-II-

"My magic? You can see magic?" Severus looked hopefully at the old man.

"Of course, I can. I'm an aura reader. I can see a huge magic field around you."

"Really?" Severus heart stopped for a moment. He still had magic? And it was a large amount of magic that intrigued the old wizard? "But... my magic was destroyed."

"No, it's hasn't. Your old system of using your magic is destroyed, but not your magic itself. When I first met you, I could see a great powerful aura, but it was somehow restrained. I wondered if you had put up the restraints yourself. Now they are gone and your aura is clearer. Not as powerful as before, but still magnificent."

Hope. Finally, hope. Severus felt so light, and he felt the corners of his mouth go up without being able to prevent it.

"I fear our journey was a bit tiring. Hamid especially needs rest before his first school day tomorrow. It would be best if we retire."

Poppy showed them there rooms, and Alastor ordered his boys to use the bathroom and get ready for bed as well.

-II-

Hamid went up to Professor McGonagall calmly. He was not afraid. He did not need anyone. Learning with his master was all he was interested in. Master Radgarid wanted him to attend this school, and that was the only reason he stepped towards that old hat in the professor's hand. At least that was what he was telling himself.

"Ah, what an interesting mind, telling yourself that you need nobody. But your heart is looking so desperately for someone to befriend."

"I have my master. That's all I need."

"No, my boy, you need much more, and I know exactly the house where you will find what you need. Gryffindor!" The last part was shouted out loud and the Hat was lifted of Hamid's head.

Professor McGonagall was smiling at Hamid and gestured him to sit down at the Gryffindor table.

With an emotionless expression on his face, he went over to the table. He did not need friends, and those children here were much too noisy for him. They looked at him as if he had two heads. He looked at Harry. The boy was waving his hand frantically for him to come over to him. This morning he had gotten to know Severus and Harry better because he was using their bathroom. Severus seemed to be calm like him. Grumpy, but calm. Harry was friendly and tried to hold a conversation with him. It seemed he was a very social boy, and so Hamid was surprised at how much Harry's behavior changed the closer they had come to the Great Hall. He seemed to feel very uncomfortable around the other students.

Hamid went over to Harry. It could not hurt to have someone at his side who knew were to go. Harry had made room for him to sit down.

"These are my friends, Neville, Ron, Hermione, and Dean. They are all sixth years."

Hamid nodded politely at the people that were introduced, but he did not care for their names. He would do this all alone. Harry could be helpful for the first days, but all in all, he hoped they would let him be.

"So, you are from India? How is school over there?" Hermione asked.

"We are mostly home-schooled or choose a master to teach us," Hamid said curtly and then looked away in hope the girl would stop asking him questions.

"Hamid doesn't like to speak much. Give him some time to adjust, Hermione, before you bombard him with all your questions," Harry said, smiling insecurely first at Hermione and then at Hamid. Hermione looked puzzled back at Harry, but Hamid nodded thankfully at him.

"Why are you so different outside with others?" Hamid asked on their way to History of Magic.

"Different?"

"You are insecure and try to avoid the other students."

"Oh, haven't they told you? Severus and I had a de-aging accident. Only two weeks ago, I was sixteen and Severus was my Potions Master."

Hamid stopped and looked surprised at Harry. "You were de-aged? So you still have all your old memories?"

"Yes, but some are a bit shaken and confused. Some are placed far in the back of my mind, but I'm luckier than Severus. His mind suppressed more memories to be able to function and he has headaches from it. He was very hurt before the accident and had lost a big part of his magic. His magical system was destroyed by Voldemort. You know about Voldemort?"

"Yes, Master Radgarid has told me about it. You both are war heroes, but he didn't mention that you were de-aged. That's interesting. A bit like reincarnation. All the hidden knowledge in your head is still there. It must be odd to know a spell theoretically, but to not be able to use that knowledge correctly. Amazing!" Hamid looked fascinated at Harry.

"I don't think it's that fascinating. More frightening, and sometimes even annoying. All my classmates...they are annoying. I feel older than them. I don't like them, and they look at me as if I'm still my older self." Harry sighed. "I'm really glad you are in my class now."

"I hope you won't be disappointed. I'm not used to communicating much. Master Radgarid is often scolding me for it, but I like to be alone."

Harry's face fell. Severus was already so calm and broody and never started a conversation on his own. Now Hamid would be another one who felt his talking was annoying.

"Don't look like that. I...maybe I will make an exception for you. It could bring me further in my training. Master Radgarid says communication is necessary to reach a higher level."

Harry had no idea what Hamid was talking about. He sounded like an adult in the body of a teen. In a weird way, Hamid fit in perfect with the weird friendship between Severus and Harry.

Finally, Harry had someone who sat beside him without gaping all the time at him. Hamid was very intelligent and quickly understood what the teachers wanted from him. Harry was surprised. In Transfiguration, Harry had been miserable because he was sharing a table with Severus and now had to tell Hamid that he could not sit by him. "Ehm, Hamid, I can't share a table with you in the next class. Severus is there as well because we have Transfiguration with the Ravenclaws. Severus has some difficulty, and it wouldn't be fair to let him-"

"Calm down, Harry. I don't care if I have to sit on my own. Sit with you brother." Hamid sat down in a free chair beside a Ravenclaw girl and did not look disappointed. Harry relaxed, but seeing Severus' grumpy expression changed it quickly. "What's wrong, Sev?"

"Nothing." Severus avoided looking at Harry.

"Great," Harry mumbled and got his book out. There was no time to ask Severus more questions as Professor McGonagall came into the classroom.

Hamid watched Severus and Harry unobtrusively. He was wondering about Severus' problems. He had only gleaned a little about the situation from what he had seen and heard yesterday and this morning. The long-haired boy seemed to be very frustrated, and Hamid saw that he was getting angrier at himself. Hamid know that feeling and behavior very well. Before Master Radgarid had taken him under his wing, he had been like Severus. He had been angry at himself and the whole world for making his life so hard for him. He had survived a fire, but at great cost. His whole family had died and he had been badly burned. His lungs were damaged, and he had been unable to use magic for the next two years due to shock. Only Master Radgarid was able to help him use his magic again and find a new will to live. Maybe his master could help Severus as well. He seemed to be a nice person. His time at Hogwarts could be very interesting.

/

Nervously, Severus waited for Alastor or Poppy to come out of the Great Hall after lunch. He did not feel well and he hoped they would show pity and allow him to skip his last class. Even though Care of Magical Creatures was one of the few classes Severus liked, he was sick of school. First, Potions was a disaster because he had gotten into a fight with Charlie over not being allowed to prepare the ingredients, and then Transfigration had been horrible as well. He had not been able to perform the spell they learned and it frustrated him to no end. At the moment, he hated magic.

Severus had snapped at Oliver and Alicia until they had given up getting him into the Great Hall for lunch. So now he was standing outside the Great Hall, knowing he would be in trouble for not showing up for lunch and nevertheless waiting eagerly for his adoptive parents to show up.

A few minutes later, Alastor came through the huge doors and stopped in his tracks, seeing his son. "What's going on, Severus? Why aren't you inside eating?" He stepped closer to the dark-haired boy but stopped when he saw Severus back away.

"I...I was waiting for you or Poppy."

"You could have come in to speak to us." Alastor let his magical eye roam over Severus' body.

Severus shook his head. "I don't feel well. I wanted to ask you to let me skip Magical Creatures to go home and sleep."

Alastor frowned. "What's wrong?"

"I don't feel well," Severus repeated.

"You already told me that. I meant why are you feeling unwell? Minerva said you had problems in class, and I heard rumors about you and Charlie arguing."

Severus paled even more and looked with big fearful eyes at Alastor.

"Okay, go home, but call James or Maria via Floo immediately. I want them to check you through. You should talk with them about your problems in class. Can I trust you to do so?" Alastor finally stepped close enough to lay his hand on Severus' shoulder and then was surprised by the boy's sudden change of mood when Severus hugged him and started to cry. "Maybe it's better if I bring you home."

Severus shook his head while his face was still buried in his father's robes. "I can go alone. I'm sorry." When he pulled away, Alastor cupped his cheeks.

"Severus, we will talk when my last class is over, okay? Will you be all right until then? Poppy is at St. Mungo's."

"I will be fine. I just want to sleep a bit."

"Fine. Go home then." Alastor followed Severus worriedly with his eyes as he made his way home with slumped shoulders.

Severus was glad that he could hold his tears back until he was very close to their quarters. Getting his old nickname Snivellus back was the last thing he wanted. When he stepped in the living room, he stopped in his tracks. On the couch hunched over some old parchments was Radgarid, and now he was looking up at Severus' tear-stained face. "What's wrong, Severus?

Severus was paralyzed from shock and fear. He did not want Radgarid to see him so weak. This was embarrassing enough. He could not say anything and stood there, motionless.

"Come over here, Severus." Radharid waved his big hand. When Severus' feet obeyed without him being able to fight it, Radgarid asked," Does Alastor know you are here?"

Severus nodded. "He allowed me to come back."

"Well, then sit down and tell me what happened."

Who knew what the old man was able to use on Severus wandlessly, but Severus started telling him everything. His problems with school, his fear of being a Squib, and his wish to never have to go to class again.

"You cannot run away from yourself and your own magic, Severus. Your mind is working against your magic." Radgarid tapped Severus' forehead. "You won't be able to perform magic if you are scared of it."

"I'm not scared. I want to be able to use my magic, but I can't." He pulled his wand out to show Radgarid, but the old man grabbed it and tossed it away. Open-mouth, Severus stared at him.

"You don't need that stupid stick now. I already told you that you have an amazing and unique magical aura. You need to learn to feel your magic and use it again. The way you used to use it was destroyed and is scarred. It's no wonder you have problems using your magic. Later, you will be able to use it, but right now you are pressuring yourself too much. Learning to use your magic will take time. More than a year, Severus. School will be hard work for you and you shouldn't make it harder for yourself by expecting too much."

"But I need to go to classes and I need to pass them. Alastor and Poppy won't let me stay home."

"And that's perfectly right. Staying at home would dwarf your magical system. It needs permanent stimulation even though it is just the magic others are using around you. Living at Hogwarts will help you, and going to class will help you even more. See it as therapy and not as something to pass."

"But it is embarrassing to not be able to do what everyone else can do."

"Then you need to learn something none of your classmates can do that will help your magical system to regenerate as well."

Severus looked puzzled at Radgarid. "What?"

"You were able to perform a few wandless spells as an adult, right?"

Severus thought hard. His headache came back, but he also remembered his wandless magic. "Only a few."

"You did, and that's important. Your head and your wand are making you uncomfortable with using magic. I offer to teach you another way if you agree to three conditions."

"What conditions, and what will you teach me?"

"I will need to test you before I can tell you what I will teach you, but I can already tell you the conditions. First, you need to promise me to go to school. I will teach you thrice a week, but only if you attend classes. Just attend. I don't care how you are managing with the content of the classes, just that you try your best and do your homework."

Severus' mouth dropped open. Did Radgarid know about his Charms homework?

"Second, you need to trust me enough to go into your mind to close some doors in there. Your old memories are hurting you and the pain is distracting you from learning and healing."

"But then I won't remember my former life."

"You will still be able to remember things and see images of your memories, but there will be no emotions attached to them. I will be careful of which memories I hide like that. I promise you to be very careful. I'm experience with things like this, and I can reopen those doors whenever you wish. If something happens to me, Albus could reopen them as well. I would want him here when I rearrange your memories so that he knows where I close the doors."

Severus gulped.

"You don't need to agree now. The third condition is that you let someone-or better, some different people-feed you magic regularly. At the moment, your magical core is not running at full speed. It is holding back because it realizes that it will take more time than usual to regain the used magic. A regular magic feed would stop your magical core from depleting to its minimum. I would like to test some people around you for their ability to feed you magic. The more compatible people we find, the better. So consider if you are willing to follow those conditions. Do you want to take the test now? Are you already declining my offer?"

"No, I want to do the test. Can I at least choose the people you ask for the feeding?"

"I will test some people and provide you with a list of candidates tomorrow. Then you can decide if there are some you would not want to feed you magic. It is very intimating and you need to trust the people. I will judge them by their aura, but for the final test I need you to see how your magical core reacts to them. I can see that by the change of your aura during a feeding."

Severus nodded. "What kind of test do I have to do?"

Radgarid smiled. "You don't have to do much. Just stand close to me so I can see how your aura reacts. So come, stand in front of me."

Nervously, Severus stood up and positioned himself in front of the old man. "Closer." Severus obeyed, his heart beat speeding up. He jerked back when Radgarid formed a bowl with his hands and a flame grew in them. "Come closer again, Severus. There is nothing to fear." Not taking his eyes off the flame, Severus stepped closer again. Suddenly, the fire became water and Severus looked puzzled at Radgarid.

"Interesting," the old man mumbled and the water became a small twirl of air. Then the air changed into soil, and Severus felt a calmness fall over him. He was immediately reminded of the relaxing atmosphere during Herbology Club. He wanted to bury his fingers in the cool soil and let it run through his fingers.

"Ah, so it will be earth magic."

"Earth magic?"

"Yes, I will teach you earth magic, wandless earth magic. You will learn to get in contact with your magic, to feel it, and then you can use it for wand magic. Training for earth magic will help stimulate your magic to build new channels and restore old ones. I'm positive that it will help you. Tomorrow, we decide your feeders and then we can start your training. I will ask Hamid to help you. He hasn't mastered earth magic yet, but he can use fire and water."

"He doesn't speak much. Maybe he doesn't want to help me."

"He is a calm boy. Give him time. I'm sure he will like to have a partner in training."