A week and half had passed since the first Potions lesson. Tonight they would test their Dreamless Sleep potion. The Gryffindors wondered as they made their way towards the dungeon, how Professor Snape would know if the potion actually had the desired effect.

"He is probably going to sneak up to the Gryffindor Tower while we are all a sleep," suggested Dean.

"But he can't," Hermione said and the tone of her voice indicated that there was no room for argument. "He doesn't have the password."

"He could get it from McGonagall."

Neville was pale and looked very nervous. The thought of Snape watching him sleep didn't appeal to him at all. Harry agreed with him, but doubted that Snape would waste his time watching them sleep.

When they entered the Potion classroom, Snape was already waiting. He watched impatiently as the Gryffindors took their places; the door shut as the last Gryffindor took his seat.

"Like I said you are testing you own Dreamless Sleep potion. You will write an essay about your experience with the potion and if you haven't achieved the desired effect, you will research what you did incorrectly," The Potions Professor paused a moment to let his words sink in, "Of course I will know if your potion had the desired effect. A house elf will watch over you tonight. Now take you potion and be gone."

Harry stood up and walked towards Snape's desk, looking for the vial with his name on it. When he found it, he picked it up and left the classroom. A moment later Ron, Neville and Hermione joined him.

"Mine looks like that book described," Hermione said while showing her vial. The contents of it look exactly like Harry's and Ron's potion. Neville's potion however, had a dark blue colour instead of a deep purple one.

"Then mine failed," Neville said a bit disappointed.

The next morning Harry woke up well rested. He hadn’t had any nightmares and as far as he could remember, he hadn’t had any dreams at all. It had been a very long time since he was able to sleep without having nightmares. He was able to make this potion. Perhaps if he could brew enough of the potion he would be able to sleep well for a few nights. The ingredients were stocked in the student’s cupboard, so he could get them without having to steal them. He just need a place where he could put secretly brew.

The Room of Requirement! A smile spread appeared on Harry's face. Finally, he had found another way to deal with the nightmares and horrible memories. He didn't need his blade any more, he just needed the harmless potion. Although it was harmless, he had better make sure no one found out since he didn't want to explain why he needed the potion to his friends or teachers.

In a good mood, Harry dressed and went to the Great Hall for breakfast.
The subject of conversation between the sixth year students that morning was the outcome of the Dreamless Sleep potion. More than half the sixth years had succeeded in brewing thepotion correctly.

"I had terrible nightmares," Neville had dark bags underneath his eyes and he was pale.

"You look terrible," Ron admitted without shifting his eyes from his plate. All the other Gryffindors looked well rested.

"What class do we have first?"

"Defence," Hermione Replied. "Honesty Neville, don't you know the schedule by heart?"

Neville ignored her question.

"I'm sure Professor Lupin will understand it when you can't concentrate."
"You think, Harry?"

Harry nodded.

"Come one guys, we should go, we don't want to be late," Hermione said when students started to leave the Great Hall.
They all stood, picked up their bags and went towards the Defence against the Dark Arts classroom.

"What do you think we'll do this time?" Ron asked around the sandwich he was still eating.

"Don't talk with food in your mouth, it's disgusting."

" Lupin said he would test us on how we are doing with non-verbal spells," Harry explained. He was sure that he would pass the test and Hermione and Ron would probably pass as well since he had helped them.

Neville sighed. "I'm going to fail."Harry, Ron and Hermione ignored Neville's statement because they knew he was right.When they entered the class, they discovered that there were no desks or chairs. Even Lupins desk had disappeared.

"Can you close the door please?" Lupin asked once they had entered.
Harry, who stood closest to the door, turned around and shut it.
"Today I will test how far you have progressed with non-verbal spells. To pass this test you must cast a simple spell without speech. A disarming spell, like Expelliarmus, or perhaps a charm, will do." The werewolf let his gaze shift over the class. "If you do not pass the test, I will give you extra work and if needed, extra classes. Are there any questions?"

No one spoke.

"Good. If everyone could stand over there," he pointed at the wall where Harry, Ron, Hermione and Neville stood. When everyone had moved, Lupin continued. "Who wants to go first?"

Harry stepped forward. "I will go first."

Lupin nodded and invited Harry to come over to the middle of the classroom. "Try to cast a spell on me, but please, don't knock me into the infirmary." A small smile appeared on Lupin’s face.
Harry nodded, grabbed his wand firmly and pointed it on Lupin. For a brief moment Harry thought about the disarming spell and a jet of scarlet light left his wand and made Lupin’s wand fly out of his hand.

"Well done," Lupin said while taking his wand back. "You obviously passed."
Harry grinned and went back to his place beside Hermione and Ron.

"Well done!" Hermione whispered, a bit excited. "I hope I pass as well."

And pass she did. Everyone but Parvati and Neville were able to successfully complete the test.

"We still have some time left," Lupin announced. "But I am not starting with more advanced spells until everyone," his eyes shifted to Neville and Parvati "is able to cast simple spells without using words."

"Let us enjoy the weather!" suggested Dean.

"Yeah!"

"That would be fun!"

"We could work on our homework,"

"Let us go, please!"

Lupin smiled at the class. "Yes, go and have some fun but don't neglect your homework and keep on practising. It will make it easier to use more difficult spells non-verbal. Neville, Paravati, can you two stay behind, please?"
The class cheered and left the room, happy that they had gotten extra free time.

_____________________________________________________

The potion master was surprised with the report that the Houselves had given him. More than half of the sixth year students had managed to make a flawless Dreamless Sleep potion. He was even more surprised that only two Gryffindors had made a mistake. Professor Snape pulled the first essay in front of him and read it carefully. It was from a Hufflepuff student who failed to add the ingredients in the proper order. To Snape's horror the foolish girl had described her nightmares in detail. Halfway through the essay Snape stopped reading, marked it and threw it on a corner of his desk.

After forty minutes of correcting and inventing creative insults, he set his quill down. He stood up and went over to the student’s ingredients cupboard. After he had checked if it needed restocking, he could go to his private quarters and enjoy a free moment for himself.

He opened the cupboard and started to count the ingredients. When he was finished, he realised that someone had taken enough ingredients to make Dreamless Sleep potion for half a year. It must be someone of the sixth year, thought the potion master. Maybe I should inform Dumbledore.

He left the classroom, locked it and went to his private chambers. His private chambers could be entered by giving the right password to the portrait at the end of one of the dungeon corridors. Behind the portrait was a staircase that led to a dark wooden door. Snape opened the door and entered his living room. It had several high windows that looked out over the black lake but were charmed to look like the castle walls from the outside. The room wasn't painted in green and silver but instead covered by wooden panels. The furniture was made of dark wood and the seating of black leather. In the impressive fireplace burned a magical fire: it only could be extinguished by the professors order.

Professor Snape took Floo powder from a marble jar that stood on the mantelpiece, walked into the fire and threw what he had took from the jar into the fire while saying "Dumbledore's office!"
A moment later the potion master stepped out the fireplace in the office of the headmaster.

"Severus, my boy, to what do I owe this visit?" The headmaster asked as he closed the book he was reading.
Severus stepped out of the fireplace and sat down opposite of the headmaster.

"I am a bit concerned," Snape started. "Someone has taken ingredients enough to brew Dreamless Sleep for about a half year."

Dumbledore seemed to be lost in his thoughts for a several minutes.

"Sir?"

"That's indeed concerning," The headmaster admitted. "Who ever took the ingredients, it is someone who has trouble sleeping or someone who wants to sell the potions to other students, but the latter seems unlikely."

"But the potion is highly addictive," Snape said. "And if someone takes too much of it they can end up in a coma."

The twinkle had disappeared from the headmasters eyes. "Is there a student who always looked tired?"

Severus thought about it for a few minutes, trying to remember every student he had seen in his class. "I can't say I have seen anyone who looked very tired, But then again they could have used a glamour charm."

Dumbledore nodded.

"But I expect that the student is a sixth year."

"Why is that, dear boy?"

"Because they just learned how to make the potion."

"We should be extra vigilant," proposed the headmaster. "Searching the dorms won't help. I think this student is smarter than to hide his stock in the dorms."

______________________________________________________

Only a week of the first semester remained. Harry felt better than he had felt in a long time. Every night he took a vial of Dreamless Sleep potion so he could have a nightmare free night and every morning he woke up, full of energy. He had told Ron and Hermione that he took a vial of the purple liquid only if he had a nightmare the previous night, so they didn't know that he took a vial every evening after he closed the curtains around his bed. A part of him felt bad for lying to them, but Harry knew that he needed it. Without it the nightmares would haunt him and he would go back to his previous coping method: the knife.
On a rare occasion he felt the urge to cut again, to see a crimson red river flowing over his pale skin, but so far he was able to resist the urge.

Harry also looked a lot better than in the beginning of the school year. His skin wasn't as pale anymore and he had gained weight. However he didn't remove the glamour charm because his eyes remained a dull green rather than their old sparkling emerald.

“Harry could you stay, please?” Professor Lupin asked at the end of the last Defence against the Dark Arts lesson of the term.

Harry shot a questioning look at his professor, but dropped his bag again and waited until the other students had left the classroom. When everyone had left, Lupin sat down at his desk and Harry joined him.

“Harry,” Professor Lupin started carefully. “Please, let me finish before you interrupt me and yes, I know you won't like what I have to say, but it is necessary.”

Suddenly, Harry started to feel very nervous. Whatever the Professor had to say, it was something serious.

Lupin sighed, “You will have to return to your relative’s during the vacation because You–Know-Who has been attempting to destroy the wards on the house.”

Harry’s mind was set spinning by the unwelcome news. He had to go back to the Dursley’s? Before the summer? He felt sick. He couldn't go back.

“I can't go back!” Harry shouted in anger.

Lupin raised an eyebrow. “Why not?”

For a moment Harry didn't know what to say. He couldn't tell him that his uncle abused him. He couldn't admit they treated him worse than a slave.

“My uncle and aunt aren’t expecting me and they’ll probably be on holiday.”

“Don't worry. They already know that you are coming back during the Christmas break.”

“Why do I have to go back?” Harry almost whispered.

“You-Know-Who is trying to destroy the wards on your home and if you are in residence the wards are much more difficult to break.”

“So,” Harry thought about what Lupin said for a brief moment. “If I am at the Dursley’s the wards won't break and if I stay here, the wards will be undone?”
Lupin nodded.
“But he knows I am not there.”

“Indeed, but we believe that he wishes to get to you by capturing your relatives or perhaps he hopes that we won't notice the wards failing and return you there at the end of the school year.”

Harry sighed. He knew that nothing short of revealing his Ucle’s treatment would save him from having to return to that house .

“But why are the wards stronger when I am there?” Harry asked, still not understanding how the wards worked.

“I do not know the details of the specific wards, as the Headmaster does. I am sure if you ask him and he could tell you why and how,” Lupin assured.

Harry sighed again. “Can I go now?”

“Yes, if you need anything or your relatives are rude to you, feel free to contact me,” Lupin said.

“Okay.” Harry left the classroom.
.

He felt sick. Of all the things that Lupin could discuss with him, this was the last subject Harry had expected. He had never been sent back to the Dursely’s during the winter holidays and now, after Vernon treated him so bad, he had to go. He had no clue where he was going, he just walked. It was lunch time but Harry didn't feel like eating, nor did he feel like going to his afternoon classes. He was too worried and too afraid to concentrate. If he just could gather the courage to tell someone...

Harry shook his head as if he could drive away his thoughts telling someone was not an option. Who would help him anyway? He had always dealt with his problems alone and nothing would change that now. Maybe his uncle had changed. Maybe the company for which he worked wasn't going bankrupt any more. Harry swallowed, knowing that it was very unlikely. He would just have to endure it. Two weeks, that wasn’t too long, he could handle it. If he didn't go back, his only family might die at the hands of Voldemort.

Harry looked up and discovered that his feet had led him to the astronomy tower. The sky looked as Harry felt himself: dark and sober. The threat of rain was imminent, but did not detract from the amazing view. Harry gazed out upon the mountains, the Black Lake, and the Forbidden Forest.

________________________________________________________

“I'm sure he’s in the common room,” Ron dismissed, while he sat down in the Great Hall for dinner.

“Whatever Lupin said, it must have been serious.”

Ron sighed, annoyed that his girlfriend was always worrying over Harry. He didn't understand why she thought that something was wrong. Since the beginning of the year Hermione had thought that something was wrong with their friend. Harry was acting different, but Ron was sure that he was still coping with Sirius' death and needed a little . After all that’s what Harry himself had told them.

“I'm sure it's nothing to worry about.” Ron, said for probably the hundrenth time, as he filled his plate with roast and mashed potatoes. “Wouldn't he tell us if something was wrong?”

Hermione shrugged, clearly not convinced. “He won't even talk to us about his summer or about Sirius.”

“Hermione,” Ron said in a low, angry voice. “Can we please drop it?”

Hermione nodded.

“Good.”

After dinnerHermione nearly dragged Ron to the Gryffindor tower, complaining that he was too slow. They found that the common room empty except for Harry who was sitting in front of the fire. He was soaking wet.

“Harry!” shouted Hermione as she rushed towards him.

Harry looked up at her and managed to put a small smile on his face.

Ron walked slowly towards them and sat down in a chair near the window.

“What happened?”

“Nothing,” Harry mumbled, shifting his face towards the fireplace.

“But you’re soaked!”

Harry shrugged.

“Was it something Lupin said?”

Harry looked thoughtful at Hermione as if he was considering what to tell her. “I have to go back to the Dursley’s during the holiday.”

Ron felt his anger rise. Harry was skipping classes and sitting in the rain because he had to go back to his relatives?

“Oh,” said Hermione, clearly surprised by Harry's answer. Ron was sure she had expected to hear something terrible.

“Mate,” Ron started carefully, trying to keep his anger in check. “It's just two weeks. I know they aren't nice to you, but if you have to go back, I'm sure there is a good reason.”

Harry faced him and nodded slowly. “It has something to do with the wards. He is trying to weaken them and if I go back, he won't be able to do whatever he is trying.”

“It's only two weeks,” Hermione assured.

“Only?”

“Only?” Ron said angry. He wasn't able to control himself any more. Harry acted like he was going to hell instead of home for two weeks. “It's just two bloody weeks! It won't hurt you!”

Harry’s laugh was emotionless. “Like you have any idea how horrible they can be.”

“Harry, please, you don't want them to get hurt, do you?” Hermione begged carefully.

Harry shot an angry glare at her and opened his mouth to say something, but changed his mind and stayed silent.

“You have an easy life,” Ron accused. “We have no money at home and I always have to fight to get attention. For once something doesn’t go your way and you start to complain?”

Hermione opened her mouth to say something, but Ron didn't give her a change to speak. “The three of us do something heroic every year and we,” he pointed at Hermione and himself, “stand in your shadow while you get all the praise and now you complain because the Dursley’s don't treat you like a hero!”

Instead of shouting back at Ron, Harry stood up, gave Ron an angry glare and walked out of the common room.

“Ron, did you have to do that?”

“Hermione,” Ron said softly. “I'm just so tired of him. You're always worrying about him and he‘s always whining.”

Hermione bit her lip.

“Please Hermione,” Ron pleaded. He was afraid that Hermione would go after Harry and leave him alone. After all Harry was the famous one and he was just another Weasley.

Sensing his insecurity, Hermione nodded slowly and kissed Ron softy. “Just promise me that you’ll try to settle matters between you two.”

_______________________________________________________

The Christmas holiday passed quickly and before Hermione realised it, they were back at Hogwarts. The Great Hall was still decorated to look like a winter wonderland:big trees with icicles, singing angels and burning candles stood in very corner of the hall. The tables and benches were covered with a dusting of snow. After Hermione had admired the decoration, her eyes scanned the Gryffindor House table for her black haired friend.

“He isn't here Ron,” Hermione said softly, trying not to sound worried.

They hadn’t seen Harry on the train and now he wasn't in the Great Hall either. Ron took her hand and led her towards the table. Hermione sat down on the snow covered bench, which magically wasn't cold at all, and looked at the teachers. Lupin looked questioningly back at her. Hermione shrugged.

“Lupin doesn't know were Harry is,” Hermione whispered to Ron.

“Don't worry,” Ron assured her. “He probably just missed the train or something.”

Hermione tried not to worry during the feast, but failed. She felt guilty that she hadn't sent him a Christmas card or even a letter. She hadn't thought about him at all, she had been too busy having fun with Ron and her family while skiing in Switzerland.

Perhaps they just hadn’t found he on the train and he already retreated to the common room like he did at the start of every year. That thought made her relax a little bit.

The next morning she was worried sick. Harry hadn’t been in the common room or breakfast either. Instead of just waiting she sought out Professor Lupin, who also looked worried.

“Professor,” Hermione greeted.

The Defence against the Dark Arts teacher nodded curtly.

“Have you seen Harry?”

“No,” Lupin said. “But I'm going to his home after breakfast, to see why he wasn't on the train.”

Hermione nodded, but didn't turn away.

“He'll be fine,” Lupin assured, but he sounded worried.

“Okay,” Hermione said and she went back to the table to join the other Gryffindors.

“Did he know anything?” Ron asked without taking his eyes off his plate.

“Not yet, he’s going to his home in a bit.”

“I'm sure he’ll be fine,” Ron assured.

Hermione nodded and tried to focus her thoughts on the upcoming lessons instead of Harry.

________________________________________________________

Lupin walked towards the door of Number Four Privet Drive. He was worried. The whole morning he had wondered why Harry wasn't at school and why he hadn't sent an owl. At first he had thought that Death Eaters had attacked the house, but Dumbledore denied his theory by ensuring the wards were still up. Lupin took a deep breath and knocked at the door.

A horse faced woman opened the door. “Yes?” Her eyes scanned Lupin and widened when she realised who he was. “Thank god you came!”

Lupin frowned. “Is something wrong with Harry?”

“Yes! Come in!”

Lupin entered the house. “Where is he? What happened? Why isn't he at school?”

“We found him the other night,” she said while leading him up the staircase. “He hadn't come home and it was getting late so we went out to search for him and we found him all bloody and unconscious.”

“Why didn't you-”

“We wanted to contact you but we didn't know how! The boy left his owl at school!” They had reached the top of the stairs and Petunia pointed at the nearest door.

Lupin opened the door and stepped into the room. Harry was lying on a small bed with bandages around his arms, head, and chest.

“Merlin ,” whispered Lupin as he raced towards the boy, not paying any attention to the state of the room. “I have to get him to Hogwarts as quickly as I can!” He lifted the boy carefully, surprised by how light he was and rushed downstairs. Petunia opened the door for him. As soon as he was outside the wards he apparated to Hogwarts.

___________________________________________________________

Severus bemoaned the fact that he had to start off the term with a class full of Gryffindors. Before he started his lesson, he scanned the class noticing that Potter was missing. The Potion Master couldn't remember seeing him last night at the feast, but then again, he had skipped the feast at the start of the school year as well. The brat was probably still sleeping or too arrogant to come to class.

Snape banished the thoughts about the Golden Boy from his mind and focused on the class.
“Today,” he started, “You will brew a complicated potion; a potion capable of breaking a mind lock. He waved his wand at the blackboard and a long list of instructions and ingredients appeared. Intimidated, the students silently began gathering everything they needed to brew the potion.

Near the end of the period, the door flew open and Professor Lupin entered the class. Snape noticed that the werewolf was pale and out of breath.

“Severus.”

“Continue your potion,” sneered Snape and he walked towards Lupin. “Outside.”

Lupin nodded and followed the Potion Master. “We need your help in the infirmary,” Lupin said as soon as they were outside the class.

“Why?”

Lupin ignored Snape's question, and handed him a list with potions. “Be quick, Severus!” And Lupin ran away, back to the infirmary assumed Snape.

The dark eyes of the Potion Master scanned the piece of paper Lupin had given him and he knew that, whoever needed those potions, was in a bad shape, perhaps fatally injured.
Snape threw the door open and yelled “Class dismissed.” He ignored the questions of the students and started to take the required potions out of the cupboards. When he had every potion on the list, he walked out of the class, ignoring the students and hurried towards the infirmary.
As he entered the infirmary, he saw that Dumbledore, Poppy and the werewolf were looking down on one of the beds. Snape couldn't see who was lying in it.

“The potions.” Snape announced. Poppy bustled towards him, giving him a brief smile.

“Thank you, dear,” Poppy said, before disappearing into her office.

Snape was hestitant to discover who lay in the bed. Slowly, he made his way towards the bed and when he recognized the pale figure, his heart skipped a beat.