floor laughing. Next, surprisingly, where the Gryffindors, who could not help but find the humor in the whole situation. Then the Hufflepuffs, and last the Ravenclaw. Soon the entire hall was flooded with laughter, even the teachers.            

Spitting up the spit up, Albus held the baby at arm’s length, before he held Harry out in the direction of Severus. Taking the baby away from the messy Headmaster, Snape felt a bit lightheaded from his laughing. Merlin, he’d not laughed like that since…well…when was the last time he’d laughed? Truly laughed? Ages, he decided.            

“Haven’t you ever hear the saying, don’t shake the baby?” the Slytherin tisked before he began to clean off Harry’s face, delighted that the old man got the worse end of the deal. At least Harry liked to be clean, or it appeared that he did. If he could just pass the brat around to others when the child decided to be messy, perhaps parenting wouldn’t be so bad?           

Umbridge, forgotten for a time, was the only one that did not laugh or smile. Instead, she gave rather nasty looks over to Dumbledore and Snape. When the Head of Slytherin caught it, he sent his own, nastier scowl right back, undeterred. Two could play it that game!           

When breakfast was done and over with, the Potions Master went to his classroom, hoping to actually get something done. He set Harry inside his little crib, before he went about straightening his desk. Merlin, who’d subbed for him? They were more disorganized than a hippogriff locked in the Ministry! He’d have to have another talk with Albus about his sub.            

As he was moving vials around, the professor happened to look over to see little P- Harry’s eyes widen in awe at the sight of the shiny containers. Even though he had vowed to hate this child forever, Severus found himself, yet again, smirking at the innocent wonder. “Like them do you?” he asked. “Perhaps I’ll make a Potions Master out of you?”           

In response, Harry giggled and clapped his hands. Again, Snape smirked.            

The seventh year Gryffindor and Slytherin class came in after that, and the professor wanted to groan. Why, in all of God’s green creation, did he have to deal with the despicable Weasley twins? Of all the children in the school- other than Harry Potter…and maybe little Weasley boy and the Granger girl- Severus hated the twins the most. He was convinced that they were nothing by genetically mutated monsters that were made and designed to torture him.            

“Oy! Professor Snape,” Weasley one called, the moment he sat down, his hand in the air.            

“Ten points from Gryffindor, for your disrespect, Mr. Weasley, and a detention too,” the Potions Master growled, not even bothering to look up. “And a detention for your brother as well.”           

“What! What’d I do?” Weasley two cried out in outrage.            

“Nothing, at the moment, but you will soon enough,” the professor sneered. “And it would be a pity to have only one Weasley brother and not the complete set.”           

The rest of the class went by surprisingly smooth, with Harry’s sneeze being the only interruption. Although that one little sneeze had almost given Snape a heart attack when he thought that the child had become ill. It never occurred to him that there might be dust in the air. But he had had to push his panic aside in pursuit of watching the other children’s cauldrons to make sure nothing exploded.            

When the class ended, the Weasley twins began to mutter about the unfairness of Snape. “Why’s it always him?” Weasley A asked.            

“Don’t know, bro,” Weasley B answered. “And to think, that Dumbledore actually hired that guy to deal with kids!”           

“Well, he’s got his own now, apparently,” A sneered.            

“Yes, the poor little guy,” B shook his head sadly. “Could you imagine having Snape for a dad?” he shivered dramatically.            

“Ah, but at least with the little guy around, Snape’s finally the ‘dada’ professor!”           

As the twins laughed hysterically, they did not see the great, looming black shadow that had come up behind them. If they had, they probably would have lowered their voices into an acceptable range for speech. Only when the hands of said looming figure placed themselves on the shoulders of the two teens, did the boy realize that they were in trouble. They turned around slowly, icy dread in the pit of their stomachs.            

“That’ll be detention with Filch, Weasleys,” Snape sneered down at them. “And a week’s worth of detention.”           

“For what?!” the boys cried together.            

A wicked smile spreading across his face, sending absolute dread through the twins, the Potions Master looked each of them in the eyes. “I’ll come up with something. Don’t you worry about that.”           

Both boys groaned. Since when had Snape ever developed a sense of humor?

******           

As the day went on, the students all vowed never to give their Potions Master an excuse to be ‘happy’ again. After the man’s son had thrown up on the Headmaster, Snape’s ‘joy’ had quickly spread throughout all his classes. The man was throwing out detentions like they were rose petals! He even graciously offered to walk each of them to their detentions before threatening to lock them in a small room for the rats to gnaw on.            

One Ravenclaw actually had to nerve to inform that professor that Hogwarts was spelled against having rats inside the school, with the exception of pets. Snape had not seemed overly concerned. Which, of course, was a very bad thing.            

He had leaned in close to the boy, so that their noses were almost touching, before he had answered, “Well then I’ll make some.”           

Everyone had believed him.           

And Severus was actually have a fairly good day. It was almost like normal. Harry had been very well behaved. Snape actually had to admit he had had a hard time keeping up appearances when Neville Longbottom blew up yet another cauldron and Harry had started to giggle and clap when Snape had begun to thoroughly chastise the other boy for his failure and incompetence.            

When Severus looked down into the gleeful little face, he decided that perhaps they were related after all. He too would have laughed at such a scene if it had not wasted so many expensive ingredients and his valuable time. Children could be so inconsiderate sometimes!           

It was when he was going to dinner that night that the entire good days events were all but washed away when Dolores Umbridge came strutting over.

“Professor Snape, I need a word with you,” she did not look pleased.            

Having to stop himself from rolling his eyes, Severus complied and walked off to the side of the hall, in an out cove with the intolerable woman. “What is it?” he snapped. “Evan needs to get to dinner.”           

“It’s actually about your Evan that I wish to speak to you about,” she put her hands on her hips.            

“Well, what about him?” Severus asked defensively, instinctively cuddling the boy closer. After all, this was his son now, and he was not going to let this toad near him.            

“Although the Headmaster seems to think that having the boy here is fine, I do not. Nor does the Ministry,” Umbridge growled. “His embarrassment at that little…monster’s stunt at breakfast this morning was deplorable! How is he to keep order when none of the children respect him?”           

“How dare you!” Snape hissed, his voice a soft silk. “How dare you insult my son like that, and to my face, no less! The only one I find deplorable, madam, is you!”            

“Why yo-”           

“Do not interrupt me,” the father snapped. “You have the audacity to come up to me and call my child such a despicable name, and then you proceed to speak out against the Headmaster? Madam, the only reason you are teaching here is because the Ministry placed you here. You were not hired for your skill or intelligence. You were hired here out of force. And let me tell you, that even if you had actually put in an application, you would have been on the bottom of the selection list!”           

“Why I never!” the witch huffed. “I have never been spoken to in such a manner!”           

“Really?” Severus quirked an eyebrow. “That’s surprising.” Harry giggled. He liked it when dada made his eyebrows move.            

“The Headmaster and the Ministry will hear about this!” Umbridge huffed. “You’ll see! The Headmaster will be sorry for hiring a Death Eater who brought his whelp!”           

It all happened so suddenly, Severus hardly remembered it at all. The next thing he knew was that he had his wand in hand and that Umbridge was tired up, her mouth gagged, hanging upside down from the ceiling. An unattractive sight, really.             

It was at that moment that the Weasley twins came walking down the hall, and they froze when they had seen their Potions Master all but attack their DADA teacher. Turning around, Snape and the twins merely stared at each other for a very long moment, neither party really knowing what to say.            

At last, Snape put his wand way calmly, and shifted Harry in his arms. “Take the blame for this and I’ll monitor your detentions,” he said smoothly.            

The twins, quite taken back by the fact that not only had Snape attacked Umbridge, but was bartering detentions with them was quite surprising…but in a good way.            

“Or, we could just not tell anyone-”           

“And you monitor our detentions-”           

“And we not have to get in trouble for this.”           

Looking up at his handy work, Snape shook his head. “No. I want people to see this. You not tell and take the blame, and I’ll throw out your week’s worth of detentions.”           

“Done!” the twins said in unison.            

With that taken care of, Severus cast a memory spell on Umbridge before he looked back at the boys. With a small nod and a flip of his cap, he walked off for dinner.

In his arms, Harry smiled up adorningly at his father, even more thrilled to see the smile on the stern Potions Master’s face. Justice was done. Nobody called his son such a name and would get away with it!