"I knew you were too weak boy." He turned and was startled to find Uncle Vernon there in the boys dorm with him, arms crossed and looking foreboding, though he had a smirk on his face. "That's why you're a freak. When you didn't come back this summer I knew you'd be off doing something freaky."

"No, he's not a freak." Harry turned the other way and found Sirius there, half hidden in shadow. "Not a freak at all, just my good for nothing Godson who left me in a lurch. It doesn't surprise me that he's back on the dirt."

"Stop it Sirius." Harry whirled to find Remus sitting on the edge of his empty bed, looking concerned. "It's not his fault that he's weak, he was obviously raised that way. He goes back to the dirt because he needs it to be strong."

Sirius and Vernon laughed then and Lupin jumped up and started waving his finger at them both.

"You're all wrong," came a fourth voice, and Harry turned to find his father, arms crossed and looking stern. "He is not a freak, he is not weak... he takes the dirt because he can't be trusted. It's in his nature. There's no changing what's in your nature..."

Harry bolted upright in bed, sweat pouring off him, soaking his clothes and the bed sheets. He wiped the sweat out of his eyes and stared around the cool dark room. There was no one there aside from the other boys. It had been a dream.

There was a tapping on the window and Harry's head snapped to the sound to find a brown barn owl with a letter in its beak. He pushed the heavy covers off of his legs and went to let the owl in. On the sill it held out it's leg to Harry, and as soon as the envelope was untied, it flew away. Harry closed the window against the chill and the cold wet snow that was drifting down outside and stood staring at the letter for long moments in the darkness, heart still beating erratically from the dream. It was from Remus.

"Harry? S'goin' on?"

He turned to see Ron sitting up groggily in bed and said, "Nothing, go back to sleep."

"'Right, I was just winning the world cup." Ron fell back onto his pillow and Harry could tell he'd fallen asleep right away again by the snores. He pulled out his wooden desk chair and sat down, using his fingernail to open the envelope. It was strange to have a dream with Remus and then get a letter from him right away.

Harry,

I'm sorry to hear that you haven't been getting along with your father. Yes, I was aware that you wrote to Sirius, but he would not let me see the letter. He said that you were adamant that it remain between the two of you. Has he written you back? Does your father know that you have been in contact with him? I hope you know that I will always be here to listen to you...

The letter went on with news about how Remus was doing, the full moon (Harry couldn't help but to let his mind wander to collecting asphodel), and a few other things. Thinking that he would rather stay up and write a reply than go back to sleep and risk falling into the same nightmare he had been in, Harry pulled out a fresh parchment.

Remus,

My father has apologized for not trusting me. He organized a potion brewing party for me, Ron, and Draco and we made potions to sell around the school so I could buy a new broom since I'm riding Ron's old one. We made half the cost in a single day. Draco reckons we can get a new one before Christmas. Hermione and Ginny made posters. We made invisible hair cream for the twins and decided to use it to make ourselves invisible... that didn't work so well and we ended up in the Entrance Hall half naked. Professors Snape and McGonagall said we deserved to be embarrassed and made us stand in front of a group of Hufflepuff girls. Sirius has not written back. I told him not to. I don't want to hear from him. I shouldn't have written him to start with. Professor Snape doesn't know.

Harry paused and thought for a moment. His last few letters back and forth with Remus had had little of consequence in them and he almost felt bad for taking up the man's time to read such mundane letters and have to reply. He didn't know what else to say, but also still didn't fancy going back to sleep just yet either.

What do you know about my dad James and the others turning into animaguses? I might like to learn someday. I don't think we're allowed to learn though so I don't think Madam Pince will tell me where to find the books if there are any. Do you get to choose what your form is when you try? How long did it take them to learn?

He wanted to put something about not wanting to ask Sirius, but refrained and ended his letter there.

As he lay in bed and tried to get back to sleep again, hands behind his head and cravings making his mouth water, Harry thought that maybe having an activity like trying to become an animagus to keep his mind from the cravings wouldn't be so bad. He had hardly felt the cravings at all while brewing with his father and friends, or when out collecting ingredients by broom in the middle of the night with Ron. Maybe he just needed something to pour himself into. He hardly had time for it, but it might just be enough to keep him so busy that he wouldn't have time to think about the dirt. He wondered if he could ask his father about it or if his father would shoot him down altogether. He said he could rely on him, but that did not necessarily mean trust. Harry needed this to keep him from needing the dirt, and if his father said no... then he'd be put into a position where he would feel like he had to disobey. No, better to not ask him about this at all.

He fell asleep dreaming of becoming a bird with electric blue wings and a large tail, though Sirius and Remus followed him back into his dreams, where they continued their condescending argument about Harry and his failures.

It was a few days before an owl dropped a small brown book with a leather cover into Harry's lap in the Great Hall. Harry eagerly opened it and found a note tucked inside from Remus. ‘Be careful' it warned. Ron and Hermione had already left for class and so had most of his other friends, and this was the start of Harry's free period so he sat and read without having to worry about people asking what he was doing.

He had never been good with transfiguration, and as he flipped through the pages of the book, it looked like he would have to get better before he could ever manage to turn into an animal. There were complicated diagrams, wand movements, encantations, and astronomical calculations (that he had no idea how to work). The books pages were also riddled with warnings and cautionary tales of witches and wizards who had turned into animals only to be killed by hunters or family members, or who had transformed and decided they liked to live that way better, and then their mind had not let them wander back to their original body. Maybe that's why Remus had chosen to send this book, Harry thought wryly, because it had so many warnings.

Deciding to skip the calculations and other difficult looking pages, Harry skipped to the last chapter that talked about a person's qualities and desires determining what kind of animal they would become. Sly deceitful people often became reptiles, sneaky untrustworty people became insects (which would explain Rita Skeeter), courageous people became a great number of different animals (surprisingly not many of which were ferocious, but were mostly regal, like Eagles and dragons), people who were timid became small creatures so they could hide more easily, people who were afraid became large foreboding creatures... the list went on and on. Harry tried to predict what he might become if he could ever figure out the process... he liked the thought of having wings so he could fly, and an eagle or some type of hawk didn't sound all that bad. He also thought about a lion or something large and fearsome, but thought that that kind of animal might not have many uses if he were ever out in the Muggle world. Professor McGonagall turned into a cat... not fearsome, but she could slip by almost anywhere unnoticed. Harry always paid attention when a cat came into the common room, to see if it was her checking up on them or one of the student's pets... not that he'd ever caught her at it but he bet she had done it many times.

He flipped back to the transfiguration portion of the book and settled in for what was sure to be a long, taxing read, and by dinner he didn't feel any closer to achieving his goal than he had when the book had fallen into his lap. He also wasn't feeling any craving while reading however, so he still considered it a win for the time being.

* * *

"I didn't realize you had become so studious."

Harry looked up to find his father. He was sitting in the corridor with his back against the wall Saturday morning about a week after the book had arrived. He closed it and shrugged. "It's like candy only I don't get fat."

"Hm. Anything interesting?"

He shrugged again. "Not really. Just transfiguration. I'm pretty bad in Professor McGonagall's class so I figure I should get better. It says certain transfigurations are easier under certain star formations at certain times of the month or year, or even times of the night. That makes no sense. It has a bunch of mumbo jumbo calculations to figure it all out."

"Is there a certain transfiguration you wish to achieve?"

Harry shook his head. "No but wouldn't that suck having to do a calculation every time you have to turn something into something else? And then you have to wait for the right time too."

"There are some transfigurations that are only possible during certain astronomical event, but those are far beyond anything taught here... those are transfigurations on a large scale, things that Professor McGonagall might not even try. For the most part the calculations are to help beginners figure out when to make their first attempt. The astronomical events... such as certain constellations being in the sky, help the magic flow easier. Once a person has learned the transfiguration, learned how to wield and shape the magic, they often no longer need the aid of such events."

"Huh. I don't think that will help me in class," Harry said.

"It is information you will be required to know for your NEWTS."

He raised his brows. "Hermione will be upset then, to find out I know something ahead of time before she does," he clarified.

His father invited him down to tea and he went with him. They played chess and Harry tucked the book into his backpack so his father wouldn't get curious and try to take a closer look.

"Were you any good in transfiguration?" Harry asked as he lost a second time. He didn't mind losing to his father as much as he did Ron becuase he felt like he was learning logic and strategy just watching him play. Ron was all about tactics and drawing the opponents attention away from his real plan. Harry had learned all of Ron's moves so he got frustrated when he lost to his friend, but that was not yet the case with his father.

"I received a passing grade, but potions, defense, and arithmancy were my best subjects."

Harry looked up, interested. "You took arithmancy?"

"Yes. So did your mother. She was the one that was good at transfiguration. She tutored me in it when I was failing."

Harry pretended to think for a moment and then asked, "Was she an animagus then? Or a metamorphmagus?"

"No. She was good in transfiguration but her favorite classes were astronomy and arithmancy. She didn't have much interest in transfiguration beyond it's practical applications."

Astronomy and arithmancy... hm. "What good is arithmancy?"

"You asked me earlier about calculating for astronomical events... astronomy, arithmancy, transfiguration, and sometimes runes, are all tied closely together. Arithmancy aside from being very complicated math is the study of numbers and predicting the future with numbers. A good arithmancer can calculate when the necessary astronomical event will occur for their transfigurations."

Harry nodded. Hermione had prattled on about Arithmancy in third year but had stopped when he and Ron had been caught on several occasions not paying attention.

"Aren't there just callendars for that?"

"There are, but they change every year. Arithmancers make and sell them, though they are very expensive. On Diagonalley you can expect to pay at least six galleons for a one month callendar."

"A bit steep," Harry said.

"Not many take up arithmancy after school."

Harry asked his father a few more questions about his mother, arithmancy, and even Runes before leaving his father's quarters. He was really starting to enjoy spending time there with him (especially if he could learn more about his mother).

As he wandered back up through the castle (it was too snowy to go out today), he thought about arithmancy and runes. For the first time since he'd learned he was going to Hogwarts, he was interested in them. As a sixth year he supposed it was too late to get into one of the classes as an elective, even though he did have a free period before dinner every day. He supposed he would continue to fill up that free period with Professor Potter's Animagus Class until he managed it. Until he did manage though, he needed Hermione's help to figure out some arithmancy so he could know when to try his transformation.

Hermione it turned out was more than pleased to start spewing out random information about arithmancy again (much to Ron's dismay), but Harry sat and soaked up as much of the information as he could, even taking notes. Ginny sat with them as Hermione tried to teach him the basics. Ginny wasn't in arithmancy but she was in Runes, and Harry asked if she would teach him the basics of that some time in the near future. When she agreed and her hand suddenly brushed his he blushed. They'd already held hands several times, but they still weren't 'officially dating'. Maybe after his transformation into some majestic creature, he would impress her and get up the courage to ask her. He only hoped he didn't turn into a snake, or bug, or rat. The Weasley's had had enough of rats.

Harry learned from Hermione at night after dinner each night, then went to his room and stayed up late trying to muddle his way through complex calculations. He had checked out a book with a cover that was disintegrating about astronomy and what events were good for certain transfigurations. The closest he could find to an animagus transfiguration was turning large animals into other animals though. Perhaps animaguses hadn't been discovered when this book had been written. The book had an old event calendar in the back, and Harry had to do his calculations from there. He went through nearly forty sheets of parchment by his second week of arithmancy lessons with Hermione before he thought he'd come up with two correct dates. November 23 and December 16th. That was two chances to try to transform. November 23rd was three days away.

Harry tucked the page with the two dates into the back of his animagus book and used a piece of spello-tape to hold it in place, and then went to the overly difficult part of the book about the actual transformation itself. He wished Hermione could help him with this. Apparently there were many ways to trasnform into an animagus. To some people it came naturally. Just as there were metamorphmagus' who could transform their human features at will, there were anamorphmagus' who could transform from one animal to another based on how they were feeling. Harry thought it would be interesting if a person could turn into a cat with wings who could breath fire, or something like that, but apparently that wasn't how it worked according to the book. When someone was a anamorphmagus they could turn into three or even four complete animals. The book mentioned a man from ancient times who could turn into seven creatures, but said most anamorphmagus' only managed two or three at best. And like a regular animagus, they did not get to choose what those two or three animals were.

Harry read and re-read the chapter on transformation in every spare moment he got until the 23rd. He would need a place to try his transformation, but he hadn't yet thought of a suitable place. The room of requirement came to mind, but what if he had wings? He really wanted to fly. He also thought of the North tower, but with tonight's alignment of the plannets and an asteroid, the first, second, and third year astronomy classes would be up there with Professor Sinistra. Harry also did not like the idea of trying to fly from the North tower in a brand new form. What if he couldn't figure out how to use his new wings?

Because it was going to be a clear night, Harry decided on going out into the grounds and around the side of the castle where he hoped no one would look out a window and see him. There was still a foot of snow on the ground, and it was windy, but at least no new snow would be falling on him.

At nine o'clock, just past curfew, Harry snuck out the front doors and crept around the side of the castle to a place with no windows on the lower floors. This side of the castle faced the forbidden forest and he was aware, as hairs prickled on the back of his neck, that at any moment something could come out and get him. He tried to push the thought to the back of his mind and pulled the small book from his coat pocket. Eyes scanning the places he'd underlined, Harry put the book back in his pocket and closed his eyes. He'd decided to try the pure thought pure energy method, a name he'd given to the least complicated of the major methods described. The idea was that if he concentrated hard enough, he could let his energy transform his body from the inside out. He wasn't exactly sure how to do that if he couldn't concentrate on what kind of animal to become, but he tried anyway. Harry tried to let everything else fall away from him, the cold, the hair standing up on the back of his neck, the dampness of his boots and socks, and let himself just be. He stood there for thirty or more minutes like that, and in the end felt rather foolish when nothing had happened. Maybe he'd done his calculations wrong?

He closed his eyes and tried again, but the longer he stood there, the harder it became to concentrate as he grew colder and his hands and face grew more numb. As he traipsed back around to the front doors and snuck inside, he thought, 'just as well. If I had transformed into something large I might have ripped up my new clothes.' Making a mental note to wear clothing he didn't like as much next time, he went back to his room and lay on his bed staring at the dark ceiling. What had gone wrong? He supposed he'd have another 23 days to think about it before the next date came up.

Harry laid off of the studying for a few days until Ginny asked him if he'd like to study Runes. He had lost interest in it but he did want to spend time with her so he agreed and they took up a corner of the common room by the fire for a few nights. There was a large chair, just big enough for them both to sit in side by side and not feel 'too' smooshed, but Harry enjoyed it. Ginny's tutoring was not like Hermione's. Hermione was all business when it came to learning, but Ginny was casual and she joked with him and made him blush while they were learning, especially when she put her head on his shoulder as she pointed out runes in her book and had him repeat them back to her.

"This one means love," she said.

His cheeks turned red. "Love," he repeated. "What's this one?"

"It says love too but it means something different."

"What?"

She looked around. "I think Ron would write to mum if he heard me tell you."

"Oh," Harry was certain his cheeks were so hot at this point that she would feel the heat comming off of them.

"Here," she said on their fourth night studying. "I found this in the library and thought you might like to look at it." She handed him yet another book that's cover looked as though it had seen better days.

"What is it?" he asked. The title was in runes.

"It's a book about transfiguration. I don't know what all is in it. I found it in the library today. I've seen you reading transfiguration books, so I thought this would be good practice for runes."

"Thank you."

"You can borrow my Runish language book and my Rune dictionary with it."

He held out his hand for the small book she had.

"What, this? This isn't the dictionary."

"It's not?"

"No, it's the first year Rune's text. Stay here." She got up and suddenly the seat next to him felt empty and that half of his body she'd been up against felt cold. She disappeared into the door leading to the girls' dormitory and came back a few minutes later with an enormous book that looked as though she really had to work to carry it for it's weight.

"That's the dictionary?" He oggled at it's size.

"This is the dictionary," she said. "It's more like an encyclopedia." She set it in his lap and he sank into the chair under it's weight. It must have weighed ten pounds.

"I'll show you how to use it before you go to bed."

As it turned out, the dictionary wasn't an ordinary book. All Harry had to do was write the rune he wanted on a scrap of parchment and touch it to an open page, and the book would flip pages until it came to the page the rune he wanted was on. The rune would glow for a moment, just long enough for him to locate it and look at it's description. It was slow going, and Harry didn't know why he was wasting his time translating the book when he didn't think it would help him at all, but he did. Impressing Ginny was still at the back of his mind.

After an hour he felt like giving up, but decided to stick with it for ten more minutes and translate the rest of the table of contents. It was when he got to 'chapter ten' in the contents that he paused and stared at what he had translated. 'Ten - The Seventh Animagus Transformation'. Chapter ten had a seventh method for transforming. The book Remus had sent him only had six.

He flipped to the start of the tenth chapter and skipped translating the title, before quickly scribbling out the first few runes and shoving them into the dictionary. Before he was finally ready for bed, at about midnight, he had the first two pages and his eyes hungrily raced from word to word.

'The seventh animagus transformation is actually the original, eldest method. There is a reason why people transform by type. Sixteen types of transformations there are, based not only on personality but on feelings. The seventh and most basic principle of animagus transformation is based on instinctive baser feelings. This is why young children sometimes transform. As the story goes, the first to transform was a boy being chased by a wild animal. With no one to help he decided to protect himself, and there turned into an eagle, who pecked the eyes out of the beast before flying away to safety. Many have transformed based on need, not desire. Instinct outweighs concentration. The important thing is to be aware that you can transform, so that in time of need, you can let your energy take hold to transform you. A wise wizard pays attention to how he allows his energy to take over, so that he can transform again at will. Many have managed a transformation once based on instinct alone, but have never been able to transform again thereafter.'

Harry stared at his untidy handwriting for long, silent moments, Ron snoring somewhere behind him. This was it. He felt it. This was clearer than anything in the book Remus had given him. The only problem was, he'd been in danger a lot of times before and never transformed. He hadn't exactly been aware of the principles of it either though, or that it was possible. Harry wondered then about the boy who turned to an eagle. Had he been aware? Maybe the answers lay in the untranslated portion of the chapter. Harry was far too tired to keep going this night though. His eyes hurt from looking at the strange runes and a headache was setting in along with cravings for the dirt to take away his stress. As he lay in bed he fought with himself over the cravings. One part of him said, 'celebrate your discovery with the dirt,' and the other said 'just go to sleep.' In the end the rational part won out and he fell into a strange dream, where he stood on the North tower preparing to put himself in instinct mode by leaping, only to realize he might not turn into an animal with wings at all.

* * *

Harry continued his lessons with Ginny for two more nights before he told her he didn't want to do runes anymore but that he'd still like to spend time with her. She was the one to blush this time and they sat in the large chair next to each other talking about other school related things as well as Quidditch.

Over the next few days he also translated the last few pages of the runic chapter on animagus transformation and started to plan a 'safe' way to put himself into instinct mode. He would go back outside at night he decided, and try there. He had felt his skin prickle at the edge of the forest, and thought that he might be able to get away with going back to the same spot and not actually venturing into the forest to feel freaked out enough to transform.

Christmas break wasn't far off and on December thirteenth Harry knew that most of the students would be leaving on the train for home. Aside from the astronomical events, the sixteenth would be the perfect time to sneak out and try.

Ron and Hermione were going to stay for Christmas that year, but Mrs. Weasley insisted that Ginny go home. Draco was staying as well since his mother was still missing and his father still imprisoned in Azkaban. Harry's father had talked about him and Draco both coming to his quarters to spend Christmas day, but because Gryffindor was going to be fairly empty, Harry also managed to get him to agree to letting Ron and Hermione come. Harry was excited for Christmas, and for the sixteenth to arrive so he could try his transformation again. He was determined to make it happen, in part becuase if he didn't it would mean more pages filled with tedious calculations that he didn't feel half qualified to make. Maybe after he transformed he could show his father how smart he'd been by figuring it all out for himself. He'd sit there in the living room Christmas morning next to his friends, and turn into an Eagle or a hawk on the couch. He'd never had much desire to prove that he was smart, but he felt rather accomplished now with all that he had learned, and wanted to show that he was capable.

Finally the sixteenth rolled around. He and his friends were the only ones left in Gryffindor, most of Slythern and Ravenclaw had cleared out, and only fifteen or twenty Hufflepuff's remained. With less students in the castle Harry was confident that Filch would be taking a break from partrolling, so he strolled casually down through the castle at a quarter to seven and right out the front doors. It wasn't past curfew, but the Entrance Hall had been empty and he'd escaped unnoticed.

Back to his spot on the side of the castle, Harry ventured even closer to the Forbidden Forrest until it was only twenty feet away. He closed his eyes and felt the hairs on the back of his neck prickle again as they had before. He was definitely uncomfortable there in the darkness, but after ten minutes, nothing had happened. He opened his eyes. He had really thought this would work. He stared into the darkness of the trees until the shadows seemed to close in on themselves as he tried to think of what to do. He supposed he could try one of the other ways in the book Remus had given him, but he hadn't understood half of it and some of those ways included taking potions with expensive or hard to come by ingredients.

Harry didn't know how long he stood there thinking, and staring into the woods unseeingly, but finally his eyes came back into focus and he found himself staring at a pair of glowing red eyes in the shadows.

Eyes widening Harry stared for a moment more, just to be certain his eyes weren't playing tricks on him and he really was seeing eyes. Then a low growl emanated from the space between the trees and Harry turned and ran. He didn't know what was in there, and he didn't want to find out and take the chance that he couldn't defend himself with his wand. As he ran and tripped in the snow, picking himself up again, his mind flickered for one horrifying mo­­­ment to Sirius. It might be Sirius, he thought. He could have been in there watching me, waiting to come and get me. He ran harder and as his heart pounded, something strange began to happen. He felt like something warm was flowing out of him, through his fingers, from his feet, out of his head and his stomach and shoulders. He looked and for the briefest moment he could swear he could see sparkling golden light coming off of his arms and hands, and then he tripped and was on the ground on all fours again.

Harry shook his head and tried to stand up but all he managed to do was fall flat on his face in the snow. "Damn," is what he tried to say, becuase the snow was cold on his bare skin, but what came out was a grunt. He tried "what?" but what met his ears was another grunt. Oh. He paused and looked behind him. He expected to see his legs and feet, but what he found were fur and enormous paws. "What am I?" More grunts and animal noises that he couldn't identify. He tried to reach up to feel for his glasses, but his hand... front paw, didn't seem to want to move that way.

Struggling, he got up and found that he was fairly comfortable on all fours. He took an experimental step forward and then another and fell on his face again. He was going to have to get coordinated if he expected to get anywhere, especially if that monster was still after him. He turned to look but there was nothing in the darkness behind him. Snow started to drift down from the dark sky, and Harry wondered that he didn't feel cold. He tried to shrug his shoulders but what ended up happening was that the fur on his back bristled and he didn't like the feeling at all.

After a few minutes of experimentation he had coordinated himself to take a step with his left front foot and right back foot, and then the opposite. It was strange but it worked. He wondered if he could run this way and tried, but for a third time ended up on the ground. How do dogs and cats run with four legs, he thought. They don't do it like this, he decided. Back on all fours again he leapt forward with both front feet, letting both back feet stay airborn for a moment, and then he landed. He did it again and agian and was moving quickly now. He sniffed the air, becuase that was what felt natural and was surprised to find he could smell a good deal more than he could in his human form. He could smell Hagrid's fresh rock cakes for instance, and smoke from a tobacco pipe, and the stench from something far off that was definitely dead and decaying. Thinking that he'd rather not investigate the dead thing, he turned and went back towards the castle.

I'd better transform back now, he thought. Whatever I am the fat lady will never let me in like this. He blinked several times and expected something to happen just because he wanted to, and then huffed, hot air coming out through his nostrils as he snorted. He didn't know how to turn back. He hadn't paid attention when he'd transformed either... he'd been too taken with the energy that had been coming from him. Had it tingled? Had it hurt? Did it feel good? He didn't know, and panic began to set in. Instinct would transform you to an animal, but would it transform you back to a human?

Running again, Harry went straight up the snow covered front steps and used his head to push on the front doors. They opened and he was surprised that they didn't seem all that heavy like they normally did. He shook to get the snow off of him and then froze as he heard several high pitched screams.

Head snapping to the right in the direction of the screams, he found several Hufflepuff girls, eyes wide and panicking as they backed up against a wall.

"Get away!" one shouted.

"Hey, calm down," Harry said, forgetting that it wasn't his voice that was going to come out, and they screamed at his strange noises. He sniffed the air in their direction, not knowing what else to do and was surprised to find that he could actually smell their fear. It was a mixture of sweat and something else mingling with their perfume. Funny, he hadn't noticed that Hufflepuff girls wore perfume before. Finally one of them seemed to come to her senses and ran into their corridor and the others followed, still screaming.

"Well," Harry said, his gruff animal sound coming out again.

There was a shout of surprise then and his head snapped the other way to find his father with his wand drawn on the threshold of the dungeon stairwell. Their eyes locked and Harry wondered how he could get across that he needed help.

He took a few steps forward and his father raised his wand and shouted a strong stunning spell, which Harry ducked.

"Cut that out!" he shouted and what came out was a fearsome roar. Draco appeared just behind Severus but stayed put, looking pale.

"GET BACK!" Severus shouted at Harry, and Harry didn't like his tone. He sniffed the air again and could again smell fear, but this time it was mingled with something else again, something he hadn't smelled from the girls.

"I want help," Harry said, but of course nobody understood. Severus took a step forward and made a stabbing motion with his wand, as if it would scare Harry away, but he didnt budge. Just look at the great mess you've gotten yourself into now, he scoleded himself internally.

"Come on, it's me, don't I have a scar on my forhead or anything?"

"BACK!" Severus shouted again with another stabbing motion and another uncertain step forward. Draco was still in the entrance to the dungeons.

"No!" Harry shouted and it came out a short loud roar. He shook his head in great long swipes from side to side and said, "No no no!"

"Professor wait!"

Just as Severus looked about to fire off a curse or another stunning charm, Hermione had called out from the top of the stairs. Severus' eyes didn't leave Harry's beastly form, whatever it was.

"Now is not the time Miss Granger!"

There was a slight shake to the man's voice and he wondered that he'd never heard it there before... maybe it was his new ears. What was he? Some kind of big dog? He was scary whatever he was, but he was feeling more scared than they could be right now he was certain. What if he got stuck like this permanently? What if they did stun him and dumped him deep in the forest with that red eyed thing?

"I don't think it's wild," she said. "It looks scared."

"Wild animals are the worst to be around when scared," Severus said, wand still aimed at him and eyes not leaving his. He walked sideways to put himself in front of the stairwell and Harry's eyes followed him.

"I mean, I think it's tame."

"And you can tell how?"

"I dont know. The way it looks at you. The noises... it's like it's trying to talk to you."

"Yeah it's saying, feed me!" Draco called irritated from his spot in the safety of the stairwell.

"Watch." She came down the stairwell and Harry looked at her.

"You can understand, can't you?"

Harry gave a nod but his head went sideways and the nod felt weird, diagonal somehow.

"Sit down."

Harry plopped his behind unceremoniously onto the cold stone floor with a thump. He felt... blubberous and strange sitting like this with all four limbs in front of him. He took a moment to look down to see if he could see his underside and sniggered at his overlarge... parts. Maybe being stuck this way wasn't so bad. The snigger came out strange though and when he looked up, his father and Hermione were staring at him. Draco had taken a step out of the stairwell as well.

"Speak to us," Hermione commanded, and Harry grunted and made all sorts of noises.

"Are you a student?" she asked.

"Well what do you think?" he said sarcastically and was surprised when it came out sounding as sarcastic as he thought it should. He supposed the way he tilted his head back and forth helped and wondered if he could roll his eyes in this form. What was he anyway?

"Professor," Hermione said, finally coming to the bottom stair. "I think I know who this is."

Severus turned his head slightly so he could still watch Harry but also acknowledge that he was listening, and she said quietly, "I think it's Harry."

"Thanks for ratting me out Hermione," he said, but then remembered that he did want their help.

Severus finally lowered his wand and Draco whistled from Harry's left, finally coming back into his view and standing next to Hermione.

"Harry."

"Dad." It was a snort.

He narrowed his eyes and swept Harry's hairy body, from his forehead down to his parts. He made a full circle and then came back to stand in front of him.

"You're in a rather large ammount of trouble."

"I know."

"Did you know he was trying to become an animagus?" Severus asked, irritated as he suddenly turned on Hermione.

"No Professor. But he's been interested in Transfiguration lately, and Arithmancy and even Runes. And he's got that marking on his head and the dark rings around his eyes... it looks like his glasses."

"It's not exactly a lightning bolt," Draco said, coming a little closer to Harry now and staring up at his forehead. "Just a darker brown patch of hair."

"Is anybody going to tell me what I am?"

Severus looked up at him. "I do not know how you did this," he said. "It will take some time to undo it. Miss Granger, go and fetch Professor McGonagall."

"Yes sir," she said, and she hurried up the stairs.

Severus took a few steps back to better see Harry in his full form again and though he stood there silently, Draco walked up and patted Harry's side hard twice like one would do a dog.

"Went and turned yourself into a big ugly bear. Good one Potter."

"A bear, is that what I am?" He looked down. His hair wasn't black or dark brown like a bear. It wasn't exactly white either. It was light brown. What kind of bear was light brown?

"An ursid," Severus said, arms crossed and fingers tapping on one shoulder.

"A what?" Draco asked.

"A hybrid bear. Perhpas Grizzly and Polar bear, I am uncertain."

A hybrid? He looked at himself again. What did that make him? A pizzly bear? That sounded lame.

"Maybe he's been cursed," Draco tried, but Severus shook his head.

"No. He has done this to himself."

At that moment Professor McGonagall appeared at the top of the stairs with Hermione, and aside from the fact that she was trying to look stern, she really looked quite pleased.

"A bear Mr. Potter. Really. I had no idea you had this in you."

"Me either," he said, still disappointed in the Pizzly side of himself.

Severus gave her a sharp look but she waved him away.

"You should be proud Severus. He's the only student in school who can transform. The last student that managed in school was ten years ago and he was only a bug."

"Obviously he cannot turn back, or he would not have come into the castle looking like this."

"It's not uncommon, you know that. We only have to talk him through it."

"How long will that take?" Harry asked and Draco said the same thing at the same time. They gave each other a look.

"A few minutes, or a few hours," McGonagall said.

In the end, Draco and Hermione ended up sitting on the bottom step talking to each other and growing bored while Severus and Minerva talked to Harry for an hour and a half trying to help him transform back, talking him through how it should 'feel' to transform back and how it was different than transforming into his animal self. Finally Harry sat (thankfully fully clothed and with his glasses back on) on the stone floor, feeling exhausted and rather exasperated but also glad.

"Fifty points to Gryffindor," McGonagall said. "For acheiving a beyond NEWT level transformation. I'm very proud of you Mr. Potter."

"And detention," Severus said, sounding tired. "For doing dangerous magic on your own."

"Would you buy that it was an accident?"

"Not with the books you've been reading."

"Well it sort of was," Harry said. "I went out to try the seventh form but I ended up getting a little more freaked out that I meant to... something with red eyes was staring at me from the forest trees and I ran and..." he stoped at Severus' half bemused look that said he was only digging himself in deeper.

"I think you'd better stay with me tonight," Severus said, pulling Harry to his feet. McGonagall chuckled and patted him on the back and motioned for Hermione to follow her up towards Gryffindor tower becuase of the late hour. It was nearing midnight.

As Harry lay in bed that night, glad to be back in his own body, cravings returning to him in full and exhaustion trying hard to overtake him, he thought about his little adventure. In the whole time he was in his... pizzly form, or whatever it was, he hadn't craved the dirt once. Maybe after he got over the shock and excitement of the night, he'd try again.