I Don't Want to be a Hero - Ch. 12

"Come. Let us sit on the sofa, Harry. The floor is too much for this adult." Professor Snape drew the child, who still held like a Tenacious Tentacula to his robes, onto the sofa with him. Snape uncurled the boy's fingers from his robe, and then did a Vanishing Charm over the area of his frock coat the boy had cried upon. Harry touched the now clean area with awe.

"This is how I thought magic was," Harry mused. His features dropped back into fear. His eyes, looking up at Snape, pleaded with the man to ‘make things right’. “Everybody says I’m famous because...” he gingerly touched the scar on his forehead, “because they think I killed HIM. I really didn’t, sir.”

Snape smirked and caught the small fingers in his own. "You in no way are a murderer, Harry. As a babe you could never have killed an adult with magic. You have not the power HE had."

Harry frowned tautly. "Well... that crazy witch said I did, and all the kids here at Hogwarts think I did, too. Even the Headmaster said I killed Voldy."

It was Snape's turn to frown mildly. "Voldy?"

"Voldy," assured Harry. "Ron kept wincing as I said his whole name and I think saying He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named is stupid so I'm calling him Voldy." Harry looked up earnestly at his teacher. "Is that okay, sir?"

"Voldy, hm..." mused Snape. "I must admit that the nickname does not bother me. However, had you said his full name I would have flinched because it hurts me when you say it."

Harry was aghast. "No! I'm sorry! Why does his name hurt you, sir?" Harry actually felt a touch sick to his stomach thinking that the professor he was becoming fond of would get hurt every time Voldy's real name was spoken aloud.

"Let me show you." Harry watched with puzzled fascination as Professor Snape unbuttoned the cuff of his left sleeve, and then unbuttoned the cuff of the white, inner shirt. The wizard then rolled up both sleeves, turned his forearm so the skin revealed a dirty grey mark in the form of a skull entwined by a snake. Harry's fingers hovered over the strange mark, and Snape gently pulled the hand of the little boy away before his fingers could connect with the mark.

"What is it?" gasped Harry very softly, and eyes wide with wonder.

"When I was a young, and terribly foolish man I sold my soul to a devil, the Dark Lord that you call Voldy. To show the world that I belonged to him, the Dark Lord burnt his mark into me. It is known as Morsmordre - the Dark Mark of the Death Eaters."

"And this hurts you?" asked Harry with pain for the man beside him in his voice.

Snape felt the snapping, creaking, breaking of old ice around his heart as he heard the child's pain, for him, in his voice. It touched a past so enwrapped in protection that he could not decipher all the emotions that were tumbling through him. He pushed those aside, and put all his attention on Harry. "It does hurt me, Harry. Like a flame to my soul every time the Dark Lord's name is spoken. It is how I know that even though his body is gone his evil spirit lingers."

Harry's mouth became an "O" of sudden understanding. "That's why the Headmaster thinks I'll kill Voldy because he's not really dead!" Harry became agitated, and then swiftly angry. "So he's not dead but everyone thinks I killed him but I was a baby and a baby can't do something like that and you got proof he's not dead but an evil spirit and everyone thinks I'm going to kill him because I got all these super magic POW powers and..."

"Harry! Take a breath!" ordered Professor Snape. "You are hysterical!"

"I-I-I don't get it... I don't... it doesn't make sense.... I'm sorry!" Harry breathed in and did his best to slow his heart and to push his anger away. He knew he was babbling, and not making sense. He was not even making sense to himself, and that was really dumb.

Snape watched as Harry lowered his body and lay his head upon his thigh. The boy tried his best to slow his breathing. To help him Snape lay his cool fingers on the back of the boy's neck.

Harry, his cheek on Professor Snape's thigh, sighed heavily as the wizard himself sighed, and carded his fingers through the child's hair. After several long minutes in which both remained silent yet somehow content in that small moment, Harry's voice broke the silence with a soft plea, "Sir, can I go to sleep, now?"

Professor Snape nodded, although the boy could not see him. Gently he removed himself from under Harry, Summoned a pillow and blanket for the sofa, and then he Summoned the potion they had brewed that afternoon.

Harry plumped up the down pillow, and draped the blanket over himself. When his teacher leaned down to help him take his potion, Harry leaned back after wrapping a restraining hand over his teacher's hand as Snape held the potion. "You'll be here?" Harry's voice was infinitely small, yet hopeful. He had no memory of the night before last other than waking up tired.

Snape removed the child's glasses. "I shall be here the entire night, Harry. Get what sleep you can."

Harry downed the potion, then snuggled down into his pillow and blanket. "You need to sleep, too, sir." Harry yawned as the potion quickly drew him down into sleep.

Snape lay his fingers in the child's forehead. "I will. Do not worry, child."

In another moment Harry was asleep. The Potions Master went to his fireplace, threw Floo powder in, and called for the Headmaster. "Albus, my apologies for taking so long but would you mind coming through and bringing Harry's vault key."

"Of course, Severus. I shall be there momentarily." Minutes later Snape welcomed the Headmaster into his sitting room. Albus frowned as he saw the child he had expected to speak to asleep on the sofa. He directed a silent question at the younger wizard.

Professor Snape stood sentinel between Harry and the Headmaster as he replied, "When I returned I found Harry caught re-living the torture Bellatrix LeStrange put him through. Understandably, he was distraught. As he has a second, difficult night under the Cruciatus After-Effect Relief Potion, I felt it best to administer it now so he may have some rest before greeting the day tomorrow."

Albus nodded. "Yes, I do agree, Severus. I should still like to speak to Harry when it is possible."

"Tomorrow afternoon I should like to take the child to Gringotts to the Potter vault, and then to get a new wand, and some better clothing. Would you leave his vault key here, Albus? I shall not touch the key if that is what you wish."

The twinkle died in the Headmaster's eyes as his direction of the Slytherin failed. He looked down upon the sleeping child, and his lips thinned. Taking a small parchment envelope from a pocket of his robe, Albus handed over the vault key. Snape pocketed the envelope.

"Goodnight, Albus," dismissed the man in black.

The Headmaster approached the Floo, threw in the glittery black Floo powder, and just as he stepped into the green he ordered, bring Mr. Potter to my office when you have his wand, Severus. Good evening."

The green flames whooshed with the vanishment of the Headmaster. Snape sat down in his chair. He had delayed the Headmaster from meeting again with Harry for as long as possible so he knew that at some point his attempts would fail. Touching the envelope in his pocket, a thin grimace of a smile graced his lips. At least he would be able to restore the boy's rightful inheritance.

And, at that moment a moan of pain spiraled up from the child's diaphragm. He began to tremble, then the trembling became great shakes. Snape rose from his chair, erected a ward to keep Harry from falling off the sofa, and he then Summoned a small jar of Essence of Elderberry, Sage, and Yarrow. Expanding the sofa so he had room to sit beside the child the Potions Master began to stroke the soothing essence onto Harry's pulse points, and his forehead.