Harry entered the Potions’ dungeon classroom, his second class of the day on Monday, and sat down in his usual spot. He began pulling out his notebook and textbook when Ron took a seat on one side of him and Hermione the other. He was going to take his father’s advice about his friendship with them, but right now he wanted to cool off a little and didn’t feel like speaking to them just now. Having eaten breakfast down in the dungeons, Harry had made it to his first class just as it was about to begin so this was the first time since breakfast where his friends could talk to him. Luckily a minute later Severus walked in to the classroom so he didn’t have to worry.
After a short lecture, the students were left to their own devices to brew the day’s potion. Though he wasn’t feeling as well as he was after breakfast and during his first class, Harry did his best to concentrate on his brewing, coughing now and then. At more than one point, he felt Ron and Hermione’s eyes on him, but he ignored them. He was having a hard enough time brewing as it was. Turns out, one of the potions Severus had him take that morning was making his thoughts somewhat fuzzy. Or at least he thought it was the potion.
A while into brewing, Harry glanced at the clock on the wall, and sighed. Time was going by much too slow as he still had twenty minutes left until the end of the class. He wasn’t too sure he could make it, the longer he stood there brewing. All the fumes in the room were starting to get to him and he was beginning to feel lightheaded. Not able to stand anymore a few minutes later, he sunk down onto his stool and continued his brewing.
Just as he was finishing the last step of the potion, and a crucial one at that, he had to sneeze. He silently cursed his body’s timing and turned away from his cauldron the best he could as he sneezed forcefully into his elbow. Hoping his potion wasn’t ruined, he turned back around and looked inside his cauldron. Instead of the shimmering light grey liquid that he had moments ago, the potion was now a mucky dark brown congealed mass. Knowing he failed the assignment, since there wasn’t time to start over, he turned off the burner under his cauldron, crossed his arms on his desk and dropped his head onto them, groaning quietly.
Severus, who had been walking up and down the classroom observing everyone’s potion, stopped in front of Harry’s desk, looked into the cauldron and then back to Harry. “Potter.”
At the sound of his name, Harry flinched and wearily looked up, meeting the eyes of the potions master.
“Another failure I see. I should have expected as much,” he stated icily. “It’s still amazes me how you were able to get into this class.”
Harry ignored the snickering coming from the Slytherin side of the room and looked back into his cauldron. The potion was now sending puffs of foul smelling brown smoke into the air.
Severus pulled out his wand. “Evanesco.” He replaced his wand, and with a scowl still on his face, looked back to Harry. When a Slytherin at the other side of the room called his name, Severus finally broke eye contact and left Harry’s table.
Harry watched his father walk away and rested his head back on his arms. Even though the two had discussed it at length last night, Harry realized he really hated Severus calling him Potter and being spoken to in that tone of voice. It brought back all the horrible memories of the past five years worth of potions classes. As he sat there, he had to force himself to think about their conversation last night.
When Severus first told him they had to continue their act of loathing one another while in public, he knew immediately he was going to hate it. He knew they had to keep up appearances to keep their secret and their lives safe, but that didn’t mean he had to like it.
Severus had to reassure him many times that whatever happened outside of their private quarters was only an act. If Harry needed reassurance that it was an act while in public, he was to really look at his father. The man may be acting and speaking like he had been, but his eyes would tell him the truth. His father promised him that he would never again see the loathing and disgust in them that had once graced his face during every encounter they had in the past.
Harry spent the next ten minutes of class alternating between staring at the tabletop or at his empty cauldron while listening to the bubbling cauldrons around him. He realized he was glad for once that he received a zero and didn’t have to worry about his potion anymore. He was coughing more frequently and had to sneeze a few more times and no doubt it would have caused more problems while brewing. He only wished the class would be over soon. It was boring just sitting there.
“You should now be done with your brewing,” Severus finally stated from the front of the classroom. “If you haven’t already done so, bottle up a sample and leave it on your desk before you leave. Your assignment for tonight is to read chapter 20. Potter, stay behind.”
While putting his book and notebook into his book bag, Hermione turned to Harry. “Harry, you are sick aren’t you?” When Harry didn’t respond she continued. “I’m sorry for thinking you were lying. Why didn’t you just tell us?”
Harry abruptly stood up and slung his book bag on his shoulder. “Like you would have believed me,” Harry said coldly, still upset with the morning’s conversation. “Professor Snape wants to see me and I don’t want to get a detention for taking too long.” Without waiting for a response, he walked up to the front of the room. He knew he shouldn’t be treating her that way, but he wasn’t ready to talk yet. He was still too angry.
Hermione looked at Harry sadly. She really blew it that morning and now she felt awful. She only hoped Harry would come around. She looked to Ron, who obviously felt the same way, and the two walked out of the classroom quietly discussing the situation.
While Harry was standing at the front of the classroom, Severus walked around and picked up the vials that were on the front row tables to pass the time. He needed to wait until the classroom was empty before he began speaking to Harry.
Two minutes later the classroom was finally empty. “Take a seat Harry,” Severus said while indicating to one of the stools at the front row of tables. After Harry sat down, dropping his book bag on the ground, he sat down next to him. He studied Harry for a minute. “Are you doing okay?” he finally asked.
“Yeah, I feel okay. About the same since breakfast. The fumes were just getting to me.” He rubbed his forehead. “I just wish I didn’t ruin my potion and end up with a zero on the assignment.”
“You are not getting a zero.”
“But I didn’t finish,” Harry stated. “I sneezed and ruined it. You vanished it. How could I not get a zero?”
“You will re-brew the potion when you are well. After all, it is my fault your potion was ruined.”
Harry looked at Severus confused. “Your fault? I’m the one who ruined it.”
“Yes, but I’m the one who let you go to class when you are still fighting the flu. I should have made you stay in bed today. If you were sent to the hospital wing by your Head of House, there would be no doubt in my mind that you would still be up there at this very moment.”
“But…”
“You are not at fault and you will not be getting a zero.” Severus stood up. “We’ll discuss this again later tonight. Right now, you better get going to your next class. I do not want to find out you received a detention for being late.” He looked at Harry meaningfully. “Remember what your conditions were if I let you attend classes.”
Harry nodded. “I remember.” He picked up his book bag and stood up, ready to leave the classroom. “Bye Dad.”
“Goodbye Harry.”
~SH~
Entering the DADA classroom, his last class before lunch, Harry quickly walked to his desk and sunk down into the chair. He set his book bag on top of the desk and rested his head on it, coughing a few times. He was beginning to feel really awful. Wanting to see what was scheduled for today’s lesson, he raised his eyes and looked at the board. The entire class period was to be a practical lesson.
Knowing that he didn’t have the strength or energy for the class, and remembering his promise to his father, he stood up from the desk, grabbed his book bag and walked to Remus who was up at the front of the room. He stopped a few feet behind the man, and rested his book bag on one of his feet. “Excuse me. Professor Lupin?”
Remus, having been setting up some props, turned around and smiled. “Oh. Hi Harry.” He looked to the clock on the wall. “You’re here a bit early today.”
“Yeah.” Harry turned to the side and sneezed into his elbow.
“Are you sick?” he asked concerned.
Harry nodded. “The flu.”
“I see.” Remus looked over Harry and noticed the slight shivering and pale face. “You really look unwell. You should be in the hospital wing. I’m surprised Madam Pomfrey even let you out to attend classes.”
“She didn’t. I was never there.” A violent shiver racked Harry’s body.
Remus pulled out his wand and waved it at Harry, checking his temperature. “You have a fever Harry. You really shouldn’t be here.”
“Yeah, I know. That’s what I’ve come to talk to you about. Dad told me if I wasn’t feeling well, I should go back to bed. That’s where I’m going to go right now. I thought I’d be able to attend class, but I’m just not up to it, especially it being a practical lesson. I wanted to let you know before I left.”
Remus couldn’t help but smile at how Harry referred to Severus. “Thank you for letting me know, Harry. Now I know you just want to go to bed, but I insist you visit Madam Pomfrey. Why don’t you go on up to the hospital wing and I’ll have Ron bring your things to your dorm?” Remus turned around to walk to the back of the classroom to speak to Ron who had just walked in.
“No, professor,” Harry almost shouted, which caused him to cough a bit. Don’t.”
“Why not?” Remus asked confused, walking back over to Harry.
“I’m going down to my bedroom in the dungeons.”
“Very well.” Remus was not completely sure Harry was telling the truth though. The boy usually did everything he could to get out of getting help when he was ill or injured. “I’ll tell you what, Harry. I’ll firecall Severus for you and let him know you’re heading down to his quarters.” He waited for Harry to argue, but surprisingly it never came.
Harry pulled his book bag up and put it on his shoulder, looking grateful at Remus. “Thank you Professor Lupin. If you don’t mind, could you also tell him that I’m worse than I was in his class? He’ll know what I mean.”
“Of course Harry.” Remus put a hand on Harry’s shoulder. “I’ll firecall him right now.”
“Thank you, professor.”
“You’re welcome Harry. Feel better.”
Harry gave a small smile and walked out of the classroom toward the dungeons.
Remus didn’t even wait until Harry was out of the classroom before he went to his office to firecall Severus. Even though he was slightly worried about Harry’s health, he was smiling the entire time. He knew Severus must be ecstatic that Harry finally accepted him as his father. He definitely was.
~SH~
The corridors were still full of wandering students on their way to classes, so Harry decided to take the secret passage down to dungeons. Not sure if he could be heard by anyone wandering the regular corridors, he decided he wouldn’t make a sound until he got inside their quarters, and made a mental notice to ask Severus about it later. It was easier said then done however, as halfway there he felt an intense tickling in his nose and throat. Not sure if it was going to evolve into a cough or a sneeze, he clamped a hand around his mouth and nose hoping to stall either one. He knew he was probably being ridiculous, but he didn’t want to take any chance of being discovered.
Feeling extremely weak, relief swept through him when he rounded the corner and the door was in front of him. He immediately placed his palm on the door, and when it opened, rushed in and closed it shut behind him. He couldn’t wait to get out of his uniform and crawl into bed. He walked into his bedroom and dropped his book bag on top of the desk. He then went to take off his uniform and only got his robe halfway off when the tickling he felt earlier manifested into a harsh coughing fit. When the fit ended, leaving him breathless and exhausted, all thoughts of removing his uniform vanished. He walked to his bed and collapsed on it, burying his face in his pillow and closing his eyes. He’d remove his uniform later.
~SH~
Severus was in his office grabbing the quizzes he gave his first years on Friday, when his fireplace lit up. Turning around, he spotted Remus’ head in the dancing flames.
“Severus, if I could have a moment please?”
“In the event you didn’t notice, Lupin, it is almost time for classes. I do not have idle time for chit chat,” he growled and turned back to his desk.
Remus huffed. “It is about Harry.”
Severus spun around, robes swirling at his feet, and quickly walked to the fireplace, his whole demeanor changing. Worry replaced irritation. “Harry? What happened? What’s wrong?” Never did he think he’d ever be this worried when someone came to talk to him about Harry.
“Calm down Severus.” Remus held up a hand. “Nothing has happened.”
“Well then?” He couldn’t think of any reason why the werewolf would be firecalling him then, especially minutes before classes were to start.
“Harry is on his way down to the dungeons. He sounded terrible; really congested. He was pale and was shivering so I checked his temperature. He’s running a fever. He also said that he’s worse than he was in potions, whatever that means.”
Severus nodded. “Thank you Lupin. I will see to him.” Not bothering to see if the conversation was over, Severus set the quizzes back on his desk and took off for his quarters. He missed the smile on Remus’ face.
Upon entering, he immediately knew Harry hadn’t arrived yet. Knowing he was short on time, as classes were set to start in less than ten minutes, he called one of the school elves to bring him a cup of tea. While waiting, he poured glasses of water and juice and set them on a tray. When the tea arrived he set that on the tray as well. After hearing some of the symptoms Harry displayed in his potions class, in addition to what Remus told him, Severus then went to retrieve the variety of potions Harry might need. He, of course, would want to check with Harry before administering anything and not just take the werewolf’s word, though for once he felt Remus was more than likely spot on.
Hearing the door in the hallway shut, Severus grabbed the tray and headed to Harry’s bedroom. “Lupin wasn’t lying,” he stated upon entering, having heard Harry coughing. “You sound dreadful.”
Harry, having been on his bed, rolled on to his side and tried to glare at Severus, but it ended up looking more like a grimace. “Thanks. You really know how to make a person feel better.” He coughed again and groaned, pushing his face back in to his pillow.
Severus just raised an eyebrow, both at the comeback and at the amount of congestion in Harry’s voice. He hadn’t sounded that bad earlier. He walked to the night table and set the tray down.
He took a seat on the side of the bed, studying Harry. Harry was pale, like Remus had mentioned, with bright pink spots high on his cheeks. He knew he should use his wand to get Harry’s true temperature, but whenever possible, he wanted to have physical contact with the boy. Part of it was for his own selfish needs, but it was also for Harry. Harry hadn’t gone out and said it, but he had a feeling the boy never had any type of contact like this in the past. Besides, he’d be able to gauge Harry’s temperature well enough with his hand. “Come over here.”
Harry slowly scrambled up and sat against the headboard close to Severus. Before he even knew what was happening, Severus’ hand was moving toward his forehead. Harry wanted to say that Professor Lupin had already checked his temperature, but he couldn’t form the words. Instead, he closed his eyes and leaned in to the cool touch, savoring the now familiar feeling.
“You’re warm.” Severus stated after removing his hand. He grabbed the fever reducer from the tray.
Harry slowly opened his eyes and noticed Severus holding out a vial in front of him. He took it and gulped down its contents. After handing it back, he leaned his head against the headboard sighing and closed his eyes.
“What is bothering you, Harry?” Severus asked softly.
Harry didn’t answer, suddenly feeling slightly uncomfortable with the concern his father was showing. He hadn’t had any problems answering before when Severus asked, but for some reason he did now. Maybe it was because it was his own fault he felt as bad as he did. If he had stayed in bed instead of attending classes like his father had asked last night, he probably wouldn’t be feeling as awful as he was. In some ways, he felt like he deserved to feel this way.
“Classes are to start in just a few minutes.” He put a hand on Harry’s leg. “I know how hard this is for you, but in order for me to make you feel better, I need to know what’s bothering you. I can’t stand it when you’re hurting and won’t tell me what’s wrong. Come on Harry,” he said with a touch of sternness to his voice.
With a warm feeling in his chest over his father’s words, he finally replied. “I’m cold, achy and really congested.” He opened his eyes and looked to Severus. “Everything hurts; my throat, my head, my face, my stomach a little. Even my clothes touching my skin hurts.”
Severus looked at Harry sympathetically. He then grabbed the remaining two vials on the tray and held one out to Harry. “This is the pain reliever. It along with the fever reducer should help with your achiness. This…” he held out the other vial, “is for your congestion. It should help with your coughing and sneezing. However, be warned, this potion does cause drowsiness.”
Nodding, Harry downed both vials. “Thanks.” He looked down to his lap and played with his tie, his earlier thoughts returning. “I’m sorry.”
Knitting his brow, Severus looked at Harry in confusion. “Sorry for what?”
Harry shrugged his shoulders and looked up to Severus. “This. I know I should have stayed in bed, and because I didn’t, I’m worse. I’m sorry I pushed you into letting me attend classes today.”
Severus didn’t respond. He stood up from the bed, brushed Harry’s hair off his forehead and left his hand on the top of his head. “Get in to your pajamas and rest. I’ll be back at lunch.” He removed his hand and got up to return to his office, as classes were to start in two minutes.
Scooting over to the edge of the bed, Harry watched Severus leave his bedroom, and a few seconds later, heard the entry door open and close. With a sigh, he stood up and changed out of his uniform into his pajamas. He took a few sips of the hot tea and flopped back on to his bed. He lay staring at the ceiling for a while. Feeling exhausted, he closed his eyes and tried to sleep. However, he wasn’t tired enough for sleep. Slightly bored, he got up and grabbed his Charms text and notebook from his book bag. He might as well get started on the homework that was assigned that morning.
After setting the notebook next to him on the bed, Harry propped up his pillows, slid down so he was lying partially under his comforter and opened the text to the required chapter to begin reading.
~SH~
The first year Hufflepuff and Slytherin students rushed out of the potions classroom a few minutes before lunch was to begin. As soon as the last one left, Severus began rounding up the few tools and ingredients the scatterbrained students didn’t bother to put away. Compared to most of his lessons with this group, or any of his classes actually, today’s was by far the worst. Two cauldrons had exploded. One actually being his own. He couldn’t even remember the last time he had one of his potions explode while teaching.
Both explosions were because of his lack of concentration. He had been too caught up in worrying about Harry that he didn’t even realize he put too much ginger root in his own potion while giving his demonstration, or foresee the inevitable disaster with one of his Slytherins who was too busy watching the girl sitting in front of him instead of his cauldron.
He shook his head as he put back a pestle on the shelf at the side of the room. His lack of concentration while teaching had indeed caused problems, but he would never give up caring for Harry. He didn’t even think he’d ever again be able to live without the feeling he got while caring for the boy. Harry was all that mattered in his life, and it still felt a bit strange to even think that.
As he walked back to his desk at the front of the classroom, he looked at his burnt cauldron and quickly repaired it with the wave of his wand. It was obvious he couldn’t worry about Harry and conduct classes at the same time. But then, this being the first time Harry was unwell and absent from classes, maybe his lack of concentration was a one time thing. If it wasn’t, would he have to cancel his classes? Either way, it was something he decided to think on heavily.
Glancing around the classroom and seeing everything was in its place, he picked up his students’ homework, walked out into the corridor, locking the room behind him and headed directly to his quarters. He walked immediately to the kitchen, dropped the homework on the table and put some water on to boil for tea. While the water was heating up, he decided to see how Harry was doing and to find out what he would like to eat for lunch.
He slipped out of his teaching robes and set them on the chair in the study on his way to Harry’s bedroom. He went to enter the bedroom and stopped just inside the doorway. Harry was asleep on his back with his Charms text tented on his chest. One leg was on top of the comforter and the other was underneath. Giving a silent chuckle, he walked quietly to the bed and removed the text, which Harry still had one hand on. Spotting the notebook on the empty side of the bed, he leaned over and removed that as well.
Once both items were placed on the desk, he walked back over to the bed and readjusted the comforter so all of Harry was underneath it, not just one leg. He didn’t want to wake him so he could eat lunch, so he just let him sleep. Checking to make sure he didn’t need any juice or water, Severus left the bedroom and headed back to the kitchen.
Water now boiling on the stove, he made himself a cup of tea and sipped it while making a sandwich for lunch. Sitting down, he pulled the homework assignments over to him and alternated between eating lunch and grading homework. As he sat there, he kept hoping he would hear Harry waking or coming into the kitchen, but neither happened.
With ten minutes until classes were to resume, Severus set aside his quill and walked back to Harry’s room. He wanted to check on him one more time before he left. Harry was still asleep. He left and went to his study. Finding a blank piece of parchment on the desk, he returned to the kitchen and began writing a note for Harry in the event he woke up before classes ended for the day. When his note was complete, he called a house elf for a bowl of soup. As soon as the soup was delivered, he put a warming spell on it. Bowl of soup and note in hand, he returned to Harry’s room and set them both on the night table.
With one last look at Harry, he left his quarters and returned to the potions classroom. He only hoped his next few classes went better than the one he just had.
~SH~
Yawning, Harry rubbed at his eyes and turned on to his side, cuddling under the comforter. He glanced at the clock and saw it was just after two. He began wondering if Severus came here for lunch instead of the Great Hall. As he yawned and burrowed further into his pillow, he immediately knew his father had come here. The last thing he remembered was reading his Charms text, and now the book and his notebook were gone from the bed. And he clearly remembered not being completely under the comforter either. Smiling widely, he looked at the night table again and that’s when he saw the folded piece of parchment and a bowl. He ignored the bowl for the moment and grabbed the parchment to read.
Harry,
I am sorry we were not able to have lunch together, but your rest was too important to disturb. I have left you a bowl of soup for lunch, as I wasn’t sure what you would be able to eat. A warming charm has been placed on the bowl. Please try to eat some of it.
I unfortunately have a staff meeting to attend after classes end today, so I will not be back until four pm. If you need me before then for anything, all you have to do is say my name. I will be there as soon as I can.
Rest and I will see you later.
Dad
Harry’s smile, if possible, doubled in size at the way Severus signed the note. Dad. He read the word again and closed his eyes as they filled with tears. That word made him feel so lighthearted. He couldn’t explain it, but he wanted to keep that note forever; to be able to treasure it always. It was the first thing he ever received with the word dad on it. Slipping out of bed, he walked to his book bag and put the note inside. He would add it to the photo album up in his dorm as soon as possible.
Deciding he’d better try to eat, he grabbed the bowl of soup and sat back on the bed against the headboard. He ate about half the bowl before setting it back on the night table, unable to eat anymore. With a yawn, he slid back down and pulled the comforter up to his chin. He had wanted to read some of his Charms text, but he was too tired. His father was right. The potion for his congestion did make him drowsy. Yawning again, he closed his eyes. He was asleep a few minutes later.
~SH~
Severus was seated at his kitchen table, reading his newest potions journal an hour after the staff meeting ended when Remus firecalled.
“Severus, do you have a few minutes?”
“What do you want Lupin?” His eyes never left the journal.
“May I come through?”
Severus hesitated and was almost going to deny him entry, but changed his mind. Lupin had, after all, notified him about Harry hours earlier. “Fine.” Severus set the journal down on the table and called for a school elf to bring some tea. “Take a seat,” he said to Remus who walked in to the kitchen.
Remus sat down across from Severus as the tea arrived. He took one of the cups and held it in his hands, staring at it with a small smile.
“Well?” Severus questioned when Remus didn’t start speaking. “Did you wish to speak with me or did you come just to have tea? If it is the latter, you can take your leave.”
After taking a sip of tea, Remus looked to Severus. “I have come to inquire about Harry. How is he doing?”
Severus’ eyes glanced towards the direction of Harry’s bedroom, concern written on his face. “He is as well as can be expected, though not as well as I had hoped. He is currently sleeping. He will no doubt be back to his mischief in a few days.”
“That is good to hear.” Remus smiled. He took another sip of tea and then set the cup on the table. “How are you doing Severus?” he asked carefully.
“What kind of idiotic question is that?”
“I heard something interesting this afternoon from one of my first year Hufflepuffs. But I couldn’t quite believe what I was hearing.” He let out a little chuckle.
Harry, who had been sleeping in his bedroom, was slowly awaking. Upon hearing Professor Lupin’s voice in their quarters, he awoke fully moments later. He didn’t think the DADA professor would ever be allowed inside their quarters. His father and the professor, after all, hated each other. Wondering why the man was here, he slipped out of bed and walked quietly to the hall’s entrance. He knew he shouldn’t eavesdrop, but he wanted to know what was going on. When he reached the entrance, he leaned against the wall, out of sight, and listened.
“Severus, did your potion truly explode while you were demonstrating?”
“It did,” Severus stated, simply.
Harry’s jaw fell open at that admission. The thought was inconceivable. The man was a potions master for Merlin’s sake. He was meticulous with his brewing. How could one of his potions explode?
“But it was a first year potion.” Remus looked at Severus in astonishment. “What happened?”
Severus answered with only one word. “Harry.” He stood up from the table and began pacing the length of the kitchen.
Harry froze and his heart almost stopped beating. And as Severus continued speaking, his stomach started to clench into a tight knot.
“I couldn’t concentrate. All I could think of was Harry. I was fine this morning when I knew he was in classes. But after he came down here to bed, I was constantly worrying. He’s been sick since Saturday. There’s no one to watch him down here. What if his fever got worse?” He ran a hand through his lanky hair. “I don’t think I can do this,” he surprisingly admitted.
“What?” Remus asked, eyes following Severus up and down the length of the small kitchen. He’d never seen Severus this agitated before.
Severus stopped pacing and faced Remus at the table, placing his hands on the back of the chair in front of him. “I can’t teach and care for Harry at the same time. Today, luckily, it was a harmless potion exploding. Well, two potions…mine and a student’s.”
“I didn’t hear about the other one. Though a student’s potion exploding isn’t all that rare, Severus.”
“I know that Lupin,” he growled. “But what happens when it’s a volatile potion? If I’m not concentrating one hundred percent while teaching these classes, someone’s bound to get seriously hurt. Possibly killed,” he added quietly. He sunk down in the chair in front of him and laid his arms out on the table. He had thought he made up his mind about the situation hours earlier, but now he wasn’t so sure. “I can only do one. I can care for Harry or I can teach. Doing both is not an option.”
Harry, beginning to tremble and breathe rapidly, as he knew which option Severus would take, turned around and fled to his bedroom. Not wanting to hear any more of the conversation, he closed his bedroom door and crawled into bed. Curling into a ball, he ignored the stinging in his eyes and tried to go back to sleep.
Remus sighed and looked at Severus seriously. “Severus, you cannot be thinking what I think you’re thinking? Do you know what that would do to Harry now that he’s gained your trust?”
“No, I’m not thinking that.” Severus sighed. “I do not want to give up having Harry as my son. I just don’t think I can care for him while he’s ill or injured and teach at the same time.”
“You can do both,” Remus stated. “Just send Harry to the hospital wing.” The answer seemed obvious to him. “Let the medi-witch care for him.”
“I can’t do that. I will not do that. What would it say to Harry when I send him off to the hospital wing every time he’s hurt or sick?” He put his elbows on the table and rested his head in his hands. “The Dursley’s more than likely never provided care for him in those situations. I do not want to be like them. Harry deserves more than that.”
Not answering, Remus thought it over for a minute. “There is another option. You do know that you do not have to teach every single day of classes. How many times do you see the other professors leave for a few days here and there to take care of ailing family members?”
“No one is to know Harry is my son.” Severus argued.
“You can still take time off. Professors are also allowed to take days off for personal reasons. The headmaster does not require us to give an explanation.”
“I have never taken a day off before.”
“You have a good reason now. If Harry is so important to you, it is something you need to do. I know it’s all new for you; all these worries and concerns, but just take a day or two off until Harry is well again.” Remus stood up. “My bet is that the next time Harry comes down with something, you’ll be more comfortable with the situation and will able to teach just fine. Think about it Severus. You owe it to yourself…and to Harry.” He walked to the fireplace and flooed to his own quarters without a backwards glance at Severus.
Severus took a sip of tea and stared at the table, thinking over Remus’ comments. He was surprised that he let all his concerns slip to the werewolf, but was somewhat grateful for the advice.
~SH~
While Severus was finishing washing the dishes from their dinner, Harry was curled up on the sofa under a blanket resting against his pillow, staring at the flickering flames in the fireplace. He had wanted to stay hidden in the bedroom, but Severus forced him to eat dinner at the kitchen table. It had been an extremely uncomfortable thirty minutes for him.
Harry swallowed thickly and turned his head enough to steel a glance at the professor in the kitchen. No doubt any moment now Severus would tell him he’d be spending the next couple of days in the hospital wing and that he was no longer wanted.
When the dishes were clean and put away, Severus walked to the living room and sat down on the sofa. He turned to Harry. “Harry, there are a few important things we need to discuss.”
Shifting his gaze from the fireplace to his blanket covered knees, he nodded and bit his lip, knowing where this conversation was going. He should have known he wasn’t meant to have a father. Surprisingly, he wasn’t angry. He was just extremely upset. He had come so close.
“First, you will not be attending classes tomorrow.”
The first thing out of his fath…professor’s mouth was he wasn’t going to be attending classes? Was that the man’s way around saying I no longer want to be your father? You’re too much work? Face crumpling and a painful burn beginning in his throat and behind his eyes, he stood up and grabbed his pillow, intent on going to his bedroom to pack up his few belongings. The less time he was down here in the dungeons, the better.
“Harry.” Severus reached out and grabbed Harry’s wrist to stop him from leaving the moment he saw Harry’s expression. He honestly didn’t expect that kind of reaction. “Sit down.” When Harry was sitting down next to him, he released his wrist. “What is wrong?”
Harry shrugged, still not looking at Severus.
Severus studied Harry. The lack of communication, downcast eyes, incredibly sad expression, and hunched shoulders could only mean one thing. He had obviously overhead part of his conversation with Remus. He had seen Harry’s closed bedroom door right before dinner and had known it wasn’t closed before he spoke with Remus. He didn’t think anything of it at the time, but now it made sense.
“You heard what Professor Lupin and I were discussing,” Severus stated, not questioned.
In response, Harry shrugged his shoulders again, blinking furiously.
“Look at me, please.” When Harry made no move, Severus took Harry’s chin in his hand, and gently turned his head so they were looking at each other. “Whatever you are thinking, stop.”
“But…”
“Stop.”
“But you don’t want m…” Harry yelled, almost at the point of tears.
“Do not finish that statement, Harry,” Severus warned.
Harry clamped his mouth shut at the tone.
“Now, let me finish what I was going to say before you thought to leave. If you want to finish that statement when I’m done, then by all means, do.”
Dropping his eyes, Harry nodded.
“I would like you to stay here tomorrow and not attend classes. I do not want to have a repeat of today. It only caused a setback in your recuperation. Having to concentrate on your lessons, both practical and lectures, when you were feeling unwell was difficult enough. But the exertion of walking through the corridors and up and down the stairs to go to and from your classes was too taxing on your currently weakened system. I should have stood my ground last night. Again, I am sorry.”
“Having eavesdropped on my conversation with Professor Lupin,” Severus paused as he watched Harry’s face turned slightly red in embarrassment and raise his eyes to look at him, “you know doubt heard that I had my own potion explode on me while teaching. I obviously cannot currently teach and worry about you at the same time.”
Harry dropped his head and eyes again in guilt.
“That is why I’ll be spending tomorrow down here keeping an eye on you. As you still have a slight fever and your symptoms haven’t receded any, I’m more than a little concerned. I will be speaking with the headmaster about obtaining a substitute for my classes.”
Severus let that sink in before he asked his next question, trying not to smirk as he did. “Now, do you want to finish your earlier statement?”
Clamping his lips together, Harry shook his head minutely. “No.”
“Good. Now we only have one final matter to discuss. Your eavesdropping and resulting punishment.”
Harry jerked his head up. “Pu…punishment?” He gulped. He couldn’t believe he was going to be punished, and for something as small as eavesdropping.
Besides the Dursley’s giving him unfair ‘punishments’ he had never been punished before in his life, detentions excluded. What did that actually mean? Was he going to get spanked? He’d seen Mrs. Weasley do that to Ron once. But he was too old for that, wasn’t he? Or maybe he’d be grounded. He’d heard that’s one of the punishments Seamus receives often. Maybe he wouldn’t be able to eat dinner for a week. Maybe he would be forbidden to spend time down here. He really didn’t like that last one and hoped it never crossed his father’s mind.
“Yes,” Severus responded, interrupting Harry’s internal thoughts. “Punishment. Now, do you know why I’m going to punish you for eavesdropping?”
“Eavesdropping is no big deal. I don’t need to be punished. You can’t punish me for that,” Harry stated outraged.
Severus raised an eyebrow, a dark look crossing his face, at Harry’s outburst. “As I am your father, I can and I will,” he stated sternly.
Harry gulped and looked down. He immediately found it hard to be mad at being punished and decided to answer his father’s question. “It’s rude to listen in to other people’s private conversations,” he said quietly.
“And?” Severus queried when Harry didn’t continue.
“Erm…and…and there are some things I don’t need to hear.” Harry then thought about what he felt in the hall and just a few short minutes ago. “Eavesdropping can hurt me unnecessarily,” he finally admitted.
“That is especially true. Eavesdropping is a bad habit, Harry. I know your curiosity drives you to do many things, but I would hope you will not eavesdrop again. If I find out you have, you will be punished. Keep that in mind.”
“I’ll try.”
“You better do more than try,” Severus stated.
“So, what are you…I mean, how are you going to punish me?”
Severus looked at Harry levelly, tapping a finger on his lips while thinking it over. “I think for this first infraction, I will take away your broom for a week. Once you are well of course.”
Harry looked at Severus in shock, his mouth open. “My broom?! But I just….”
“It is a punishment Harry,” Severus interrupted. “And a mild one at that.”
“Ok,” he said quietly. He looked down and played with the pillow that was resting on his lap for a minute. He then looked back up to Severus, seriously. “I…I’m sorry I eavesdropped, and for what I was thinking earlier.”
“Harry.”
“I know it was stupid to think that you…”
“Harry.”
“…I know I probably jumped to conclusions…I know I don’t….”
Sighing at Harry’s continued ramblings, Severus reached an arm around Harry’s shoulders and pulled him close. “Be quiet already.”
“I’m sorry…” Harry said, voice wobbly.
“Shhh.” He ran his hand up and down Harry’s arm. “I know you’re used to adults going back on their word…”
“But I shouldn’t have thought you…I mean, you’ve done so much already, and…”
“Quiet,” Severus almost whispered. “I will never change my mind about you or make you leave. Remember that.”
Harry didn’t say a word. He just sat there enjoying the feeling of his father’s arm around him.
Severus chuckled a moment later. Here he was trying to comfort Harry because he was upset at the thought of having to leave his presence, when all his other students would jump up and down in celebration the moment they could leave his presence.
Surprised at the still unfamiliar sound, Harry looked up. “What’s so funny?”
“Nothing,” Severus responded with a smile. He ran his hand up and down Harry’s arm again. “Nothing.”
Harry leaned his head on Severus’ chest and scooted closer to him, Severus’ arm tightening around him in response. He smiled and closed his eyes.
~SH~
Severus took a seat in Albus’ office. While he waited for the man to finish his letter, his eyes traveled to the perch Fawkes was resting upon. Before he could even form the thought that Fawkes looked dreadful, the phoenix burst in to flame. It still amazed him every time he saw it.
“Severus,” Albus spoke a few seconds later, eyes still on the parchment in front of him. “What brings you here this late in the evening?”
“I wanted to give you some warning that I will not be able to teach my classes tomorrow.”
Albus looked up and set his quill down on the desk. “You won’t be able to teach tomorrow? And why is that?”
Severus cleared his throat. “I have some more important matters I need to attend to.”
“More important? What could be more important than teaching your students?” Albus gazed at Severus through slightly narrowed eyes.
“I am fully aware that I do not need to discuss my reasons with you, Albus. As such, all I will tell you is that I will not be teaching tomorrow. Also, there may be times in the future where I’ll need some time off as well.”
A smile forming, Albus looked at Severus somewhat excitedly. It was the first time that he could remember Severus actually asking for time off. He wasn’t going to deny his young teacher that. “I hope you will enjoy your time off Severus. You have nothing to fear with your classes. I will find a suitable substitute for you.” He stood up from his desk and folded the letter he had been writing into an envelope. “I do hope one day you will confide in me why you need the time off.”
“Thank you Albus.” Severus rose from the chair and left for the dungeons, ignoring the last statement the headmaster made. No doubt the headmaster himself would teach his classes. He only hoped he had a classroom left when he returned on Wednesday.
~SH~
Reaching the door to the secret passageway Wednesday morning, Harry stopped and turned around, facing the hall. He let his eyes roam from the bedroom doors to the little bit of the study he could see for a few seconds before he dropped his gaze to the floor.
Severus, who was shrugging into his teaching robes, spotted Harry still in their quarters. He sighed as he saw the look on Harry’s face. “You are not leaving for good. Remember you can come down here any time you want and can stay the night Fridays, Saturdays and even one day during the week.”
Harry looked up to his father who had now walked next to him. “I know. It’s just….”
“Harry,” Severus interrupted. “A lot has happened in the last five days. I know you’re reluctant to leave right now and go back to your normal routine. I am…” he stopped and ran a hand down his face, “…I am, I admit, reluctant to let you leave as well. But we both know you must.”
“I wish it was summer so I didn’t have to leave,” Harry stated quietly.
“There are only a few more weeks until the week-long Spring holiday. Then you may spend that entire week down here. But more than likely, by the time it comes you won’t even think about coming down here at all.”
“That’s not true,” Harry responded forcefully, shaking his head back and forth.
“You will eventually. It’s inevitable.” Severus tried not to let the hurt he felt at that thought appear in his voice. What sixteen year old would want to spend their free time with an adult?
Not knowing why exactly, Harry turned and gave his father a fierce hug. “I won’t,” he mumbled into Severus’ chest.
A few seconds later Severus pulled out of the hug and lightly turned Harry around with one hand while opening the door with another. He then placed a hand on Harry’s neck. “Go on to breakfast. And take it easy today.”
“I will.” He turned his head so he was looking at Severus again. “Thanks dad.”
Severus smiled. “Go.”
~SH~
Harry walked up the corridors to the Great Hall. When he entered, he spotted Ron and Hermione sitting towards the front of the Gryffindor table. At first he didn’t want to sit with them, but he remembered his conversation with his father on Monday morning. Readjusting his book bag on his shoulder, he headed over to his friends and sat down across from Ron.
“Hey mate,” Ron said around a mouth full of sausage as Harry sat down. “You look a lot better than you did at the beginning of the week.”
“Hi guys. Thanks.” Harry scooped some oatmeal into a bowl. He still didn’t have that much of an appetite from being sick.
Hermione put down her juice glass and looked at Harry seriously. “Now before you try to interrupt me, Harry, please let me finish what I’m going to say.” After receiving a nod, she continued. “Thank you. We know that whatever is going on with you is none of our business, but just know that we worry about you. I know you’re still probably angry with Ron and me, but I hope that we can get our friendship back to the way it was. We promise we won’t push you anymore. If you don’t want to talk, we won’t keep bugging you.”
Harry gave his friends a small smile. “Thanks guys.” He took a few bites of his breakfast then washed it down with some juice. “Erm…I’m sorry I went off on you the other day. I wasn’t feeling well and, you know, then you wouldn’t leave me alone. I snapped. I’m sorry.”
“No need to apologize mate,” Ron offered. “We know we were the ones to cause that reaction in you. Just forget about it.”
Having finished eating her breakfast, Hermione pushed her plate off to the side and crossed her arms on the table. “Harry, I now know you’ve been sick. I was worried about you Monday night since I hadn’t seen you since Potions. I went up to the Hospital Wing but you were not there. Where have you been staying?”
“I thought you just…” Harry began angrily.
“Harry,” Hermione interrupted, “I won’t know ahead of time whether or not you will want to answer a question I ask.”
Harry realized Hermione did have a point. “Sorry, Hermione.” He looked between his two friends. “I know there are some things you want me to tell you. I wish I could tell you everything. But not right now. When I am able to, I promise I will.”
“Right. Now let’s get back to breakfast,” Ron stated, trying to lighten the mood. “All this serious talk has me starving.”
The three laughed and went back to their breakfast.
Feeling thankful to Severus for his advice on Monday about his friends, Harry took a quick glance at the head table. His eyes met immediately with his father’s. He gave the man a small nod and smile and turned his attention back to his friends.
As the three finished their breakfast, Ron regaled them with the latest happenings in the sixth year boy’s dormitory. With Harry not around to pass the time, Ron had been using some of his brothers’ jokes in the dorm room. Once they finished breakfast, they headed off to classes, chatting and trying to return some normalcy to their friendship.
Chapter 33