"Harry? Have you packed everything?", Severus asked, coming up the stairs. After receiving visits from Lupin almost every day, Harry had felt comfortable enough to agree and spend a weekend with his godfather. Lupin had told him he lived near a lake and would to teach him swimming and fishing if he wanted to. Harry had giving Severus such a blast of the puppy dog eyes that he just couldn't refuse. And he remembered from the memories of Vernon, the jealous look Harry had given Dudley on these occasions when Durlsey came home with him after such a father-son trip. It did irk Snape that it wasn't himself who would be teaching Harry, but he didn't mind too much as he wasn't proficient in both practices. And Lupin had given him such a gratefull smile that Severus believed him to be in his dept.

"Huh? Oh yeah" Harry answered hastily, shoving socks into his duffel bag. Snape frowned.

"Maybe I should have asked 'have you left anything?'", he said, glancing at the almost empty drawers in Harry's room, he saw the boy blush "I know I said 'pack for the school year', but Harry, you can leave things here."

He went and opened Harry's cupboard only to find Dudleys old cast offs there. Snape had offered to burn them when Harry had received his new clothes, but the boy had only silently shook his head. He turned to face Harry who was staring at the floor.

"Open your trunk for me, Harry.", Severus asked quietly

Harry complied and the trunk virtually jumped open, it was so filled up. Inside were all of Harry's new purchases: clothes, toys, even his clock, owl treats, Ophion's box, basically everything he valued. Snape sat down on the bed, unable to say anything.

"Sorry", Harry mumbled, his shoulders drooping "I'm just used to packing everything. I was afraid they'd..."

'burn it', Snape completed in his mind and closed his eyes to hide his rage from the child.

"I know you did it unconsciously, I don't take offense.", he offered and Harry looked up hopefully "I know it must be hard to understand, but this is your home, you are coming back here."

Snape gestured towards Dudley's elephant skin and said "and I'm not taking away your new things, you can dispose of that."

Harry looked uncomfortable with the idea. Even though he never wore them and had always hated them, he felt a certain security connected with those clothes. Besides his broom and Hedwig they were the only things that belonged to him and were not given by Snape. On the other hand, if Snape decided in a fit of insanity to destroy Harry's belongings while he was gone, he wouldn't mind loosing these. He felt ashamed of not being able to trust in Snape more after all he had done for him, but he couldn't change the way he felt.

Snape decided this was enough soul searching for one day and waved his wand. Some of the things flew out of the trunk and reclaimed their place in the room. Others arranged themselves neatly in the trunk. When he was satisfied with the results, Snape waved his wand at the duffel bag, which also lightened its load, including a silvery cloak.

"Harry...", Snape scolded while the cloak folded itself and flew into a shelf "What did I say about the cloak?"

"I know!", Harry answered, pouting "But I wanted to show Uncle Remus."

Severus felt a pang at hearing the loving title bestowed on the wolf, but ignored it "I dare say he's familiar with it."

Harry gave a sheepish grin but refrained from arguing.

"Come here, I wanted to give you something", Snape said and Harry came to stand in front of his knees, Severus took out a thin silver chain out of his pocket and showed it to Harry "This is a safety pendant, it alerts me if you're in danger. I'm going to be honest with you, it is normally only used for toddlers" Harry frowned at the green pendant hanging from the silver chain "but as you are prone to... stumble into danger, I'd like you to wear it at all times."

Snape conveniently forgot to mention that it would also give Harry a sense of security and a memento from his guardian, especially while he was having heaps of fun at Uncle Remus' place.

Harry nodded and took it, but didn't look too happy about it "Better keep it hidden from the other boys, though."

Snape grinned at that

"Ugh? Anyone home?" Lupin's voice drifted up towards them

"He's coming down in a moment.", Snape shouted and then turned back to Harry "Listen to Lupin while he's taking care of you, I don't want to hear any complaints. If you need anything, owl or floo me. Lupin will help you with that..."

"I know!", Harry interrupted, grinning "you sound so... Mrs. Weasley-ish!"

Snape cuffed the laughing boy lightly "Cheeky"

Harry threw the duffel bag over his shoulder and went to the door but stopped there. He then turned around, a determined expression on his face. Snape didn't know how to react when Harry simply wrapped his arms around his neck and naturally said "Goodbye, Papa"

It was only a moment, the next Harry had turned away again and was loudly jumping down the stairs. Snape sat stunned at Harry's daring, hugging him goodbye as if they had always done that. Calling him Papa as if he had never stopped saying it. He heard Lupin and the child floo away and one thought kept repeating itself in his mind 'I didn't even hug him back'. He still grinned smugly into the empty room when another thought hit him: Take that, Uncle Remus.

It had only been a few days that the evil little monster had left and Spinners End already felt dreary and sad again. Snape scowled into his morning tea, the boy and his godfather had happily announced that after the weekend they would like to spend more time together before he and Severus would leave for Hogwarts. Seeing Harry grin happily and his eyes twinkle to match Dumbledore's prevented him from ordering him back immediately. He allowed the child to stay with the wolf a little while longer...

He had plans today, he should concentrate on that. He had a full agenda planned for the Dursley's and that thought made his face break into an evil grin.

Just after Harry had left with Lupin, Snape had checked through Harry's things to see if he had missed packing something he needed. While he was tutting over a bag of dungbombs, one of them fell from his hand and rolled under the bed. A simple charm made it roll out again, but it wasn't alone. Along with it came a little box that Snape remembered he had bought for Harry. It was about the only thing Harry had asked for himself, when they went shopping and even though he was curious about it, he didn't pester the child, afraid he wouldn't ask for anything else. He picked it up and realized there was something in it. Had Harry put something inside and hidden the box under his bed? Snape frowned and shook his head. He really shouldn't look inside, it wasn't right. This was like looking into a diary. He placed the box back under the bed and kept arranging Harry's things.

The whole day he tried to distract himself from it and up until this very morning, several days later, he had been successful. But today he had broken and opened the little red box to be brought back to reality with a snap. Inside were a couple of old cookies, a muffin and a slice of stale nut bread. Snape stared at the items. Harry was hoarding food. He closed the box again and put it back under the bed, but kept kneeling on the floor instead of standing up.

Harry was still so insecure that he stacked food up in case Snape started to lock him up and starve him as well. He packed all his things in case Snape suddenly realized all of this was a bad plan and he'd rather abandon the boy. One of his hands reached up to cover his mouth. But dealing with the dread of the task of teaching Harry the meaning of family or accepting the fact of just how much this child had been damaged by his relatives – all of this was too much, so he settled for what he could do best: Rage, anger, hatred and the sweetest of them all: revenge.

That was what he was preparing himself to do today, so his mood was finally starting to lift when he opened the paper and stared at a picture of Sirius Orion Black. Snape blinked and tried to let the message sink in that anyone – let alone that idiot – could flee from Azkaban. Snape let the paper fall down on the table and practically sprung up.

"Fishers lodge", he screamed, throwing in the green powder and vanishing in flames. The effect of his arrival was destroyed by the fact that he lacked his dramatic robes and was standing in the middle of an empty living room in nothing but his pajamas "Harry?"

He heard chairs scraping from an adjoining room and soon both residents stuck their head into the living room. Lupin looked worried instantly

"What happened Severus?"

"Take your things, Harry, we're leaving."

"But what...?"

"Now!", Snape snapped and Harry flinched before running out of the room obediently

"What's going on?", Lupin asked again

"Haven't you read the papers, Lupin? Black escaped!"

Lupin paled at those words and looked speechless

"The wards around my home are stronger.", Snape explained and added in his mind 'And I don't trust you'

Harry was back in the room, his duffel bag over his shoulder, Snape beckoned him closer

"I'll be closing the floo connection to Spinners End, so say goodbye to your godfather. You'll see him again in school."

Harry dropped the bag and looked between both adults. He looked ready to argue but then just went to hug Lupin which surprised both men.

"You're always welcome in my office, whenever you need anything.", Lupin said softly, petting Harry's hair before letting go. Harry simply nodded before turning back to Snape with a sullen expression.

"Go through, I'll take your things.", Snape ordered and watched Harry wave to Lupin before vanishing in the flames. He turned to his colleague and he hesitated a moment "I'm sorry I had to interrupt like this."

"Don't worry.", Lupin said easily "I'll just live off that hug until I see him again."

Snape turned to see Lupin struggling to hold in his smile, Snape raised an eyebrow at that and smoothly said "Challenge accepted."

Back in his own living room Harry was nowhere to be seen "Harry?"

Snape went up and opened the door to Harry's room to find him sulking on the bed. He dropped the bag by the door and went to sit at the edge of the bed.

"Don't you want to know what this was about?"

Harry shrugged. Snape hated it when he did that.

"There's a prisoner that escaped from Azkaban."

"Don't care.", Harry mumbled into his cushion. Snape was getting irritated with this attitude real fast.

"Harry, face me.", when Harry didn't react, Snape roughly turned Harry on his back and tipped his chin up until he got a glare. At least they were making eye contact

"I didn't bring you here to ruin your time with Lupin. I brought you here for you own safety."

Harry huffed angrily "What do I care about any stupid prisoner from Azaban?"

"Azkaban.", Snape corrected automatically "You should care about him, he ran away for you."

At this a little interest peaked in those green eyes

"Sirius Black was connected to your parents death in a similar way that I was.", Snape explained and seeing he finally had Harry's full attention, began further back in the story "He was your fathers best friend, he was your parents' best man and was later named your sole godfather because Lupin couldn't take the honors for both occasions."

"Anti Werewolf laws.", Harry nodded

"Exactly. When I went and told Dumbledore about the Dark Lords plan to hunt your family he protected them in the safest possible way. He put a Fidelius Charm on your home. This charm works through binding a secret with someones soul. They bound the location of the Potters home to Sirius Blacks soul and he went and betrayed it to the Dark Lord the moment he had a chance."

Harry gasped a that, his eyes wide with shock "Why?"

Snape shook his head "He is the only one who could answer this. He ran when the Dark Lord fell that night, but was cornered by the last one of your fathers little gang of friends: Peter Pettigrew. Little Peter confronted Sirius but he was never anything in comparison to Black and he blew him up. Peter died together with twelve Muggles that day. Black's been at Azkaban, the wizard prison, ever since."

Harry sat on the bed, pale and shivering, staring into his lap. "What a bastard."

"Harry!", Snape scolded lightly, taking a blanket and draping it over the boys legs. Harry looked up, eyes shining with held back tears

"If it wasn't for him, they'd be alive.", he said with a heavy voice, Snape stared at those eyes, the last remaining connection to Lily. And then he realized: it wasn't just the eyes, it was the way he wrote his 'g', or his mischievous grin, that surprisingly had nothing in common with James' evil visage. It was the way the boy silently and deeply cared about the people around him. The way he showed in small gestures, that he was more Lily's son than James', at least to Severus. The way he put the right amount of sugar into Severus tea without asking, just like Lily had done in school every day. The way he lost in Scrabble every time and argued about every point or the way he felt fascinated with the untouched set of gobstones that his mother had once presented Severus with. It was these things, these little reminders of his very best friend, his first love, that made him jump his shadow and consolingly put a hand on Harry's shoulder

"I know."

"I wish he was dead. I wish I could kill him!", Harry ground out angrily rubbing at his stubborn eyes that wouldn't stop prickling.

"The best thing to honor your parents' sacrifice is to stay save, that's what they would want you to do. The ministry will find Black and put him back where he belongs."

Harry still had his jaw put in a way that made him look very stubborn but Snape let it go. He roughly ruffled up his hair and stood up "Come down and help me with dinner when you're ready, child."

"Yes, Papa.", Harry mumbled and even though he sounded dejected, Snape couldn't help but feel better at the last word. Harry was alive and safe. He was with him and he still liked him more than Lupin. And a darker side of him was satisfied that the anger Harry should feel at the role he had played in his parents death fell completely to Sirius. That felt a lot like poetic justice, he grinned to himself.

Harry didn't know what was happening outside of Spinners End because Snape had effectively locked them in. His broom never looked so sad, the sky never so cloudless and blue than in those days. He even begged Severus to go shopping, just to breath some fresh air.

"Alright you little pest!", Snape finally snapped after an hour of Harry's relentless nagging "We'll leave for Hogwarts tomorrow. You can break your neck on the Quidditch Pitch for all I care!"

Harry grinned "Oh, thanks, Da-, I mean Papa."

Snape looked at the child, who dutifully acted as if he hadn't almost slipped up, and decided again to ignore it. The kid was excited, nothing more, nothing less. And why did he even care? Papa or Dad – where was difference, really? Exactly, there was none. He should be glad, this was at least better than uncle, wasn't it?

"Well tidy up your dump upstairs.", he gruffly said "And I mean Hegwig's cage and Ophion's terrarium as well, young man!"

"Kay!", Harry screamed and ran up the stairs taking two at once. Snape shook his head at him and went to the telephone. He dialed the assisted living quarters' number, when someone finally picked up, he said

"Yes, I'd like to speak to Mr. Snape please."

"Oh, Severus, right? Its me, Sharon.", one of the nurses said

"Yes, hello Sharon.", Snape answered impatiently "Could I speak to my father?"

"Err... This is not a good time, Severus.", she said with what was obviously supposed to be a calming tone

"Is everything alright? I wanted to talk to him before I leave for work. I won't be able to call until the Christmas holidays..."

"Ah, yes, you work at that prestige school as a chemistry teacher, right? Tobias is so proud of you, he never talks about anything else. Except your cute son, of course. Never knew you had a child..."

"Sharon...", he interrupted "My father, please?"

"Oh... I would love to... its just...", she dropped her voice "Its one of his bad days."

Snape swallowed thickly, understanding in a moment what that meant, he stiffened "Oh... well... How has he been recently?"

Sharon hesitated again "I'm sorry, Severus, but he hasn't been doing so well, lately."

Snape felt taken aback by this. Every time he had talked to his father over the summer, he had sounded just dandy. That was why he decided to spent more quality time with Harry instead of bringing Tobias home, like always.

"Is it...", he cleared his thought "He wasn't disappointed, was he?"

"For not staying with you?", Sharon asked "No, he didn't take it too hard. He was rather excited about the pictures you gave him. He kept showing everyone his grandson."

Snape didn't know why, but he felt incredibly guilty at that.

"Severus.", Sharon said "I deal with old people all day and there are a lot of them who just wait for death around here. No one cares, no one visits in months. You keep in contact, he reads every one of your letters so often and after a call from you, he just beams all day. You are doing your best, so don't dare feel guilty. He'll come through, he always does."

Snape nodded to himself and took a deep breath "Thanks, Sharon, I appreciate it, really."

"Don't mention it.", she said brightly and they hung up after that

"Who's Sharon?", Harry asked, emerging from the stairs with a bag of something in his hand.

"My girlfriend.", Snape said with a completely straight face and Harry actually dropped the bag, which contained the disgusting inside of Hedwig's cage. Severus kept the smile from his face while vanishing the mess "She works where Tobias lives. That's how we met."

"You're having me on.", Harry decided, not completely convinced

"If you say so.", Snape said, turning his back "Be a good boy and check if Ophion's box is ready as well."

Harry stared after Snape unsure if he should laugh or feel mortified.

The next day Harry had released Hedwig into the sky, her cage and the terrarium had been sent on via floo into Snape's office – Snape looking tense until the connection was closed again – and they were now standing in the back garden with Harry's duffel bag and broom as company. Snape checked the clock again and then said

"Ready to go?"

Harry nodded vigorously "Can we walk through Hogsmeade?"

Snape raised an eyebrow at the last minute request "Are you scared I'll ban you from Hogsmeade visits?"

Harry shrugged noncommittally

"Come here."

Harry stepped closer, wrapping his arms around Snape's middle and enjoying the hug he received for the apparition. They materialized in the forest and walked a bit until they entered Hogsmeade. Harry looked around with big green eyes and pointed everything out, that Snape had seen a million times already. He did snort at the comment about the "Haunted house", but didn't explain.

"Oh can we go into Derwish and Banges?"

"Not while I have a say in this.", Snape declined "I'd rather go into Honeydukes than..."

"OK.", Harry said, interpreting Snape's hypothetical words in his own best interest. Snape let it slide, because he couldn't help but feel a bit proud of the child. That was probably the reason he bought him a jar of feast cookies, that taste of different Hogwarts feasts, like Christmas or Halloween. Harry was fascinated by them but Snape mainly thought about the little box under the boys bed that was now traveling in his duffel bag. If he was hoarding, he should at least put in things that couldn't go bad. And the box of chocolate frogs he had purchased alongside the dark chocolate for himself was only meant as a reward if the child behaved. He wasn't spoiling him, not him...

They walked up to the castle in a rather good mood, Harry munching on a welcoming feast cookie.

"Harry, I'd like it if you would write to Tobias now and again.", Snape finally said "I think he would enjoy it immensely."

Harry smiled up at him "Of course!"

Snape smiled down and wanted to thank him when cold wrapped himself around him and he heard his mothers last long drawn breaths on her death bed.

"Take care of him.", she rasped "Take care of your father, Sevvy."

He snapped out of it immediately and conjured a Patronus that took the form of a deer, as it chased away the cloaked figures of darkness. As his vision cleared again, he saw Harry lying on the ground and when his senses came back, he could feel his own safety pendant glowing warmly on his chest.

"Harry, wake up, Harry.", he knelt beside him and shook him

"Mum?", Harry murmured quietly and then his eyes fluttered and he came back to himself in a panic "What happened? Where am I?"

"Shh.", Snape soothed "Its alright, you're okay. Lets go, we need to get inside the castle wards."

Snape helped Harry on his feet and gave him a chocolate frog. He then steered him up the walk firmly, half dragging him in his hurry to get into safety. Before they even reached the entry to the grounds he waved his wand in an arch and it opened wide. He shoved Harry through and then turned to face it, putting several charm on to lock it. He imagined he saw a pair of yellow eyes watching him, but ignored it. There were a lot of creatures in the forest that didn't only come out after dark. He turned back to his charge who had finished the chocolate frog but was sitting in a heap on the grass.

"Is everything alright?", Snape asked, offering a hand to help Harry up. The child looked up, his eyes looking suspiciously wet

"I heard her. My mum. I heard her pleading with him for my life."

Snape felt shivers running down his spine, he took Harry by his arms and hoisted him up, leaning the child against his side

"You're shivering, you were exposed to the dementor for a rather long time. Shall I conjure a stretcher?"

Harry shook his head "I can walk."

"You cannot.", Snape decided after a few shaky steps and unceremoniously picked Harry up princess style. Harry was too weak to even protest and only laid his head on Snape's shoulder, secretly glad to be held. Snape felt alarmed by this reaction to a degree that made him jog to the castle. His pendant had stopped heating but he couldn't be sure if the child was really alright. Did the pendant cover the after effects of dementor attacks? He'd need to check.

Harry in his dazed state realized too late were his guardian was headed. Before he could protest they were already through the infirmary doors

"Dear god, what is it now?", Pomfrey snapped annoyed, when she saw them "The school year hasn't even started yet!"

"We ran into a dementor", Snape explained in between Harry's protestations of "I'm alright, I feel a lot better!"

Snape deposited the child onto a bed, where he sat with pink cheeks.

"Chocolate?", Pomfrey asked shortly

"Already had some.", Snape answered, while she buzzed around Harry

"He really does seem alright now, a bit off color but he'll recover soon. I guess he just needed a bit of snuggling..."

"I did not!", Harry said indignantly at the same time as Snape said "I carried him, woman. I wasn't snuggling."

"I am sure.", Madam Pomfrey said dryly, hardly hiding her smirk and turning her back to them.

"Insufferable woman.", Snape grumbled as Harry huffed "Snuggling - as if!"

But then Snape turned to Harry "You take this as a challenge, don't you?"

"Huh?", Harry asked lamely, color returning to his face slowly

"This whole guardianship, you take the 'guardian' part as a challenge – every chance you get, you put yourself in danger.", Snape raised an eyebrow to underline the statement. Harry first wanted to protest and argue, but then decided on a different route and grinned

"Well, you haven't even broken a sweat, so I guess I'll have to try harder."

He laughed when Severus tried to pinch his side in response.

Harry was soaring through the air on his broomstick trying hard to imitate a quidditch move he had seen in Flying with the Cannons. In their better days the Cannons keeper George Owell had been one of the best in Great Britain and had one signature move. He was a bulky sort of guy that wouldn't have looked amiss in a body builder competition, except for his orange Cannons uniform. His stare alone was said to be so awe inspiring that his opponents often just dropped the Quaffel in fear – or so Julius Dehoffe wrote. Harry found his collision move to be a good idea to adapt to seeking. Owell had sometimes just flown right at the Chasers who got nervous and made a mistake. Once or twice he even rammed into them.

Being a rather thin thirteen year old Harry didn't plan to ram into the opposing seeker, but he could see himself distracting him by flying right at him, for example if the Snitch was behind him. The key was to put on a poker face and lock eyes with the other player. As Harry couldn't train that part until his team mates were there, he tried flying as close to one of the goal posts as possible and then swerve to the side at the last moment. If he had the move down, he could practice the psychological trick later.

Thus he was flying at a goal post, when he saw something black in the corner of his eye, he swerved left and saw a great black dog sitting in the stands, watching him intently. It barked loudly when he looked at it. Harry felt like this dog was weirdly intelligent the way it kept his gaze locked with him and sat absolutely still. A chill went down his spine, when it gave a little snort. Feeling like he was being ridiculous he decided to leave the pitch and flew for Hagrid's cabin, where he was tending to his back Garden.

He landed and received a warm welcome from the ground keeper and Fang

"Say Hagrid, did you see a big black dog around here?", Harry asked casually, Hagrid thought about it and shook his head

"Not since 'bout one'a two decade's ago."

Harry drew his brows together and asked "Then do you know any magical creature that looks like a dog and lives in the forest?"

"Never seen 'em in the forest, but the Grimm's supposed to look like a black dog..."

"Harry?", Severus interrupted from a few yards away "do you want to see the crucial steps?"

Harry remembered that Severus had been brewing Veritaserum and hastily followed him back into the dungeons. Excited to finally see the brewing steps that made Veritaserum the most effective truth potion, he discarded his Nimbus rather coldly, which made Snape smile a little. He helped Harry up onto the work space and felt in perfect harmony again, with the child watching him brew.

When he finished, Harry gave an involuntary wide yawn.

"You can't stay awake during brewing Veritaserum, can you?", Snape joked and Harry rubbed his eye tiredly

"No, I just flew all day...", Harry protested

Snape helped him down and led him into the living room

"Papa...", Harry asked slowly "What's the Grimm?"

Snape raised an eyebrow at that and then said derisively "One of the reasons you are not taking divination this year."

Harry just looked questioningly at him

"Its a mythical creature that is said to be the darkest of omens. One who sees it is expected to drop dead.", Snape said it in such a careless, bored tone, that Harry just had to feel amused by it rather than worried "And it is total Humbug. Why, did you see a black dog?"

"Yes, I actually did. It was standing in the stands and looking at me...", Harry didn't want to sound paranoid, so he didn't tell Snape about the weird sensation of being watched and how threatened he had felt from the dog

"How did you hear about the Grimm?", Snape asked, bringing tea things

"I asked Hagrid about it, because I had never seen any other dog on the grounds than Fang."

"Hmm", Snape poured tea for them both, then gave Harry his cup "I wanted to talk to you about something."

"Yeah?", Harry asked, unconcerned, now that his fear of the Grimm had been appeased. It was only a shaggy big dog, nothing to be afraid of.

"Your room here, don't you want to decorate it?"

Harry blinked up at Snape. Decorate? What did he mean? Put flowers in or something? When Harry didn't answer, Snape elaborated "I can't believe I'm actually suggesting it, but you could put up some Gryffindor banners, pictures of your friends, posters of your Quidditch team..."

"Oh!", Harry said, expression clearing up on understanding what Snape expected "I didn't think I could... actually I never even thought about it."

"I imagined as much.", Snape sighed "Well, think about it."

Harry shrugged "It doesn't matter anyways, I'm staying in Gryffindor tower."

"For most of the time."

"Huh?", Harry looked up alarmed and Snape raised an eyebrow at him

"During holidays we will go back to Spinners End.", he explained and was relieved to see Harry smile at that "And if you're grounded, you'll stay here during the weekends."

"So I'm supposed to decorate the room for when I'm grounded...?", Harry asked without much enthusiasm

"No.", Snape immediately answered, then looked hard pressed to find any other reason "I expect you'll stay here when we brew together and it gets late... or if there is another reason."

"Like...?"

"We'll see.", Snape talked himself out of the question and shoved some biscuits at Harry. For some reason the biscuits seemed to remind Snape of something and he gave them a glare. Coming to a decision, he looked up with the guarded expression, Harry had learned to feel weary about. It usually meant the Dursley's were going to come up. He was kind of right "I noticed something in your room."

Harry didn't answer, he just waited for the bomb to explode. He took a biscuit in his hand, so he could bite it at a strategical time to avoid answering awkward questions.

"An elf contacted me when he found... food in one of your drawers."

Harry choked on the biscuit he had bit into, Snape conjured a glass of water and gave it to him, ignoring the still hot tea in front of Harry.

"You put them there?"

Duh. "Yeah."

"Why?"

"To have something to snack on.", Harry lied smoothly. Snape stared at him and then said

"Do you often snack on stale bread?"

Harry blinked and then felt his cheeks redden in anger "That was not in my drawer! That was in the box under my bed – what did you do? Search my room? Do you routinely go through my underwear? What do you think, that I steal from you?"

Snape didn't seem to be fazed at all by Harry's raised voice, he calmly answered "You may remember that you did indeed steal from me once." That sobered Harry up quite a bit "But no, that was not why I looked inside. You are an abused and neglected child. Even though I value your privacy, I value your safety more."

"What did you think was in there, poison?", Harry asked venomously

"No, but you live with a Potions Master, it is not unheard of that certain ingredients can be used as drugs." This had not been the reason behind Snape's looking into the box, he knew. But it had occurred to him later and this was how he had justified it to himself

"Great.", Harry spat "I think you'd realize if I stole stuff from your cupboard and smoked it in my room or something."

"Probably.", Snape admitted "It could just as well have been a knife or razor blades or..."

"You think I cut myself?", Harry said, horrified

"It would not be... Harry, listen. Healing from abuse and neglect is difficult and it can spiral out of control. You could be releasing frustration that way, how would I know if I didn't check?"

Harry didn't know why, but he felt incredibly betrayed and tears sprang to his eyes that he furiously tried to suppress "You think I'm that mental?"

"No, I don't. But I have to make sure."

"Well I'm not!", Harry screamed, frustrated with the situation and feeling hurt by Snape's assumptions more than he imagined possible. He was doing well, he was happy – why would Snape think he would do those things?

"Hoarding food because deep down you still feel so unsure about yourself and our relationship that you cannot even trust me to feed you at all times – what do you call that?"

Harry felt his nose block up from holding back tears and bit his lip in anger. He glared at Snape trying to get a hold of himself. He didn't know when it had happened, but he had sprung up and was breathing rather hard. Snape slowly stood up too, his movements deliberate.

"Harry, I know you're doing well, extremely well for the circumstances, but I fear for you..."

"You think I might snap at some point and start cutting myself and smoking gillyweed or some other crap.", Harry said coldly, challenging Snape with his gaze

"Language, Harry."

"Fuck the fucking language!", Harry screamed suddenly "And do you know why I don't trust you? Why I don't decorate my room, why I take all my stuff when I leave, why I can't throw away Dudley's clothes or hide food in my room? Because you were a bastard to me for a year. A whole year you treated me like crap, like the Dursleys! And then suddenly you turn nice and then I trusted that, I trusted you. I trusted you enough to tell you about them. And then what? I realize it was all just a dream, a charm that forced you.", Harry was crying by now, irritatedly wiping at his face and stepping away from Snape "And then you come back and take me away. And this is supposed to be all? Everything is alright now between us, just like that? Well no, it doesn't work like this. I don't trust you. Of course I don't."

Snape just stood there, entirely lost and hurt by those words. He didn't know what to do, what to say. He just stared at Harry and then sat back down, taking a few deep breaths to calm himself. Harry stood there, waiting for the storm, waiting for screaming, maybe even hitting. But nothing came. Snape just sat there, stunned and paralyzed. Fed up with it all, Harry turned to his room and slammed the door shut. He threw himself on his bed and brooded.