Harry never told any of his friends about what had happened in Snape’s office. To Harry’s regret, but not unexpectedly, Snape withdrew after this event, retracting from the more friendly and supporting behavior between him and Harry that had prevailed since the start of term, and returning to an extremely reserved approach that had been customary for their relationship during long periods the previous year. They were bound to meet now and again, because Snape taught both at St Mungo’s med school in the evenings, and at the Auror program every now and then. But he avoided to speak to Harry out of class, and he no longer dropped by to pick Harry up for lunch to have an update on the young healer apprentice’s activities at St Mungo’s.

Harry experienced other misgivings as well. Ginny had accepted a transfer to the French Quidditch league as part of an international exchange program. In January she would move to Le Grand Eclat by the Mediterranean and spend the whole season in France. Harry was grieved, but bore it stoically, comforting himself that he would visit frequently.

December passed by in a flicker, and Christmas came by. On Christmas Eve, Ron and Hermione accompanied Harry to Godric’s Hollow to visit his parents’ graves. Harry tried to quell the disappointment that Ginny had not come with them. There was a nagging feeling that he constantly gave in and gave up on his own interests to satisfy her, but that he seldom got anything in return. But he loved her, he thought fiercely, and his patience would pay off in the end. He had once and for all decided not to antagonise Ginny and always let her have her way. He was determined not to let small disappointments and hurt feelings get in the way of the greater picture of love.

Christmas was celebrated at the Burrow with the Weasleys and their extended family which was now considerable, including Fleur, Bill’s wife, Hercules, George’s boyfriend, Percy’s new girlfriend and further Mrs Tonks and Teddy, whom all stayed at the Burrow, not to count various cousins, uncles and aunts who dropped by now and then during the holiday. 

On December 29th in the afternoon things were a little quieter and Harry was sitting in Ginny’s old room at the Burrow. She had told him that she wanted to talk, and he was glad, because they had in fact many things to sort out, and they never seemed to get down to it. Harry thought that every little bit of reflection on Ginny’s side must be beneficial, because she had a tendency to push things ahead of her, or simply ignore things out of impatience. When she started to talk to him, however, he did not understand at first what she was getting at.

She started with stating the obvious, namely that they would be apart for the next six months.

“I’ll visit,” said Harry. “Every so often, you’ll see.”

Ginny frowned and went on with how young and inexperienced they were. Harry squirmed a bit.

“We’ve been through a great deal,” he objected quietly.

“But in terms of relationships,” Ginny insisted. “I’m your first girlfriend, properly speaking. You can’t count that innocent little fling with Cho in fifth year, can you? Aren’t you curious, interested in exploring relationships on other levels?”

Harry looked nonplussed. No, he wasn’t. What did she mean? A little impatiently, Ginny went on explaining that she thought that they should take the opportunity now that they would be apart to convene on a freer form of relationship. Harry knitted his eyebrows.

“You want to sleep with other people, why?” he asked, more perplex than upset. Ginny blushed and looked down.

“I know that I’ll probably never find a more suitable partner when it comes to sex than you, Harry,” she mumbled quietly. “And I’ll never find someone who loves me deeper than you.”

No, precisely, that was Harry’s sentiment too. So what was the problem? They had something magical between them, uncontestably - Ginny herself acknowledged it. He inclined his head, still perplexed. Ginny looked uncomfortable and took a deep breath before launching into a lengthy and complicated explanation that Harry did not quite follow.

The bottom line of it turned out to be that she thought Harry was too serious about their relationship, too serious about pretty much everything.

“It anguishes me,” she said. “I only want to have some fun. Everything doesn’t need to be so dead serious all the time. It’s so intense with you!”

“I think that your anxiety comes from the traumas of Fred’s death and from the attack in Paris last year, which are repressed by that Obliviating treatment,” countered Harry, but Ginny immediately made an angry gesture to rise and leave, and Harry had to beg her to stay and finish the discussion. He had to promise not to bring the Obliviates up again.

“You and I are so different,” Ginny went on. “You’re dedicated to your studies and all those different projects of yours. You want to work, I want to play Quidditch and have fun. You want to stay at home, I want to go out. We’re simply not compatible right now, let’s face it.”

Harry thought it was unfair of her to say so, because he had tried all autumn to adjust to her ideas and tried to join in her outings. And it didn’t matter that they were different as long as they loved each other, did it?

Next, Ginny brought up security.

“I’m sick and tired of it,” she said. “Such a simple thing as bringing a friend to Grimmauld Place is so complicated because of the Fidelius. And I don’t like to be reminded of the fact that you might be attacked any time.”

“It’s been quiet in that area since Soundy was abducted and freed,” said Harry.

“Well, I don’t want to live in the middle of it,” said Ginny. “I don’t want to be afraid. I don’t want to have to think about security at all.”

Harry was confused. He understood it was a problem, but there was not much he could do about it. They had good support from Mrs Steadfast and the Aurors, he objected.

“We’re still too young to commit so seriously to each other,” exclaimed Ginny. “Look at my brother… Look at Ron and Hermione, I mean. He stopped going out the moment she breathed an objection…”

Harry opened his mouth to say that Ron had simply kept to the agreement that they had all reached, but Ginny forestalled him.

“They already behave like husband and wife. I wouldn’t be surprised if they get married and have children soon.”

Harry thought it was unlikely, because Hermione was as dedicated to her studies as he was, and Ron, well, Ron was a bit immature to have children of his own so soon, wasn’t he?

“I’m pretty sure you’d like me to stay at home and cuddle with you every single night. It’s so boring! It gives me the creeps! I can’t stand it – I need to go out!” Ginny burst out.

”I accept that you need a great amount of freedom, Ginny. When have I ever tried to restrain you?” pleaded Harry. “But being with other people… What does it mean? What do you want from me?”

“What I want to say…” Ginny was breathing quickly, “…is that you’re welcome to France to visit, but I don’t want to be tied by our relationship. I won’t abide by your visits only. I want to be free.”

“Are you breaking up with me?” Harry’s voice trembled, incredulity showing in every feature.

Ginny stayed mute.

“Is it over?” insisted Harry. “Is that what you mean? Why?” he burst out when he imagined the least little nod from Ginny.

“I told you,” she said stubbornly. “It’s too intense.”

“But…!” Harry was bewildered.

“I only want a pause,” Ginny tried to explain, “and I want to be honest with you. There’s this guy who plays in a band - he plays the drums – and I found out that his band is playing in France the coming season. He’s got hold of an apartment already in Le Grand Eclat – that’s where he’ll be based - and since it’s not so easy to find an apartment we agreed to share, and… well… I’m being honest with you here, Harry…”

Harry’s features were beginning to crumple. He sat silent, staring at his hands for a long time. At last he lifted his head and gave Ginny a wounded gaze.

“You want to be with this guy?” he whispered. Ginny squirmed a bit.

“I want to have the choice. I want to be free,” she answered curtly.

“I’m too serious, too intense?” asked Harry in an even lower voice.

“Well, yes, for me, at this moment of life, you are, but…” Ginny rose, uncomfortable but with an expression of relief all the same on her face. “Just think about it for a while, Harry. It’s only another form of relationship, really. We can still be friends, and even lovers occasionally,” she said. “Don’t overreact now,” she added because Harry had started to tremble and shake all over. “I’ll leave you to calm down,” Ginny finished a bit lamely and sneaked out of the door.

Harry gasped and doubled up, emotions and thoughts in a chaotic whirl. In the middle of it all, something strange detached and grew stronger inside him, like a bubble rising from the depth, and it surprised and frightened Harry by the reverberations it was causing in his body. He stared around the room as if seeing it for the first time. It was Ginny’s room since she was a child: there was a small collection of Quidditch player figures on a shelf, and a painting she had done when she was thirteen on the wall. The quilt on the bed was one she had made together with her mother at fifteen, and high up on the bookcase lay a magically preserved red rose that Harry had once given her when they were together in sixth year at Hogwarts, before Dumbledore died.

The impulse that almost overwhelmed Harry was one to smash everything in the room to pieces. He already felt a buzz of magic in his chest, in his arms. Panicked, he fled out of the room. The impending rage lessened a bit once in the corridor on more neutral ground. Harry put out a hand to support himself against the wall, because he felt almost dizzy. But there it was again, the bubble of anger rising. He must get out of the house! He started to stumble down the corridor, supporting himself against the wall. Suddenly Mrs Tonks appeared before him, coming out of a door from the side. He must have looked terrible because she exclaimed “Harry!” in a shocked tone of voice. He stopped and looked mutely at her, barely seeing her because everything was a blur. Did he hyperventilate? Was that why he felt so faint? He tried to force himself to hold his breath and his sight cleared up a bit.

“Harry?” Mrs Tonks said again, alarmed. Harry looked at the old lady – Teddy’s grandmother, who had suffered so many losses, both her husband and her daughter.

“She broke up with me,” he whispered. “Ginny left me.”

“Dear Harry,” Mrs Tonks said, putting a gentle hand on his arm. But all of a sudden Harry’s face contorted and he jerked his arm away and fled out through the front door.

***

A little later Mrs Tonks stepped into the kitchen where the Weasleys were about to sit down for supper.

“Where’s Harry? Will you fetch him, please, Ginny?” Mrs Weasley said while putting a bowl of steaming potatoes on the table.

“Will you go, Hermione? He’s in my room. Please?” said Ginny. Hermione shot her a quick scrutinising glance but made for the door without comment. She stopped when Mrs Tonks said in an almost wondering tone of voice:

“He went out. Harry ran out of the house – he didn’t even take his cloak…”

Mrs Weasley opened her mouth to retort when the doorbell rang. Mr Weasley checked his security watch that he had recently been bestowed with.

“It’s someone we know because they made it passed the wards without alerting me,” he said and went to answer the door. Only a short while later he was back with a beaming Mrs Steadfast and a slightly sheepish looking Snape.

“We’re here to see Harry,” Mrs Steadfast said as soon as they entered the kitchen and scanned the room with her quick eyes. “Apparently the professor here has been considering to visit since Christmas Eve, but never got down to deciding himself to actually do it. When I heard about it today I told him it was ridiculous and that we should go straight ahead. A late Christmas gift is better than no gift at all.” Snape looked even more embarrassed. “So, where is our young hero?” urged Mrs Steadfast.

“Er… He seems to have gone missing,” answered Mr Weasley since no one said anything, still confused by Mrs Tonks announcement.

“Harry? Missing?” said Mrs Steadfast in a voice of steel, rising one eyebrow.

“Mrs Tonks?” said Mr Weasley. The old woman blinked, she seemed a little dazed.

“He ran out of the house,” she confirmed. “He looked terrible,” she added.

Ginny sighed a little impatiently and Mrs Tonks steered her eyes at the young witch.

“He said that you broke up with him, that you had left him,” she whispered.

Everyone stared at Ginny. When she did not attempt to deny what Mrs Tonks had just claimed, but stared back defiantly at her family, Mrs Weasley let out a little cry.

“Did you break up with Harry, Ginny? Whatever for? Little quarrels like that are so unnecessary! He’s usually so stable- I must say that he’s got a unicorn’s patience with you - but you must have gotten to him. He obviously thought that you meant it, or he wouldn’t have been so upset. He was upset, was he, Dora?”

“He looked… He looked… completely shattered…” the old lady said, her voice beginning to tremble.

Mrs Weasley glared at Ginny with reproach. Snape took what seemed to be an involuntary step forward, looking at Ginny.

“You broke up with him?” he asked again, a deep frown between his eyes. Ginny blushed.

“I can break up with my boy-friend if I want, no? Without rising a riot with everybody?” she answered a bit hoarsely. Snape said nothing, but Mrs Steadfast stepped up at his side.

“That… Of course, but… He’s missing. He went out on his own, that’s what worries me now,” she said, more firm as she went along. “How long ago?” she asked Mrs Tonks.

“Not long… You must have missed him by twenty minutes only,” the old woman provided.

Suddenly the kitchen started to buzz of voices. Where could Harry have gone? What was his state of mind? What were the risks of him being found and attacked by unfriendly wizards and witches? How long should they wait before sending out someone to search for him? At least the Aurors were already alerted thanks to Mrs Steadfast’s presence.

“Merlin,” muttered Ginny. “He’s only been missing for what – thirty minutes by now? What a fuss! Maybe he’s only having a walk and will return in no time at all. But this is so typical of Harry – everything is to be taken so seriously with him and it’s always so dramatic!”

“Now, you’re being unfair, Ginny,” said Mrs Weasley and was supported by Mrs Steadfast.

“There’s a reason why Mr Potter shouldn’t be out wandering on his own,” she said. “Now, please tell me, what did Harry and you say to each other? You did have a conversation earlier this evening, I gather?” Ginny blushed again.

“It was private,” she retorted haughtily, but when both her mother and Mrs Steadfast frowned hard at her, she rolled her eyes and went on. “We only talked of my going to France and of us being separated for a considerable length of time.”

“But Harry already knew that,” Hermione objected. “He wasn’t happy, but he had accepted it.”

“I pointed out that it would have repercussions on our relationship,” said Ginny.

“I know Harry prepared to visit often,” said Ron, not understanding his sister’s arguments. Snape riveted his eyes on Ginny and spoke sternly.

“What did you say, specifically, that made him realise it was definitely over? We need to know in order to assess his state of mind and the risks he’s susceptible to take if he’s desperate.”

“I told him - a bit bluntly perhaps - about our differences. I think he’s too serious for me,” said Ginny defiantly, but Snape frowned.

“It’s not definite enough…” he mumbled. “He was desperate, was he?” Snape turned to Mrs Tonks who suddenly started to sob and tremble as if something caught up with her. Concerned Mrs Weasley and Fleur helped her sit down.

“Why, Dora, I’ve never… Calm down, Dear…” said Mrs Weasley, worried for her friend.

“He was pale… like a ghost…” hacked Mrs Tonks lifting her head to look at Snape who seemed to be the one person who took this most seriously. “When he told me, he looked… lost… broken… Then he tore away from me, violently…” She sobbed with greater force. Obviously the old woman had been impressed and scared by what had happened. Snape’s features hardened and his eyes flew back at Ginny.

“I told him I’m going to share a flat in Le Grand Eclat with another guy, okay?” she said exasperated. “By Jupiter, you’re making a big thing out of this. At our age, people break up all the time!”

“You’ve already got another boyfriend?” Mrs Steadfast asked bluntly.

“No. Well, not exactly... We already know each other, but… I haven’t been unfaithful, or anything… Whatever that means…But I wanted to be honest with Harry,” said Ginny. Ron took a step towards her.

“I stood on your side all these months,” he said accusingly. “I’ve told Harry to have patience and to trust you, and now this?! Come on, it’s not fair!” Tears rose in Ginny’s eyes and she clenched her fists.

“You’re my family – you’re supposed to support me in this,” she exclaimed in a high-pitched voice glaring at Ron. “But look at you: you’re all in hysterics…” Her eyes darted from one person to another, landing at Mrs Tonks. Ginny clenched her jaws. “Because Harry’s so special, isn’t he?” she said bitterly. “He’s the Boy-who-lived, and all that… It’s always about life and death with him. Know what – I’m so sick of it! I’m not staying to watch you raise hell over this. I’m leaving right now. I’m going out with my real friends. This is precisely why I have to leave Harry. He’s a reminder of… he’s a reminder of…” she looked confused for a while “…too many bad things!” she finished with force and stormed out of the room.

“Oh, dear, what should we do? Arthur? Will you speak to her?” Mrs Weasley said nervously.

“I’ll have a try, dear, but I think we had better just let her go. She’ll calm down eventually. She knows we’re here for her,” Mr Weasley said and went after Ginny in an unhurried pace. Snape turned to Mrs Steadfast.

“We’d better try to locate Mr Potter, even if he’s not been gone long, to make sure he doesn’t do something stupid,” he said.

“You think he’s liable to do something?” said Mrs Steadfast.

“Yes, he might,” answered Snape, looking away.

“Let’s get down to it, then,” said Mrs Steadfast, not questioning Snape’s assessment further.

Everyone seemed to be a bit shocked by the news of Harry’s and Ginny’s separation, and the organization of the search for Harry was not the best. People started to serve themselves food and ate hurriedly, seated or standing, in order to be able to do something later to help. It was a bit unclear what should be done, however. Someone should wait at the Burrow, obviously, if Harry came back. Mrs Weasley and Mrs Tonks were not planning on going anywhere, while Ron and Hermione offered to Apparate to Grimmauld Place and check if Harry had returned there. George and Hercules wanted to check with their friends if Harry turned up at their places. Mr Weasley came back almost instantly from Ginny’s room, having been dismissed, and proposed to check St Mungo’s and the Auror Headquarters in case Harry might want to take refuge at a familiar although not personal place. Bill and Percy retreated to the living room in order to floo call a number of Harry’s old friends from Hogwarts and ask them to get in touch if Harry turned up. Mrs Steadfast returned to her office to alert her Auror colleagues who were on call during the night. Snape stuck to Mrs Steadfast since she would be the person gathering all the information.