Harry snuck up the top stairs of the astronomy tower. He needed some space- no matter that it was 2 in the morning- since his head was still reeling from the information Dumbledore had told him a couple of nights ago.
   

Seeing no one, he took off his invisibility cloak, curled up in his usual spot by the window, and prepared to spend yet another sleepless night staring up at the stars and thinking-or trying to forget- he wasn’t sure which at this point since it really didn’t matter so much anyway in the grand scheme of things.

“Kill or be killed. Become a murderer or be murdered.”

The words still echoed and bounced around off the inside of his skull.

Shaking his head, he glanced up at the night sky and was once again enthralled with its beauty. How it could still be so peaceful and unscarred after the events earlier in the week, he didn’t know, but found it strangely calming. Harry easily found Ursa Major and Minor and then looked around for some other constellations. The ironic thing was his astronomy grade would probably benefit from this nocturnal outing.  His eyes tracing a path across the clear night sky, he finally found the constellation he was looking for. Hercules- the man who had quite literally at one point held the weight of world on his shoulders, much like Harry felt he was expected to do now.

“But I can’t become a murderer,” Harry said to himself quietly.

“But aren’t you one already? What’s one more death to you?” A voice echoed in response in his head.

“I don’t know what you’re talking about.” Harry insisted stubbornly.

“Really, what about Cedric, or Sirius? How many more will you kill before you realize the truth?” the voice replied.

At the mention of Sirius, Harry pictured him falling through the veil again. He swore that image would be with him until the day he died no matter how much he tried to forget it. Painfully Harry blinked back the tears that had started to form again.

“Murderer- You killed him Harry. You killed him,” The voice echoed again and again inside his brain. “This was all your fault. All of it YOUR fault.”

“STOP IT!” Harry screamed inside his head. But then he realized it was right. All of it HIS fault. If he had just tried harder at Occlumency… if he had listened to Dumbledore in the first place… if he had bothered to use the two-way mirror Sirius had given him…if he had…

 “Mr. Potter out of bed as usual I see. Curfew obviously doesn’t apply to the Golden Boy now does it?” Snape mocked.

Harry jumped, startled at the sudden jarring of his solitude, but not before “I just can’t be the hero everyone expects me to be anymore,” escaped from his lips.

“What was that Mr. Potter? Not all of us can understand your mumblings.”

“Nothing sir. I’ll just be heading back to bed now.”

“That certainly did not sound like nothing. Tell me what you were doing up here or I’ll add another detention onto the one you’re already receiving for being out past curfew. Now, Potter.”

“Stargazing sir.”

“And why could you not do this from Gryffindor tower? And more importantly why was this activity more important than sleep Potter? Finals are over so there is no more assigned Astronomy homework.”

“I… I was also thinking sir. Being up here helps clear my mind sometimes. And it’s not as if I can sleep anyway.”

“Thinking about what? And don’t you know that you could ask Madame Pomfrey for a sleeping draught if you couldn’t sleep, or is the Great Potter above that as well?”

“I didn’t ask Madame Pomfrey for a sleeping draught if you must know because those have stopped working! As for what I’m thinking about, what do you think I’m thinking about given what just recently happened?! Sir.”

“Tone, Mr. Potter. The headmaster may tolerate you screaming, destroying his office and being altogether disrespectful but I. Do. Not. Now am I correct in assuming you’re upset over your godfather’s recent passing?”

“Yes sir.”

“Potter this is a war. People die, you can grieve for them, but you have to move on, otherwise the pain becomes more than one can bear.”

“I know that. But…”

“But what Potter?”

“His death is my fault.” Harry mumbled.

“What?”

"His death. Is MY fault.”

“Mr. Potter DO NOT ever let me hear you say that again. Black’s death was no more your fault than it was anyone else’s including his own.”

“But I was the one who went rushing to the Ministry, instead of waiting like you always seem to enjoy rubbing in my face.”

“Yes, you did. However Black had a choice, he could have stayed in Grimmauld Place where he would be safe, but he chose to leave the safety of those wards and go to the Ministry.”

“Well maybe if you hadn’t goaded him all the time sir.”

“Mr. Potter it was HIS choice. Black unfortunately also had the Gryffindor trait of leaping before he looked so to speak. That does not make this your fault. Am I clear?”

“Yes sir.”

“Anything else?”

“The Prophecy sir.”

“The Headmaster told you?”

“Yes sir.”

“Potter as I said before this is a war. People die. The death of the Dark Lord will prevent the death of possibly hundreds of others. However do not let the Prophecy control you. Those who have put too much faith in prophecies have often come out the worse for it. An example being Oedipus, whom you may know from your studies in Astronomy since many constellations are named after Greek mythological figures. My point is don’t let the Prophecy control you, and don’t try to run from it since that will solve nothing. Instead live your life, let those dunderheads you call friends help you within reason. It will make things easier in the long run. Now off to bed with you, we’ve talked enough tonight.” Snape said gesturing towards the door.

“Yes sir.”

“And Mr. Potter?” Snape called as Harry was on his way out, “Detention. My office directly after the Leaving Feast tomorrow.”

“Yes sir.” Harry sighed. Some things never changed.

Snape glanced out at the stars again before shutting the door after him.

“I’ll watch over him Lily. Even though he, and that meddling old fool don’t make this easy for me. I’ll continue to watch over him for you, my Lily-Flower.”