| Title: What's Owed
| 21 Feb 2011 12:26 am
|
| Reviewer: Shadow (Anonymous)
| [Report This]
|
"Just testing! It works great!" *lol*
Very nice story!
| Title: What's Owed
| 20 Feb 2011 10:18 pm
|
| Reviewer: Rom Weasley (Anonymous)
| [Report This]
|
I agree with Sevie Prince, I would like the confrontation too. Maybe you consider writing one?
| Title: What's Owed
| 20 Feb 2011 9:55 pm
|
| Reviewer: Siri (Anonymous)
| [Report This]
|
Wow, what a wonderful story! When will be the next chapter?
| Title: Nothing But The Rain
| 20 Feb 2011 9:53 pm
|
| Reviewer: Nakago (Anonymous)
| [Report This]
|
Very nice beginning and classic Snape's reaction. I think you did a great job with this story.
Author's Response: Thanks!
| Title: I'm With You
| 20 Feb 2011 9:50 pm
|
| Reviewer: Nakago (Anonymous)
| [Report This]
|
First I was rather confused. I remember another story about Mark and Harry, and I was almost certain that Mark's parents weren't abusive. And they weren't there, I've cheked. But, well, it's different story and they are different characters; only Mark and Harry stay the same. I think it's good you've showed another kind of Mark's parents. You've done what you could to make this story at least slightly different that the first one fanfiction for this challenge. And I'm glad that you did it.
| Title: Everything's A Mess
| 20 Feb 2011 9:43 pm
|
| Reviewer: Nakago (Anonymous)
| [Report This]
|
Great Severus here. He doesn't believe any Mark's word when it's something good (well, kind of) about Harry. I think it's very like him. I don't like Snape of this kind but I think he's very canonic. He wasn't warmhearted person in books and he isn't here. I like it... although I don't like him. Is it strange?... Well... He is difficult man, isn't he?
| Title: What's Owed
| 20 Feb 2011 9:38 pm
|
| Reviewer: Nakago (Anonymous)
| [Report This]
|
I'm really confused. There are generally good reviews and such low note? Something is wrong I think. I like this story very much, last chapter is as good as the first in my opinion. Yes, well, I'd like to read about these ten months or what was later but I'm satisfied this ending as well. (Although I must admit I'm waiting for another story anout Harry, Mark and Severus.) At least it HAS ending. And I like this ending very much.
Good chapter, a nice mix of grit and fluff; I really liked how you used Harry's conversation with Mark to show Severus the truth. Severus' reaction also felt very real; although his prejudice against Harry is portrayed as rather blind in the canon, he's definately depicted as a man who takes fast, decisive action. The ending did feel a bit rushed, though; it would have been nice if this story was a few chapters longer and chronicaled the change. Nevertheless, good work.
| Title: What's Owed
| 20 Feb 2011 8:32 pm
|
| Reviewer: malimed (Anonymous)
| [Report This]
|
Very interesting chapter; I really liked the interaction between the characters and thought that Professor Snape's reaction was believable. Looking forward to reading more.
However, you might want to amend some of the words; 'candy' is either 'sweets' or 'chocolate' (depending on the kind), 'chips' are 'crisps', 'soda' is generally refered to as a 'soft' or 'fizzy' drink and 'oatmeal' is 'porridge'. (It doesn't matter overmuch but it does add a feeling of authenticity to the story if the characters use British English)
|