Potions and Snitches
Snape and Harry Gen Fanfiction Archive

Kill the Fear

Severus sighed and his shoulders slumped. He dropped his gaze, his hands not leaving Harry's shoulders.

"I appreciate you telling me," he finally said.

"Why didn't you tell anyone before?" Draco asked.

"Who, would believe me?" Harry was tired, emotionally and physically. "You both hated me."

"What about the other part of the Golden Trio?" Draco asked, almost smirking a little. Harry returned the expression.

"I couldn't tell them. They thought I was crazy that year. Hearing voices and everything, you know."

"What about your Head of House?" Severus pitched in. Harry looked up at his Professor. Severus could see the hurt and anger in his eyes, but what bothered him more was the acceptance.

"I knew she wouldn't believe me."

"How?"

"At the end of our first year, we went to McGonagall and told her that someone was after the stone. She didn't believe us. Why would she believe me again if I told her that? She would just take the teacher's side." Severus nodded his understanding.

"If it means anything to you," he began casually, "she did bring your concerns to the rest of us, even if she dismissed them to your face. Also, I doubt anyone would have taken Lockhart's side on anything. Even if I did hate you at the time, I also hated Lockhart. You could have played that card to me. If I could have gotten rid of him mid-year, I would have been the logical candidate as a replacement, and you knew I coveted the Defense position." Severus sighed. He didn't want to make Harry feel guilty. "But it's all in the past."

"Harry," Draco began cautiously, "can I ask - will you say - how bad?" Draco almost winced once he had the words out. Then, immediately, "Sorry, you don't have to say - I mean - yeah. Never mind."

Severus looked at Draco. Severus knew what the boy wanted to ask, and honestly, he wanted to know the same thing. Right now, even though he was tired, he was itching to go back to the Headmaster and let him know of the many more ways he had failed with his weapon.

Harry looked at Draco. With the stumbling of his words, he knew what was being asked of him. Harry knew that, deep down, he trusted everyone that was with him, but this was something that he couldn't look at them while saying. So with a deep sigh, inspecting his hands on his lap, he prepared to tell Professor Snape and Draco what happened.

"It was the first detention," Harry started. "It started with him wanting me to help with his fan mail. He...he said he was going to get us some tea. He got up from where he was and left. I thought it was kind of weird, because he could have just called a house elf, but I thought maybe he had some in his office. He was gone, I don't know, maybe a few minutes. I was trying not to gag at the mushy letters I was reading. Then…" Severus noticed that Harry was balling up his fists, tightly. Before he could hurt himself, Severus opened up the tight fists and slowly rubbed the fingernail imprints in the boy's palms. Harry risked a grateful glance up at Snape.

"I guess he walked up behind me. I didn't know he was there until I felt him. He put his hands on my shoulders. He started rubbing them. He...I tried...he went from my shoulders to my neck." Harry visibly shivered. Harry looked up at his professor. His eyes swimming with tears. "I...I was so scared. I didn't know what he was going to do. He started rubbing my chest…he said how pretty I was...by then, I was frozen to the chair. I couldn't move."

"Potter," Severus quietly called him. "Did he do more to you?" Harry shook his head. Severus let out a small breath of relief that a situation that dangerous hadn't escalated any further.

"How did you get out of that room?" Severus asked. Draco sat, looking at Harry, wishing he could take away his pain.

"I heard the basilisk. I guess he panicked, when I said I heard something, and he backed away from me." Harry sighed. "I couldn't get out of that room fast enough. While I was walking away, I could still hear the voice. I ran into Hermione and Ron, then we saw the writing on the wall and Mrs. Norris." For the second time since Harry started talking, he looked at his Professor like a wounded animal. "You asked where I was. I wanted so badly to tell you, and then Lockhart showed up and when he started talking again, I just wanted to scream that he scared me."

"So why didn't you?" Draco asked.

"I was hearing voices. Hermione and Ron were looking at me like I was crazy. Like I made the whole thing up. Maybe I misunderstood what Lockhart did." Severus snorted derisively.

"I doubt that you misunderstood anything," Severus sneered, his voice dripping acid. "Teachers are instructed, explicitly, to be exceptionally careful when dealing with students, like to never, ever, touch them when there are no witnesses. You're sure nothing else happened?" Severus arched an eyebrow suspiciously.

"Nothing," Harry said decisively, confidently. Severus nodded once in reply. He sat back in his armchair and crossed his arms, brooding.

"I'll have to check with my Slytherins to make sure 'nothing' happened to them as well," he commented offhandedly. "Draco, did you hear any rumors?"

"No, sir," Draco said immediately. "You know I would have told you if I had."

"Hmm, of course," Severus dismissed.

"So," Draco said, with a false cheerfulness, "what are the plans? Professor, aren't you going to be putting yourself in danger to protect me if I stay with you?"

"Naturally," Severus commented. "Don't go getting any stupidly Gryffindor ideas - ," Severus paused and glanced at Harry, " - no offense intended - to throw yourself at your enemies to save me. It won't work, and I'll still be in quite a bit of hot water, so don't even try."

"Harry, what are you going to do?" Draco asked.

"I...I thought I was going to be...," Harry looked from Draco back to his professor expectantly. The looks he was getting from the two occupants in his bed made him re-think what was about to happen. Nothing was changing. Everything was going to stay the same. Harry put his head back down.

"You thought you were going to be what?" Severus prompted casually.

"With you," Harry's head was still down and his voice was low. "But you're leaving me." Severus sighed and rolled his eyes.

"I would have assumed you wanted to return to your dorm, now that life should be more settled for you," Severus indicated. "It would be extremely dangerous for you to be seen in our company, you realize. I'm not sure I should allow you to risk that. If I'm supposed to look out for you, that means looking out for your best interests as well. Draco currently has a price on his head from the Death Eaters, and I can't imagine that my association with him does anything to put me in good stead with the Dark Lord either. To a degree, we're both time bombs, and it's simply a matter of time until our pasts catch up to us. Do you really want to be around when those bombs go off?"

"I'm safer with you than apart," Harry explained. "Why can't we just stay together?"

"Potter," Severus voice was stern. "Act your age." Harry's head snapped up and looked at his professor as if he'd been slapped.

"Yes, sir, sorry, sir," Harry slid down in the bed and turned away from Snape. Severus snorted, darkly amused.

"No need to be so offended," he said. "Here's what I will do for you - stay in your dorm, but you may come visit in my chambers when you wish. I am neither your Head of House nor do I have any legal authority over you. I have no recourse to interfere with your current arrangements."

"I understand, sir," Harry dejectedly said. "Thank you, sir." Harry continued to look away and didn't make any motion.

"Harry," Draco called out.

"It's okay, Draco," Harry said still sounding miserable. "I understand. I'll see you around." Severus stood up and nodded for Draco to do the same. They walked out of the infirmary. Harry heard the door close and couldn't stop the tears that started to flow from his eyes.

Suddenly, the door opened again, and rushed footsteps came echoing through the infirmary, causing Harry to look up, despite his slightly wet face.

"Well?" Draco prompted when he stopped at the foot of Harry's bed. "Are you coming, or not? You know Professor Snape doesn't like waiting."

Harry smiled through the remnants of his tears. Never in his wildest dreams did he think that Draco would return, much less that his professor was indeed waiting for him. Him. As quickly as he could, Harry pushed the covers off, got up, and the two teens rushed out of the infirmary, side by side.


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