Potions and Snitches
Snape and Harry Gen Fanfiction Archive

Title: Dumbledore's Betrayal 27 Oct 2008 6:33 pm
Reviewer: Shannon (Anonymous) [Report This]
    Wow... Snape making a Horcrux is certainly an interesting twist. I'll be sure to follow your story!

    Your story sounds pretty good so far. I'm Canadian too, and I use "I'll have to process this" all the time. You could check the Oxford English Dictionary if you're really concerned whether or not that phrase is British or American.

    Anyway, I'm looking forward to your next chapter! ;-)

    Author's Response:

    Thank you for your review Shannon.  I use that phrase all the time too, and we Canadians use mostly British spelling, but I'm not sure about our terminology. I curious as to where in Canada you live.  I live in Montreal.

    if you noticed Lesley, who is from Australia has said that she uses this expression, as well.  Australians use many British terms--so I will be checking that out.  I wanted the story to be as true to form as much as possible.

Title: Dumbledore's Betrayal 27 Oct 2008 3:57 pm
Reviewer: Snapegirl (Signed) [Report This]
    This is very good so far, I like how Harry is full of anger and betrayal and wanted to get to know Severus better and sees, for the first time, how manipulative Dumbledore is. The Horcrux potions book is interesting, will harry be able to bring Snape back with it? I hope so!

    Author's Response:

    Thank you Snapegirl.  This is my first story and there is bound to be room for improvement.

    Well as far as the Horcrux goes, even if Harry uses the Horcrux to bring Snape back, he may get more than he bargained for! 

     

     

     

Title: Dumbledore's Betrayal 27 Oct 2008 9:17 am
Reviewer: wrappedinharry (Signed) [Report This]
    Hey Dawn. Fantastic start to what I am sure will be a great story. Very nicely written too. I am not sure I agree with another reviewer who said that she thought 'I need to process this' is an Americanism. I am Australian and our speech patterns tend to lean more towards the British than the American (and your Canadian anyway) and that phrase has been around for a long, long time...everywhere, I imagine.

    I wonder why Harry went back into the pensieve after the battle was over and won. Did he just want to see his mum again perhaps? And I am also concerned that HArry didn't seem to be upset in the least that JAmes Potter has just been cast in the role of a support character in his life, rather than a lead one. I would think that would be a major cause of distress. And HArry hasn't questioned why Snape was still as nasty as he ever was for the rest of fifth year and all of the sixth, even after finding out that Harry was his son

    The horcrux is very interesting...to think that Harry handled the thing for a whole year without knowing its biggest secret. I'm sorry that you've had to turn DD into the bad guy, but obviously you did have to. I hate DD being a bad guy.

    Looking forward to the next chapter.

    Lesley

    Author's Response:

    Thank  you Lesley.  I was kind of wondering about that statement beting labled as an Americanism too.  I will explain later why Harry went into the Pensieve to begin witth, and why he is not as angry as he might be, about James not being his father.  As far as Harry having the book for a year and not realising that it was a Horcrux, well...alot of these questions will be answered later. But, remember how angry Snape was when he realised that Harry had used his spell on Malfoy.  He was starting to suspect that Harry had the book at that point.  It made him very nervous.

    Dont worry about Dumbledore being the bad guy.  Harry is just angry right now; he will eventually realise that Dumbledore only did what he thought was right to protect him.  After all, Dumbledore didn't know the extent of the abuse that Harry suffered at the hands of the Dursley's, nor did he truly believe that Severus was capable of bringing up a child alone, without Lily.

Title: Dumbledore's Betrayal 27 Oct 2008 8:08 am
Reviewer: Nakago (Signed) [Report This]
    Oh. I've never read something like this. I start to wonder who Severus murdered to create a horcrux... Not very nice, professor, not nice at all.

    But... It creates new possibilities. And this is really interesting. So I'm waiting for more. Will Severus revive? If so how they will treat each other? Adult Harry and Severus who has only a part of his soul...

    Author's Response: Well, his Horcrux is created in a little bit different manner than Voldemorts. The magic used is not quite as Dark.  Although, consider that Snape worked as a spy for Voldemort for many years, I'm sure that he was not a choirboy. Also, he did murder Dumbledore, don't forget, although it was not done with malicious intent.  He did take a life.  Thanks for reviewing. 
Title: Dumbledore's Betrayal 27 Oct 2008 7:51 am
Reviewer: Deco (Anonymous) [Report This]
    It's quite interesting, but I wasn't sure about the time frame, and watch the Americanisms: "I need time to process this" is definitely one.

    Author's Response:

    Oh, I hadn't thought that that statement might not be considered British enough.  Thanks for pointing that out.  Time frame, well it takes place shortly after the Final Battle. Almost right after. Sorry if that's a little unclear.

Title: Dumbledore's Betrayal 27 Oct 2008 7:04 am
Reviewer: toast (Signed) [Report This]
    oooo that was great i can't wait to find out wut happens next

    Author's Response: Thank you, I appreciate your review.  It was a little scary posting my first story!  :)
Title: Dumbledore's Betrayal 27 Oct 2008 6:58 am
Reviewer: NotEvenHere (Anonymous) [Report This]
    Hey Dawn! I'm so glad you decided to take the plunge. Congrats on your first fic. You have a good story idea here and I like Harry's conflicted emotions in the beginning. I hope to see him struggle with his decisions in the next chapters to come. I liked Dumbledore in here as well. I thought you wrote his character well. I like how he justified himself. My only suggestion is that you keep working on Harry's emotions. This is a very hard and tiring, exhausting time in his life. After all, things were supposed to be simple now. And now it's all turned on its head. I'd like to see that struggle and conflict reflected even more as you continue on. I am very happy you are doing this, Dawn. Great start. :o)

    Author's Response:

    Thank you Tabitha!  I couldn't have done it without your help!  Thanks again.  You are right, I will try and work harder on Harry's emotions.  He has been through alot, and this is supposed to be a happy time for him, now he has THIS to deal with.   Thanks for reviewing!  ;)


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