Title: Gun, Roses, Beer, and Antics
| 27 Jun 2008 7:39 pm
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Reviewer: chibisnape (Anonymous)
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WOW!!! I love it, this is so different from all the other stories out there!!! just wow please update soon ^_^
Title: Gun, Roses, Beer, and Antics
| 27 Jun 2008 11:26 am
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Reviewer: Jan_AQ (Signed)
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I like your story. Saying that I found the dialogue to overpower the actions doesn't mean that I dislike your story. I just added a second review, because in my first review, I said something wrong. Don't take my meaning wrong.
Author's Response: I had no intention of offending you. I'm sorry.
Title: Gun, Roses, Beer, and Antics
| 27 Jun 2008 5:24 am
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Reviewer: Jan_AQ (Signed)
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I meant to stay in my review that "All the dialogue is a little overpowering though, without so many descriptions of the actions that could go along with them but don't." There is a lot of talk, not enough doing, the characters look blank to me, what they are doing, especially when Snape and the trio meet your original characters. It was a lot of chaos and women popping in with dialogue, and the canon characters being shoved into the background. They should never be in the background. :)
Author's Response: I'm sorry you did not like my story, but I will take your note of your suggestions. I had been toying with the idea of eliminating one of the men and/or merging them as one character. I am currently in the process of doing so. My personal style is a lean toward heavy dialogue, but that is something I'm too stubborn to change. I will add some actions to the piece, but I often do my characterizations via their dialogue and how they speak. I also build my characters slower than most authors and have been trying to pick up the pace of that. This is something I am currently working on in my original pieces as well. Again, I am sorry you disliked my story, but I do thank you for your advice. I am looking into everything you have said. Even if I don't change everything, I want you to know that it is still appreciated.Carpe Diem
Title: Gun, Roses, Beer, and Antics
| 27 Jun 2008 2:11 am
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Reviewer: Pellegrina (Anonymous)
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This is really an unique idea - I don't think I've seen anything like this before!!! And a Severitus to boot - fantastic! I love those! I really enjoyed reading this so far and sincerely hope that the perfectionism you mentioned wont keep you from updating soon!!!
Title: Gun, Roses, Beer, and Antics
| 26 Jun 2008 11:38 pm
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Reviewer: fanficaholic (Anonymous)
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I really like this story. I like this version of Snape and I like his friends. I can't wait for more!
Title: Gun, Roses, Beer, and Antics
| 26 Jun 2008 11:36 pm
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Reviewer: Icepick (Anonymous)
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Haha. This is incredibly weird, but surprisingly amusing. And I am so glad that Snape is getting into trouble. *grins evilly* I hope he gets even more payback for how nasty he has been to Harry (I like fan fiction Snape a lot, so long as he is willing to at least try to redeem himself.)
I would prefer less foul language, though. There's so much of it that it kind of pulls you out of the story. Particularly when Harry is using it—him using the F-word seems OOC.
This is bloody brilliant. I can't wait to read more (well, I guess I can but I will be looking forward to more.)
Title: Gun, Roses, Beer, and Antics
| 26 Jun 2008 10:35 pm
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Reviewer: Nightshade (Anonymous)
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GREAT JOB!!!!!!!! I LOVE THIS STORY!!! Please please please please please update again soon!! I love how Sev's friends scowlded him. I can't wait to see what hapens when sev and harry meet again. LOL! Thanks! :)
Title: Gun, Roses, Beer, and Antics
| 26 Jun 2008 8:59 pm
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Reviewer: anon (Anonymous)
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I am *loving* this story. I can't wait to see where you take it!
That was...wow....Sevvy is scaring me, but I find this story oddly appealing. Reading the summary, I was unsure if this would be pulled off, but I believe you're doing it. Good job and good luck!
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