“Severus! Severus, did you... OH! Harry! Oh, thank heavens!” gasped Minerva who was half running towards them.
The child who had until now remained calm began squirming in his grasp, eager to wiggle herself free and get down but Severus held her firmly in place.
“Oh no! Is she alright? What happened!” cried Minerva.
“She will live. She cut her foot trying to flee without shoes. I found her in a tree,” growled Severus.
He was pleased Minerva cared about the girl but she didn't need to fuss so. Poppy could take care of it. Speaking of which where was Poppy?
“Harry, what were you thinking?” asked McGonagall as she walked around Severus to face her.
“Surely, she made that perfectly clear,” snapped Severus before the girl had a chance to answer.
He continued on his path with McGonagall following.
“Harry, I don't intend to...” began Minerva.
“Professor Snape already explained that me,” said the girl and once again attempted to wiggle free.
Severus rolled his eyes and mentally readied himself as they came up to the house. When they arrived the door was open and he could hear Poppy's voice coming from within. She was standing in the hallway with Dumbledore.
“I didn't find any trace of her!”
“Then we will hope the others had more luck,” said the old man thoughtfully.
“We did,” sneered Severus as he walked through the front door and carefully put the girl down.
“Oh, Harry! I was so worried!” cried Poppy and rushed over to her.
“She has injured her foot,” said Snape matter-of-factly.
The girl kept her eyes to the floor as Poppy frowned and began simultaneously scolding her for being so foolish and comforting her for having suffered so. The witch ushered her into the kitchen to tend to the cut. As they passed the Headmaster he called out to the girl but she ignored him completely. It was with a great deal of satisfaction the Severus observed the sorrow in the old man's eyes. Minerva closed the front door.
“Headmaster, there is one more thing I would like to discuss with you,” said Severus, his face completely void of any emotion.
“Oh?” inquired Dumbledore who seemed to have been deep in thought.
“I understand that she will return here next summer but is it necessary for her to stay for the remainder of this summer?”
“Do you have some place you believe she should be?” said the Headmaster.
The serious tone was still in his voice and it took everything Severus had in him to remain a blank mask under the man's gaze.
“You have just witnessed how emotionally distressed she is,” Minerva cut in. “We should keep her with us until she is more stable.”
“In other words you would take her to Hogwarts?” Dumbledore pointed out. “Did I not just say...”
“Only for the rest of the summer. Perhaps she might even visit with friends. She will need some time to come to terms with everything. You know her relatives will only add wood to the fire.”
“Allowing her to leave now would be counterproductive, Severus. She needs to think of this place as her home. Taking her away from here immediately after she has begged me to do so would only make her think I might actually consider doing so permanently.”
“We will need to sort out her identity. I sincerely hope you intend to let her have a say in those discussions and unless you really prefer having such meeting in a muggle home I am sure you will agree that we will all be much more comfortable at the castle,” continued Severus.
“Even so, I would have her stay at least another month. If we need her we may call upon her.”
“She will run away. You have already seen her do it. What if the next time we cannot find her? What if someone else finds her first? I can promise you this, Headmaster, she truly hates you. You will not have her loyalty if you proceed to alienate her this way.”
The old man seemed to consider this. Severus held his breath and silently prayed for a miracle. He and Minerva needed to be patient and figure this out but he knew he couldn't possibly perform his best if he was going to constantly worry that the girl had either run away or had been crushed to death by her cousin. He didn't understand it. He didn't understand why it meant so much to him now but it did.
“Three days,” said Dumbledore.
“But Albus!” protested McGonagall.
“Three days. Then you may bring her. She will stay here long enough to calm down. I insist upon this so don't you two start fighting me again.”
Severus nodded. It wasn't the best possible outcome but the fact that he had managed to get him to agree was amazing enough in itself. Three days. He could work with that. He turned and exchanged looks with Minerva.
“I will take my leave now. I will expect you all back in an hour. One hour,” said the Headmaster and gave both of his staffmembers a pointed look. “Severus, I will discuss the letters with you then.”
“Very well, Albus,” said Minerva sullenly. “We will say our goodbyes.”
Severus simply gave a slight nod to the Headmaster and turned to enter the kitchen. The old man could see himself out. Severus knew very well that their success largely depended on not pushing the man too far, too quickly but he already knew they were outraged and so Severus felt no obligation to be polite to the Headmaster. Behind him he could hear Minerva following him to the door. Severus entered the kitchen with a frown on his face that deepened when the first sound he heard upon entering was the girl whimpering. She was sitting on the kitchentable. Her stockings had been removed and Poppy was holding her foot and waving her wand over it, mumbling spells.
“Ai, stop it! That hurts!” whined the girl but Poppy continued to hold the foot in an unnatural angle so she could see better.
“Would you rather have an open wound? Running away without shoes! Can you not go two weeks without making a foolish stunt, you little dunderhead?” sneered Snape, letting more of his aggression towards the Headmaster seep into his voice than he intended.
“Severus!” chided Poppy.
The girl looked up at him with wide eyes but quickly returned her attention to her foot as Poppy finally let it go. Severus took a deep breath and walked over to the two of them.
“The Headmaster has left,” he told everyone and no one. “He wishes that you remain here for another three days. Afterwards we have permission to bring you to Hogwarts.”
Harry stared at the man in front of her. Three days? Just three days and they would take her away? If it was that easy why had he made it sound so difficult earlier? She was really going away? No! There had to be a catch! Why did she have to wait for three days? Harry had her suspicions. So she would let them leave and then they wouldn't come back. She would be left here waiting and even if he spoke the truth she had heard Dumbledore herself and he was pretty firm on the whole 'not leaving Privet Drive' thing.
“Three days? He agreed to that?” asked Pomfrey as she threw the stockings in the bin.
“He did,” said McGonagall as she walked into the room. “But he still very much intends to send her back next year!”
“Is there anything I can do?” inquired Pomfrey as she turned to face the other adults.
“Certainly,” confirmed Snape.
“Harry, we are going to come and see you every day! I promise,” said McGonagall as she walked over to Harry.
Harry narrowed her eyes and carefully jumped off the kitchen counter – taking great care to land on her good foot. They would come and see her? Perhaps they really meant it this time? She was really going back to Hogwarts? Not long ago she had sworn she would never go there again but in truth she really wanted nothing more. Hogwarts was beginning to feel very much like home. Her objection had only been because they were there. She studied the three adults in front of her. She knew Snape felt some sort of obligation towards her. She wasn't really sure why Pomfrey would care. Even if she had expected the opposite she was overjoyed that McGonagall cared. When Snape had told her about their thoughts all she could think was: Why do you care? What's in it for you? She was more willing to trust McGonagall. True, she hadn't proven to be much help in the past but Harry respected the woman above all other adults. She was her Head of House!
Harry felt a sinking feeling in her stomach. She was her Head of House. For now. Snape had said he'd get her moved and Harry hadn't objected at the playground because she hadn't dared provoke him out there. She stood there and tried putting weight on her recently healed foot. It was a little sore but otherwise fine.
“Professor?” she whispered and looked up at McGonagall.
Pomfrey was busy interrogating Snape as to what had happened during his stay there.
“Yes, Harry?” smiled McGonagall.
“Do... I don't really have to be a Slytherin, do I?” Harry said hopefully.
McGonagall paused.
“I don't know, Harry. The Headmaster agreed to it. I would prefer to keep you certainly but if it will help you I must allow it.”
“But I don't want to!” said Harry, no longer whispering.
The two other adults looked up when they heard her raise her voice. McGonagall put her hand on Harry's shoulder.
“I know. Harry, I don't know exactly what will happen yet. We must go in a moment but I will come and see you tomorrow. Hopefully I will have more to tell you,” she replied.
Harry nodded. She knew she could hardly ask for more. In fact, did McGonagall not allow her to listen in earlier? She hadn't considered that. Harry suddenly felt no doubt that McGonagall would share anything important with her. Maybe this was like what the professors had done with the Headmaster? Had they not simply agreed with him but claimed they would fight him later? Perhaps she should say nothing more of it for now and fight it when they time came. When she had thought of some good arguments.
“You promise to come?” said Harry, smiling for the first time that evening.
“I do,” nodded McGonagall.
“We should ward her room,” said Pomfrey.
“Indeed, I will go speak to Petunia about feeding her,” added Snape.
“Come along, Harry,” said McGonagall and Harry followed her and Pomfrey upstairs.
The witches began waving their wands over Harry's bedroom door. They were mumbling incantations Harry had never heard before.
“There! Walk inside,” said Pomfrey and gently pushed Harry towards it.
As she entered she felt a strange sensation. It disappeared as soon as she was inside. She reached out and placed her hand in the door opening and instantly felt it on her hand.
“What is it?” she asked with fascination in her eyes.
“A bit of warding combined with a muggle repellent spell,” smirked McGonagall. “You relatives can no longer enter this room.”
“Really?” said Harry she kept playing with the wards, pulling her hands in and out of the strange forcefield.
“You have bloodwards around this house too as you know, only you cannot feel those,” informed Pomfrey.
“Thank you!”
That was all Harry could say. She could have used something like this ages ago but to have it now was better than not having it at all.
“We will be going now, Harry, but I'll see you tomorrow,” said McGonagall.
“Goodbye professor! Goodbye Madam Pomfrey,” said Harry.
She could have followed them to the door but she was so delighted with the wards and she would like to be behind them once the professors had left the house. The women nodded and wished her goodnight before they walked down the stairs. Harry heard the front door shut behind them. She was alone now. Alone with the Dursleys but she didn't feel that way. McGonagall would come and see her tomorrow. It was one night. She could manage that.
Severus was waiting in the front yard when the witches came outside. He had spend his last minutes in the house threatening the Dursleys with fire and ice and the devil himself if they didn't take care of the girl to the best of their ability over the next three days. He still didn't feel comfortable with leaving her here. He knew the girl hadn't told Minerva everything there was to know but he also knew they couldn't force her to. Albus Dumbledore was waiting for them and Severus was eager to to speak to the old man. He needed to know about Lily's letters! The Headmaster claimed to have known nothing but was that really so? And if Dumbledore had been the one to receive the letters why did he not deliver them? True, Severus was a deatheater at the time but after he had switched sides Dumbledore had never mentioned them.
“Are you ready?” inquired Severus and the two ladies nodded.
Together they proceeded out of the front yard and onto the pavement. As soon as they set foot on the pavement Severus felt a strange sensation as though something was moving just behind him. He swirled around to find nothing. His colleagues looked equally alarmed.
“Did you feel that?” shrieked Pomfrey.
Severus' eyes narrowed. It couldn't be. No, he surely would not have... He raised his wand and checked the wards. Then his eyes widened in shock. He reached out his hand and immediately felt resistance. It was strong, powerful, undeniable.
“I cannot believe it,” whispered Minerva who had followed Severus' example.
“What is it?” asked Poppy.
“We are locked out,” hissed Severus between clenched teeth.
“Why would he do this?” said Minerva, shaking her head in disbelief.
“You mean...?” gasped Poppy.
“We are no longer able to walk past the bloodwards,” confirmed Severus.
The Headmaster was sitting behind his desk watching the three staffmembers. Poppy and Minerva had both taken a seat in the visitorchairs but Severus couldn't sit down. He was torn between pacing and shouting at the man but he knew neither would help them. He was absolutely furious. How dare he lock them out? Of course he likely knew one of them would visit the girl and attempted to prevent it. Why? Did he really need her to feel so disconnected from the magical world? Severus had to admit that it would likely work. If the girl felt abandoned there, any hope of being rescued would soon fail her. But could he not see how angry and bitter this would make her? He knew everything about it. How dark your mind could get when you felt abandoned and powerless. When no one seemed to care about you. When you lost the only light in your life.
“Severus, calm down,” said the old man to the younger and oddly completely blank-faced man.
Severus scowled at Dumbledore and crossed his arms. He wanted answers now. No, he demanded them.
“Did Lily leave letters intended for me with you?”
He hadn't meant to be this direct but he wanted it confirmed once and for all.
“She did,” said Dumbledore with sorrowful eyes. “And before any of you jump to conclusions, let me say I never saw the content of either of those letters.”
“You expect me to believe...” hissed Severus.
“Severus!” interrupted the Headmaster and silenced him with a wave of his hand. “The letters are spelled to only be opened by you. Of course I could have broken it if I had wished to but I wouldn't so betray Lily.”
“Betray her? You did betray her! She was calling for help and you promised to deliver those letters!” roared Severus, causing Minerva to jump.
“You do not understand. Please, sit down and let me explain,” said the Headmaster completely unaffected.
“Perhaps you might also explain what you did to the wards,” frowned Minerva.
“All in good time.”
The old man reached into the bottom drawer in his desk and seemed to be rummaging though quite a lot of papers before he finally produced two envelopes. He placed them upon the desk and Severus quickly stepped closer to study them. He only needed to take one look at his own name scribbled upon the front on them to recognize Lily's handwriting. He instantly reached out for them but Dumbledore placed a protective hand upon them.
“Severus, before you read these, I need you to understand something. When Lily came to me I knew you to be within the Dark Lord's ranks. You must understand she came to me completely out of sorts. She seemed anxious, possible paranoid to me. I hadn't seen her in quite a while. James had told me she suffered from postpartum depression and when I saw her I had no reason to doubt that. She handed me the first letter and begged me to somehow have it delivered to you. I was surprised to say the least as I had been under the assumption that the two of you hadn't spoken since you left school. I naturally questioned her but she refused to tell me why she wished to contact you.”
“I remember being told she had been taken excellent care of. Imagine my surprise to hear she had given birth without a healer present!” said Poppy.
“I can well imagine,” continued Dumbledore but did not otherwise address Poppy's comment. “I thought it might be a spontaneous desire to see you and accepted the first letter. I did not attempt to contact you as I was sure she would reconsider or forget about it herself. I had no desire to bring her into contact with you, Severus, because at the time you were the enemy and I would not let her endanger herself by speaking to you.”
“I would never hurt Lily! You know I never would! Did I ever give you any reason to believe otherwise?” hissed Severus.
“If not you then your associates certainly would. Let me ask you this, Severus, if Lily had come to you and begged you to put her in contact with Lucius Malfoy with no explanation would you let her?”
“That is in no way the same! How dare you compare...”
“Yes, I know, but I'm afraid I do not have a proper analogy. My point is I would not risk her like that. Of course when she arrived with her second letter I could no longer deny her seriousness. I began to suspect... Well, I knew how close you had once been, I knew that is was likely the reason she wished to see you. I couldn't be sure of course but she seemed so eager to contact you that I had to consider the possibility of her defecting.”
“Lily? Albus, what are you saying? Lily risked her life countless times for the cause!” cried Minerva in outrage.
“So did Sirius Black,” Severus spat because he realized he was supporting Dumbledore's argument.
“People have done stranger things for love, Minerva,” said the Headmaster. “I tried to dissuade her of contacting you and admitted to not sending the letter but she would neither explain herself nor give up so I informed her that the reason I could not deliver the letter was because I had been informed that Severus was dead. I attempted to convince her that I had only concealed the death from her so she wouldn't be hurt. She refused to believe me, saying that it couldn't be so. She handed me another letter and told me that if you turned out alive I should deliver it. I promised to do so if it would give her some peace of mind. I was very worried and I contacted James. He told me her depression had worsened but that he and his friends were taking care of her the best they could. I suggested letting her see a healer but James assured me Lily needed to be near the baby. Of course the last time I saw her here she confronted me about the letters and I was most surprised to find her furious.”
“James kept her away from the rest of us, how would she have discovered the truth?” asked Minerva.
“It seems the culprit was Sirius Black,” replied the Headmaster. “He spotted you when he followed Lucius Malfoy after the Cullings attack.”
Severus swallowed. He had not personally been part of the attack on that muggle family but he had rescued Lucius when they were attacked by the Order. Lucius had been badly hurt at the time and Severus had apparated him away to a safer location. He had been so preoccupied with keeping Malfoy conscious even Black could have managed to sneak up on him. It was really rather embarrassing.
“Apparently he let it slip during a conversation at the Potter home and not long thereafter I had a furious Lily in my office demanding to know whether the letters had been delivered. I then informed her that I neither could nor would deliver them as long as I considered it a risk to her. This, you will find is my part in this whole mess.”
Severus closed his eyes and exhaled. He was furious still but he had to admit he would likely have done the same in the Headmaster place. No, that wasn't entirely true. He would likely have been less moral and obtained the information by force if he really believed it was about Lily's life and death. Of course Legillimens was not socially acceptable and nothing screamed 'I don't trust you' quite as much. He was happy to know Dumbledore was above it when it came to Lily. He might have seen... Severus didn't want to think about that.
“With that in mind I have no objection to you opening these. They are for you after all,” said the Headmaster and gently pushed the letters towards Severus.
He reached out with a slightly trembling hand and pick up the first letter. It glowed slightly when his fingers made contact with it and Severus carefully opened it. This appeared to be the first letter. It contained what Petunia had already informed him it would in roughly the same wording. The others were clearly curious but he put the letter back in the envelope and pocketed it before reaching for the other one.
I really hope you get this! They told me you were dead
but I couldn't believe it! I need to speak
to you! Please, James has gone absolutely
crazy! I thought he would get over it
but I'm frightened, Sev, you should see
what he did to our daughter! I know you said
you would not leave them. That you couldn't
but please, Sev, if you ever loved me – help us!
I know you might not believe me but she
really is ours. I know you must be angry with me.
I understand. I tried to trick you but I know you
are a good man! I know you don't believe in all
those things! You said I couldn't possible understand
what it is to be powerless. I can now.
Please, go to Tuney! I know you have many questions
and she is the only one who can answer you.
I know you won't speak to Dumbledore but please
go and see Petunia! It is too risky right now for you
to contact me directly. The Order is guarding us.
Sev... If anything should happen to me before you
get this – go see Petunia first and then please
take her away from James! I will wait for you.
Love, Lily
Severus stared at the letter. He didn't realize until he suddenly gasped for air that he had momentarily stopped breathing. He had had a pretty good idea of what it would say but it was something else to actually see it. It felt terrible. Here it was in black and white and no longer cryptic. This time he had it in Lily's hand. He could not fail now. Not after everything he had done to Lily and the girl. He could not leave her to slowly wither away with her relatives. She was not simply Dumbledore's weapon. She was a person.
“Severus?” said Minerva and tryingly held out her hand in hopes of being allowed to read it.
“You... I should have... I can't do this,” he managed to get out.
In a moment, Poppy was out of her chair and attempting to get Severus to take her seat. He collapsed into the armchair and hid his face in his hands, letting the letter fall to the floor.
“Severus, breathe! Do you need a Calming Draught?” said Poppy.
Severus sneered at her. Absolutely not! He wouldn't be fussed over. He just needed a moment. Well, he needed to be alone.
“Perhaps we should continue this another night?” asked the Headmaster.
Minerva had picked up the letter from the floor and was finishing reading through it.
“I think we had better not,” she disagreed. “Before we go anywhere, Albus, why did you alter the wards?”
“She doesn't need you interfering. She needs to calm down and feel at home,” replied Dumbledore.
“How is she supposed to feel at home there?” cried Poppy. “They lock her up and neglect to feed her! That's childabuse, Headmaster! And we don't even know everything!”
“I have someone watching the house,” began Dumbledore.
“Who exactly?” said Severus. “And just where were they all those years?”
“Mrs Figg cannot possibly be watching every minute and neither, I might add, can you.”
“You left her with that old hag? So you have never actually bothered to go there and check on her yourself? Not even once?” said Severus as he lept up from the chair.
He already knew this of course but that didn't make him any less angry.
“Neither of you will contact her these three days. I will expect you to remain here. We will need to plan for her arrival. I will need to consider what to do with her and before you all start I will be taking her wishes and yours into account of course! Whenever possible.”
Severus huffed and Poppy placed a hand on his arm in an attempt to calm him. Severus snatched the letter back from Minerva. He needed to get out of there before Poppy decided to put him in the infirmary. He was going to return to his own quarters and knock himself out with a few potions. Tomorrow the three of them would have to begin planning their next move. He simply nodded to the Headmaster before leaving the office. Words were too dangerous.