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Reviews For Love Everlasting
May I point out a few typos? 1) "So of course *their* going to do everything in their power to gain custody of him in the event that something should happen to you." -> they're 2) "*You'r* mother's been ill?" -> your 3)"And what would happen when I need him to Spy again," -> I don't see why 'spy' should be capitalized and you may want to end there with a question mark. 4)"Don't even start on the whole 'respect teacher*'*s' lecture, Hermione." -> omit that ' 5)"It was *diffrent*, but alright." -> different Ok, that's about it. Author's Response: Thank you! I have said it before and I'll say it again, Grammer isn't my strong suit. Thanks for telling me my errors.
I think you were spot on as to the people the Ministry would have picked for Harry's guardians if anything happens to Lily. I suspect that in the end Lucius, the blackguard, would have his hands on Harry because he owns the Ministry and he could completely manipulate the Dursleys into turning Harry over to him (or even kill them and take the boy if he was impatient). Definitely not something that anyone on the side of the good guys want to have happen. Ron was amusing and you got his voice exactly right; his irritation with Hermione was perfectly drawn. Hermione was... well she was Hermione and this probably starts out as one of her more enjoyable to trips to Hogwarts for her since she has Flitwick to talk to about all the things that the boys don't want to hear about. Of course, I suspect the trip won't stay enjoyable with that hint about Deatheaters planning to attack the train. You also avoided one of my pet peeves in fic-writing: the laundry list description of everything and anything. Instead you very successfully let the characters create the atmosphere and have control of hte story. Bravo! Author's Response: Thank you! I am very happy people are likeing my story. Hope you enjoy the rest of the story as well.
Author's Response: Thank you! Author's Response: Thank you!
Perhaps Lily should marry Sev and then, as HArry's step-father, the ministry would not be able to intervene if anything happened to Lily. I hate the Ministry of Magic. I am definitely interested, but please, don't kill Lily. ~Lesley~ Author's Response: Thank you! Yes, I too hate the Ministry of Magic. As for Lily and death. You'll just have to wait and see. But I'll think about your idea. Thank you for reviewing! Author's Response: Thank you! Yes, I too hate the Ministry of Magic. As for Lily and death. You'll just have to wait and see. But I'll think about your idea. Thank you for reviewing!
I'd love to learn more about the history of your story, too, such as how Sirius died and how was Voldemort driven away. But hopefully we'll learn more as the story goes along. Poor Harry, I know he's worried about his mum (with good reason, it seems), and I feel sorry for him. I like that Severus seems to be willing to see Harry in a new light, too. I'm looking forward to the next chapter! Author's Response: Thank you! I'm very happy you are liking my story so far. Yes, Lily is a mom on a mission. I'm trying to make her the strong, protective type of parent. As for learning about the history of the story; I'm placing bits and pieces in each chapter. And as for Severus seeing Harry in a new light. I'm afraid I'm guilty of rushing some things and I love softy Sev stories. But I'll try to make it some what realistic. Thanks again.
I am looking forward to more. Author's Response: Harry is in his second year. I don't really want to give anything away, but I will say this, you'll find out very soon. If not in the next chapter than the one after. Thank you for reviewing!
Author's Response: Thank you! And I will update soon.
Author's Response: Thank you! I do plan to update soon.
Author's Response: Thank you! I'm sorry about the rush durring this scene. I do plan to have DD explain why he simply let the matter drop. |
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