Potions and Snitches
Snape and Harry Gen Fanfiction Archive

Title: Of Memories and Dead Things 03 Feb 2009 7:38 pm
Reviewer: Scorpia (Signed) [Report This]
    Hey, welcome to P&S. I really liked reading this story on ffnet. Glad you could post it here as well. A couple of things, 'but of course, it was only a memory.' Capital B is needed. 'The boy- who-lived couldn't finish, he did not even have a chance.' No space between boy- and who needed. "Amusing man, your father, wasn't he?", no comma needed. 'Snape didn't seem to hear Harry.' I don't think that sentence was supposed to be italicized. Love the cliff hanger ending!

    Author's Response:

    Hi! Thankyou for the welcoming. I've been wanting to post something on here for a LONG time. Thankyou also for the tips, I'll be sure to fix them =) More to come soon

    ~Clovergirl22 

Title: Of Memories and Dead Things 30 Jan 2009 6:58 am
Reviewer: snarky Beth (Signed) [Report This]
    Things are off to a great start! I like the plot, very creative possibility.

    Yeah, Snape definitely has good aim, lol. Poor Harry though, sounds like he really got jumbled up. Man, how’s Snape going to explain this to Dumbledore? O_O;

    This is looking to be a good read, hope to read more :)

    Author's Response:

    Thanks! I happy you liked it! and yes, much more is to come. As for Snape o...o the sneaky slytherin has his ways. Thankyou for reviewing!

    -Clovergirl22 

Title: Of Memories and Dead Things 30 Jan 2009 5:34 am
Reviewer: Snapegirl (Signed) [Report This]
    Sev has fantastic aim, whether it's verbally or physically. Poor Harry, he pushed Severus too far, but I think Severus will regret his actions, that temper flares and then it dies, unless you're his chief tormentor, James Potter. I hope he lets harry explain what he really thought about the memory. Oh, and I was wondering if he was mad at Sirius too, since he was there tormenting Severus also? Great beginning!

    Author's Response:

    Thankyou a bunch! Haha Snape should play baseball, he would make a terrific pitcher! As for Harry, well the kid can never get a break can he?  Diaster is assured *evil grin* Anyway, Sirius is to come in a few chapters so stay tuned! and thankyou for reviewing!

    ~Clovergirl22 

Title: Of Memories and Dead Things 29 Jan 2009 9:38 pm
Reviewer: Sukisho816 (Signed) [Report This]
    Nice idea and good start. Can't wait to find out what happens next.

    ~Sukisho816

    Author's Response:

    thanks! More is to come! Thankyou for reading and reviewing!

    ~Clovergirl22 

Title: Of Memories and Dead Things 29 Jan 2009 10:17 am
Reviewer: Morgan (Anonymous) [Report This]
    This is great! I love the topic. I can't wait to read lots more.

    Author's Response:

    Thanks! Much more to come! Thankyou for reading and reviewing!

    ~Clovergirl22 

Title: Of Memories and Dead Things 29 Jan 2009 6:27 am
Reviewer: faradheia (Anonymous) [Report This]
    I really enjoyed this and I'm definitely looking forward to the next part. Keep up the good work!

    Author's Response:

    Thanks! Much more to come! Thankyou for reading and reviewing!

    ~Clovergirl22

Title: Of Memories and Dead Things 29 Jan 2009 5:06 am
Reviewer: Anonymous (Anonymous) [Report This]
    This was really good! I think I'm going to enjoy this fic! Keep up the good work!

    Author's Response:

    Thanks! Much more to come! Thankyou for reading and reviewing!

    ~Clovergirl22

Title: Of Memories and Dead Things 29 Jan 2009 5:03 am
Reviewer: mithrilandtj (Signed) [Report This]
    Interesting start. Do more.

    Author's Response:

    And more I will do =D thanks for reading and reviewing!

    ~Clovergirl22 

Title: Of Memories and Dead Things 29 Jan 2009 3:55 am
Reviewer: Adah (Anonymous) [Report This]
    I liked this a lot! I'm personally a big fan of Oh-crap-i-hurt-potter-huggly!Snape so this worked for me
    YAY
    keep on writing - its good for the soul :)))

    Author's Response:

    Hahahaha! Yes, I love being a fan of thoes stories as well. More is to come so stay tuned! I agree 100% that writting is good for the soul!!! Thankyou for reading and reviewing!

    ~Clovergirl22 

Title: Of Memories and Dead Things 29 Jan 2009 1:27 am
Reviewer: PyroChilde (Anonymous) [Report This]
    Alright, let me start out by saying I love the idea behind this story and I think it has really great potential. Also, you're going to have to bare with me here as I've never really been good at con-crit (most of my reviews don't go beyond "I love it") lol.

    I think the plot is really good. I haven't read this particular "what if" before and its always great to find a new plot line. I liked Snape's voice in this chapter. It seemed very in character. Harry's voice seems...a bit off. I can't really point to anything specific but his thoughts don't seem his own. Your sentences in the first few paragraphs seem to border on run-ons but you seemed to work that out pretty quickly. By the end I think you have Harry sorted out too. I'd just take another look at the wording in the beginning. After Snape's POV, Harry seems a lot more in character.

    Now, all that above having been said, I really LOVED this first chapter and I'm on the edge of my seat waiting to read Snape's perspective of the ending there. I wouldn't change anything that actually happens in the fic, just some of the wording in the beginning, like I said. Also, keep in mind that this is just my two cents worth.

    Guh, I'm really sorry for dragging this review out so long :) One more thing then I'm done, I swear!! PLEASE write the next chapter SOON??? You're killing me here! I don't wanna wait for the edit to find out what happens next! **pouts**

    Kay, done now! Keep up the great work!
    ~Brandi~

    Author's Response:

    Hi! Thankyou for the review, It's good to get a good long review despite that it's chapter 1 and nothing really happened yet =D but thankyou very much for the nice long feedback about the characterization. I actually re-edited this chapter before I posted it up here to get all the bugs out *smirks* there still remains to be some and hopefully I can find a beta-reader to nip out the rest (unfortuantly It's been hard looking =( 

    Yes, MUCH more is to come, no worries there. I will be posting up every week or a little some. Thankyou for reading! Glad you enjoyed!

    ~Clovergirl22 


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