A Father's Love by Slaughterdeer

“No don’t kill her!” – He awoke with sweat-covered sheets, wet pyjamas and a
pulse that felt like his heart was about to explode. He sat up straight on the
corner of his bed, tears still streaming down his face. His chest hurt from
screaming his lungs out and he felt something sticky dripping down his
forehead but didn’t bother to care. He had taken five painkiller potions the
night before and had just dreamed of his mother's murder again. Looking
around to see if he had woken up Ron or Dean, he remembered that he put a
silencing spell on his bed, so they would not be disturbed by his screams every night.

Searching for his glasses, he put on his robe and left the dormitory through
the portrait hole. He just wanted to be alone. After these bad dreams, the only
escape for him was to wander the school grounds or walk on the school
premises. He didn’t care if he was caught or not. Didn’t even care to wear his
invisibility cloak. The only thing that he needed now was for him to get away from that place, to forget about what he had just seen.
“I killed her” he repeated while walking with his head lowered to the ground. His scar hurt so much that he had to press his hand onto it to make it stop. That’s where he noticed the blood. He must have been dripping that blood on the ground the whole way up here. Although feeling dizzy he shrugged it off and found himself just outside of the forbidden forest. He decided to just sit by an old tree and breathe in the fresh and ice-cold air.

Each breath he took hurt his swollen throat even more but at least that meant that he was still alive. Shivering from the breeze, he hugged himself with his cloak and tried to keep his thoughts blocked and controlled.
All that he managed though was uncontrolled sobbing and shaking. He just can't do this anymore. He can't bear the pain anymore. The visions Voldemort
let him relive every night. Dumbledore shutting him off and ignoring him.
Especially right now, where he would need him the most!
“Why me?” he screamed.
Although only a very hoarse sound came out of his mouth the sound echoed
on the lake and he jumped from it. He buried his head again, felt dizzy, and
something wet coated his black uncombed hair and face.

Suddenly he heard something. Was it the wind? Alarmed he drew his wand.
“Who is there?” he whispered and sounded more scared than anything..
Another branch moved weirdly in the distance.
He stood up but regretted it immediately. A pain so strong shot through his
skull that he thought he was hit by ten cruciatus curses. He tried to scream
but no sound came out. Instead, his legs gave way. Before he could hit the
ground though, steady hands grabbed him by the shoulders and lowered him
to the ground.