As he talked with Professor Dumbledore Snape guiltily recalled every single instance where he had thought about torturing, cursing, or poisoning Harry Potter. Sure, he had thought about it many times in his hatred of the young man during the school year, but he had never intended to make good on any of the plans. They were more of a way to relieve stress than anything.

Severus was certain that one did not just torture someone with the ultimate intent to kill and simply forget the event entirely. Snape could remember every wizard he had ever cursed under the Dark Lord’s service, and Potter’s name was not among the names in his head. As far as he was concerned Snape had never intended on changing that fact.

Of course. Severus could have kicked himself for being so daft. The answer was so simple that it surprised Snape that Dumbledore hadn’t mentioned it first. At the flicker of hope that vouched for his innocence Snape felt his dark heart lighten slightly.

“Sir, perhaps the reason why I don’t remember the torturing of Potter is because I was not present, because it simply wasn’t I who tortured him.”

Dumbledore could hear the subtle, desperate hope in Snape’s voice, and he gave the younger man a saddened smile and allowed him to speak.

“The reason that Potter believes me to be the one is because the Death Eater only looked like me. A simple Polyjuice Potion could have easily done the job, and even Potter should know that.”

With a Polyjuice Potion even Lucius Malfoy could have taken Snape’s place and Potter would have known no different. Dumbledore gave Snape another gentle smile, and Snape felt his flicker of hope abruptly dim and die. Still, Severus couldn’t say that Dumbledore’s reaction had caught him completely off-guard.

********

Harry Potter sat in his dingy, small prison, and puzzled over Professor Snape. The man who had cured and cared for him over the past few days, in spite of his bedside manner, was very different from the Death Eater who had tortured and poisoned him. Harry had to wonder, were they indeed the same man?

Harry knew that Professor Snape hated him; he had accepted that fact years ago, and he made a special effort to stay out of Snape’s path. Things hadn’t always worked out the way that Harry would have liked, but Professor Snape had always made an effort to protect even his most despised students. Harry knew that Snape was not the friendliest wizard, but the man had never done him harm before he’d been kidnapped.

The man was a puzzle of darkness and potion ingredients. Impatient and brooding, Harry wondered what had driven Snape to become a teacher in the first place. Snape certainly didn’t seem to like children, so Harry couldn’t see how he would get anything out of a career attempting to teach them to make things that had the potential to burn through the soles of his shoes.

It had to have been Snape that had done it; Harry couldn’t see any other way around it. Harry had even rejected the theory of another Death Eater using a Polyjuice Potion and posing as Snape. Harry believed that he had spent enough time with the professor to recognize the real man.

He acted like he didn’t even know what I was talking about when I implied that he had tortured me. Not to mention the fact that he had to look into my memories to know how to cure me. I know that it was him. Even if he denies it, I still know what happened.

******

“Headmaster, one simply does not forget four weeks spent torturing a young wizard for the Dark Lord,” Severus stated in a defensive tone.

“My dear boy, you must allow me to apologize to you for your lack of knowledge on these unfortunate events. There are some things that I must explain to you,” Dumbledore spoke with a new edge in his soft tone.

“The reason that you cannot remember the events that occurred during Harry’s disappearance is because I cast a memory charm on you, Severus.”

In spite of himself Snape laughed softly in a show of disbelief. No one, not even Dumbledore would ever dare alter his memory, unless they didn’t place very much value on their lives.

“Severus, you must understand that under normal circumstances I would have never done such a terrible thing to you. However, when you came to me after leaving Harry with his relatives, and told me of his condition I wanted to entrust his care to no one but you.”

Yes, Headmaster, that makes perfect sense. Entrust the boy to the bloody Death Eater who was assigned to take his life.

“You told me yourself that only a potions expert could properly ensure the boy’s survival. When I requested that you take Harry into your charge to cure him you refused. Understandably you wanted nothing to do with him, but I could not entrust his life to anyone else. For Harry’s sake, I took matters into my own hands and altered your memories.”

There was a sour expression on Snape’s face. Dumbledore had never lied to him before, so it was unlikely that he was lying now. Snape nodded, and in spite of his wish to dismiss everything that Dumbledore had said; he could not ignore this.

“It is difficult for me to believe all of this when I don’t recall it,” Snape stated bitterly.

Dumbledore muttered something under his breath; Snape recognized the old language of an incantation, but he could not hear the spell. “Do not worry Severus, Harry will understand once you explain things to him.”

The conversation was over. Snape stepped back from his fireplace mantle and leaned against the wall. It’s true. It was me.

****

Snape entered Potter’s cell quietly. He had brought both mint tea, broth and some dry toast for Potter to eat. Harry thanked the professor for the meal and sat down to eat solid food for the first time in weeks.

Dry toast was not Harry’s favorite thing, but it was a pleasant change from a diet of complete fluids so he made no complaint. Snape took his place on the stool and sat quietly watching the young man eat.

In a few moments Snape had allowed himself to drift into his own thoughts.

He was back in the cell from his dream. Potter lay on the floor; the boy appeared to be unconscious. The feeling that he had had that night returned to him; he couldn’t do this. This wasn’t right. Potter was just a boy, and he didn’t deserve this torture.

Harry groaned on the floor as he began to regain his senses. There was no choice for either of them in this matter. It was either this or death. He would have to follow his orders and hope that Potter was strong enough to endure. Snape forced a grimace of pity into a sneer as Harry looked about in confusion. This would not be easy for either one of them.

“Professor Snape? Sir, are you all right? You don’t look well,” Harry almost jumped back when Snape snapped back to reality.

“Of course I’m all right,” Snape stated in a clipped tone. “How are you, Potter?”

“Much better, sir.”

Snape nodded, the boy looked much better than he had a few days ago. “Potter, would you like to get some air?” Snape asked softly. This room was bringing back unpleasant memories for him, and he shuddered to think of what it had done to Potter.

Harry felt his heart leap. Of course he wanted out of this room. Almost anywhere was better than a dungeon.

“Come along, Potter. Unlike you, I don’t have all day,” Snape lied; truthfully he had nothing better to do.

Harry didn’t need to be told twice. Eagerly he followed the Potions Master out of the confines of the small prison and up the stairs away from the dungeons.

Harry had never been so glad to be outdoors. It was nice to feel like he had some freedom.

“Stay close,” Snape warned, and Harry nodded. Snape wandered over to a bench and sat down; he had no intention of letting Potter wander off on his own. He sighed at the thought of watching Potter like some toddler at a park.

Snape had no desire to explain his actions to Potter; Dumbledore could explain things to the boy if he really had to know. Snape didn’t want to rehash unpleasant memories, both for his own sake and for Potter’s. He had never explained himself before and things had always seemed to work out. Really he didn’t want Potter to understand; they would both be safer that way even if it wasn’t the fairest course of action.

Now that he remembered more fully with each moment that passed what he had put Potter through, he wished that he could take it back for both of them. Somehow an apology, even if he could force himself to make one, didn’t seem like it would be enough to make up for what he had done to Potter. Some things can never be set right, Snape told himself.

****

It was weeks later when, much to the Dursleys’ dismay, Harry Potter returned to their home with a letter of stern warning from Dumbledore that he was not to be mistreated by them. The young wizard was nearly fully recovered, and despite some confusion he had gained a new respect for the Potions Master. Dumbledore had been kind enough to explain things to Harry before allowing him to return home for the remaining time until the next term would begin. Harry now understood that Snape had not had a choice in his treatment, and he hoped that something like that would not happen again.

Harry had explained things to Ron and Hermione in a letter and he could hear surprise in both of their replies. Harry smiled; it was good to be back home where he could contact his friends if he wanted to.

Harry looked up as an unfamiliar owl carrying a small parcel flew through his window. He took the package from the bird. Once it was relieved of its duty it flew to Hedwig’s cage for a drink and then swooped briskly out the window to return to where it had come from.

Attached to the oddly shaped package was a note.

Mr. Potter,

I trust that you are still on your way to a full recovery. Enclosed is your wand. My regrets for not returning it to you sooner. Take care.

Professor Severus Snape

Harry grinned as he unwrapped his wand. It was good to have it back. He carefully tucked Snape’s brief note into the floorboard with the others from his friends. With a breath of contentment, Harry leaned back and eagerly anticipated the next semester at Hogwarts.