It was Thursday night, quite after the visit when Snape came up from his lab for a glass of water. He opened a cupboard and pulled out a glass before looking askance at Hoppity. She was standing at the open kitchen door, looking out.

“What are you doing?” Snape asked, pouring himself a glass of water.

“Waiting for Harry,” was her simple reply.

“What is he doing?” Snape asked distastefully as he brought his glass of water over to the back window to see. The pint sized Potter was among the grass, head bent down and lips moving. Snape frowned at the sight. Now and then a flash of a light bug was seen, the boy didn’t even seem to notice them.

“I have no idea, he said he wanted to find something for show and tell…”

“Outside, in the dark?” Snape asked with a sardonic lilt. What could possibly take the boy so long to find out there, all that was out there were dirt and grass, perhaps some twigs and bugs, nothing that required whispering to oneself. “I’m sure that there is nothing out there that his classmates haven’t seen for themselves.”

He opened the door and called out, “Potter, get in here!” hoping that the brat would refuse so that he could manhandle him back inside and make him stand in a damp corner of the basement or something equally unpleasant for misbehaving.

Harry looked up curiously, but upon seeing his two guardians standing in the doorway he came over.

“In,” Snape said as he held the door open, slightly disappointed.

“Why?” Harry asked but walked under the arm holding the door open and into the house anyway.

“What were you doing out there?”

“Looking… for something for show and tell,” Harry admitted, hoping that no one would ask further.

Snape shut the door and locked it behind them, ending Harry’s last chance to find a snake to bring to school.

“But I have to find something for show and tell tomorrow!” Harry cried. “What am I supposed to do now?”

“I don’t know. Go to bed.”

“I’m not tired,” Harry replied petulantly, stomping a foot, but Snape didn’t seem to care or even notice him, going back to the sink to wash his drinking glass.

Harry stalked to a chair at the kitchen table and climbed up it to sit, crossing his arms. Glaring up at Snape, he swung one leg out, “What am I supposed to bring for show and tell now?” he asked hotly, demanding Snape’s attention.

“I do not know, and I do not care,” Snape replied silkily as he placed his now clean glass back into the cupboard and then left the room. Harry glared at his retreating back until he was out of sight.

Ever the peacemaker, Hoppity gave a tentative suggestion, “Erm, well Harry didn’t you mention about making a map before? I’m sure the other children could learn something from that.”

“I suppose,” Harry murmured.

---

Snape came back up some time later to see his two bothersome pains in the front room; Potter kneeling at the low coffee table, paper and crayons strewn about him and Hoppity sitting not far off. It was a bit late, but Potter had had a rest earlier so he supposed that it was alright.

“What are you working on, Potter?” he asked as he neared.

“A map,” Harry replied, his tongue sticking out through his mouth as he concentrated on his drawing. “Where are we supposed to be from again?”

“ England ,” Snape replied deadpanned, trying to vex the boy.

“No, I mean- nevermind. I’ll just make something up.”

Curiosity getting the better of him, Snape came closer to look over Potter’s head at the drawing. There were discarded papers on the table, failed attempts, some crumpled. He tried to figure out what Harry was trying to make but it was unrecognizable.

“What is that supposed to be?”

Harry stopped his coloring and looked up from under his fringe. He then looked down. “ Britain .”

It looked like a badly misshapen blob, nothing remotely resembling anything Snape had seen before, except perhaps Potions spills.

“Where’s Wales ?”

Harry looked down at his paper, a concentrated expression on his face. “Right here,” he replied pointing to a lump at the bottom of the blob.

Snape paused. “ Wales is supposed to be on the lower left, not the bottom.”

“It’s close enough, Severus,” Hoppity said from where she was drawing what appeared to be a garden.

“Not nearly,” Snape retorted sharply, pulling out a sheet of paper and sitting down so that he could use the table too. “We wouldn’t want to be to blame for badly educating the little snots, Harry included who should know better,” he said, ignoring Hoppity’s warning look and Harry’s uncomfortable squirm.

“Now Potter, pay close attention,” Snape said as he picked up a black colouring stick and outlined the British Isles as accurately as he could. He got to the Wales part and paid it particular attention, making sure that Harry was watching closely. “It goes out like this, Potter.”

“Oh.”

Hoppity spared them one last glance before she went back to her own picture.

Snape concentrated on his drawing, continuing the outline and going back over the parts that needed it, making sure that all the bumps and islands were as accurate as he could recall. Harry was watching closely, peering over the paper.

Scotland still didn’t look quite right, so Snape went over it again, trying to get it correct this time. The tricky part over, Severus was suddenly annoyed at the way it seemed he was doing all the work for the brat. “Well? What are you waiting for, hurry up and start making your own, you’re not having this one.”

Harry gave a discontent grumble but picked up a fresh sheet of parchment and a green colouring stick. Snape watched him for a bit before studying his own outline. There were several areas that had been done over and over again, leaving doubt to the correct passage and he started to notice bits that seemed very incorrect so he picked a fresh piece of paper and attempted it again.

As he worked, Snape glanced over once in awhile to check on the boy’s progress. He was drawing another blob; it was still hard to tell what it was.

“Perhaps it would be best if you drew and outlined all of the surrounding countries in and around the British Isles and then coloured England in red.” Harry ‘hummed’ a little but glanced at Snape’s paper and started to draw in the surrounding areas on his own map.

They worked for a bit more and Severus soon lost himself in drawing the notable rise and falls of the land and marking all the large towns and landmarks he knew. Harry occupied himself likewise, Snape was pleased to note, glancing down at the boy’s paper before stopping and taking a closer look.

“Why is there a dinosaur on yours?”

Harry stopped and bit his lip before looking up guiltily. “Because… dinosaurs….” It seemed as if the brat couldn’t come up with any reasonable explanation besides he liked them.

Snape gave a reprimanding sigh. “There are no dinosaurs in England . There are no live dinosaurs in the entire world, except for dragons and you know that those are not for Muggles to know about. Do it over.”

Harry scowled but Snape handed the boy another sheet. “Take more care on Scotland this time.”

After several tries, they ended up with something drawn by Harry that could pass for that part of the world. He hadn’t quite got the islands of Scotland correct, ending up with a lumpy area. Potter’s map barely resembled Snape’s own but if one squinted and applied a great deal of imagination it could be recognized as Britain .

Snape picked up the black coloring stick again and wrote ENGLAND in big, bold strikes under the country, which Harry had ended up colouring red like Snape had suggested, and ATLANTIC OCEAN over the blue scribbles.

“We wouldn’t want to make your classmates confused,” he said mildly, glancing at Harry.

“Alright, time for bed,” Hoppity said upon completion of their project and then the materials were gathered up and the boy guided upstairs with little protest.

---

Show and Tell

“-and it purrs and purrs until I pet it and get it to stop,”

Harry glanced back at the little girl in pigtails at the front of the classroom, holding an electronic kitten. He wasn’t bored, but purring kittens weren’t quite that interesting. Now, if it could get up and move and lick milk that would be a different story. He shifted a little to scratch an itch on his back.

Harry had showed his map earlier to the whole class and everyone had listened closely as he explained where England was and what it was like to travel across the ocean in a plane. The student teacher, their only teacher now, had brought out a globe and helped him show the class just where England was compared to where they were now.

Harry thought that his show and tell had been better than most of the students, even if he had just brought a self-drawn map. He couldn’t wait to tell Hoppity how much everyone had liked it. But not Snape.

“Thank you, Sharlene,” the teacher said and the girl went to put her toy kitten on the side table.

The bell rang and then it was time for lunch and recess. At first it was chaos but then the students settled down and ate their lunches. Harry looked around as he nibbled at his sandwich.

Soon it was recess and Harry was outside with his classmates, wandering around and wondering what he would do today. The itch on his back was back, and he scratched at it.

Benny had brought in a pet worm for show and tell and the little boy was across the playground talking to it as he walked back and forth. Harry knew that because he had seen Benny sneak it from the Show and Tell table before lunch and then watched as Benny had tried to feed it an apple with no success at lunch. But Harry wasn’t interested in a pet worm so instead he looked around for a game to join. Several children were playing tag but they ignored Harry as they ran around him, shrieking.

Harry stood behind a group of children playing a game with a ball, tossing it to each other in a box drawn on the ground. Maybe one of them would give him a turn?

He waited for awhile but none of them seemed to want to invite him to play so he started to wander around the playground again. A ball bounced past him and Harry turned to see a girl chasing it. He picked up to ball to give to her, hoping she’d say something but she just grabbed it and ran.

As Harry watched her return to her game he saw Bobby, that big bully Bobby, behind her, pushing Benny to the ground. Harry just reacted, running through several games towards them.

“Gerroff of him!” Harry yelled, running over and trying to push the much larger boy over.

Bobby just laughed and tried to force Benny’s clenched hand towards his mouth, it bounced off his glasses before nearing his mouth again. “Eat it.”

“Gerroff!” Harry yelled, grabbing Bobby’s arm and trying to pull it away from Benny’s face. That was Benny’s pet worm in his hand, the one that he all told them during show and tell was his best friend.

“WHAT IS THE MEANING OF THIS?!” An aide demanded as she came over and pulled both Harry and Bobby away.

“He was making him eat a worm!” Harry said before anyone could say anything.

“It was candy!” Bobby said.

“Slimey is not candy!” Benny yelled as he held out his hand for the aide to see the wriggling worm.

“It’s just the kind you like to eat!”

“That’s enough!” the aide snapped. “Benny are you alright?” He nodded. “Good. Now put that worm back where you found it. As for you Bobby,” she said, her tone getting harder, “I saw what you were up to; you’re coming with me to see the principal. I’m getting tired of your shenanigans…”

The two boys were left alone as the aide marched Bobby off presumably to the Principal’s.

“Thank you… Harry,” Benny said, a light shining in his eyes behind his large glasses. His face was messy, his eyes were damp and snot was running out of his nose. He rubbed an arm across his face, smearing the facial goo across it.

“It’s okay,” Harry said a little disgusted. He was done so he started back to wandering around the playground, hoping that someone would invite him in a game.

Benny followed him, sniffling all the while. “You were really great Harry!” he exclaimed. “You saved Slimey’s life, if he ever has any brothers I’ll name them all after you. Harry the first and Harry the second and Harry the… threed.”

Harry scratched behind his ear. “That’s okay. I’m sure one Harry is enough.”

“You were great! You’re my bestest friend now! For ever and ever and ever!”

While having friends were nice, having fans weren’t. Harry had quite enough of them in his other world. He tried to leave Benny behind, but the other boy stubbornly followed him, saying how great he was with repetitions of “You were great!”

He trailed him for the rest of recess and wouldn’t leave him alone for the rest of the day.

---

After school and after a wonderful soccer practice…

At the kitchen table, Harry mused about Benny and his hero praise. Maybe if he actually hadn’t had to deal with that so much, he might be okay with it and be Benny’s friend. He certainly would have taken any friend he could get when he was younger before Hogwarts. But someone who thought you were a hero didn’t make a good friend. They were a follower, and Harry didn’t want followers.

He scratched at a spot at his wrist and looked down, seeing a raised pink bump, noting it with interest.

So what should he do about Benny? Ignore him? Tell him to stop? That he wasn’t his friend? No, Harry couldn’t do that, He knew far too well what it was like to not have any friends.

“You know Harry,” Hoppity said from where she was snacking on some yogurt, leaning against the counter. “I was talking to some of the other moms at soccer practice today. They said that because it’s so hot out, a lot of kids can get sick. I think that you should start having more water…”

Harry scratched at another spot on the opposite elbow. This one really itched and Harry looked down, realizing with a sort of detached dread that he had little red bumps all over. He’d never had so many, except that one time he was left outside all night in the summer, and then the bumps had been so much smaller, tiny in comparison even though he had had a lot more of them.

“They said a liter a day… I don’t want you to feel sick or collapse on the field, that’d be awful…”

Had a large family of insects been snacking on him as he slept? Harry imagined large spidery ants crawling all over him, biting and sucking on him, taking all his blood until he had none left and he woke up dead like a vampire only one that wouldn’t burn up in the sun.

A little frightened, Harry did the thing any six year old would do. “Hoppity?”

“Yes Harry?” she asked, breaking up her musing about water and hydration.

“What are these?” he asked, holding out his arms so that she could see.

Hoppity gave one look at the multiple bumps all over his arms, glancing over his face and neck before giving an “Eek!” and dropping her spoon.

“What? What is it?” Harry asked desperately. Was it bad?

“You’re got the Splotches Harry!” She looked startled, blinking.

Harry looked down at his arms, they were looking rather splotchy with all the large irritated bumps. He scratched at his neck. “What are they?”

“Oh Harry,” Hoppity said remorsefully and Harry felt dread clutch in his gut. “I’m so sorry that it came to this.” Tears were in her eyes now. It must be bad.

“Am… am I going to die?”

Hoppity gave a look of happy disbelief and gave out a bark of laughter. “Die? No, Harry, Merlin no. You’ve got the Splotches!” She pulled him close and hugged the top of his head. “It happens when you don’t laugh enough, when you don’t show enough joy. I only know because my sister had it when she was a child. All you have to do to cure them is to laugh.”

“Cure what?” Snape asked as he came in to get his customary cup of tea in the afternoon.

“The Splotches.” Harry said mournfully.

“The Splotches? What are those?” Snape seemed very put out at never having heard the term before.

Hoppity spoke up, “They happen when you don’t express happiness enough when you should. My sister had them. All you have to do is make up all the laughing.”

Harry raised his arms helpfully so that Snape could see them and Snape glanced down at them before looking at both of them very closely, trying to tell if they were telling the truth. “They look like insect or plant bites to me.”

“Look at them!” Hoppity said, pulling Harry forward and up by an arm so that Snape had to. “Have you seen midget bites this big anywhere so far from an ocean? And there are no magical plants around here to bite him.” Snape seemed unable to disagree. “They can’t be bug bites. Besides, when’s the last time you saw Harry laugh, really laugh? It has to be The Splotches.”

Snape tried to think of the times he saw Harry laugh or giggle or even chortle. In the last couple of days he’d seen the boy frightened, quiet, frustrated, upset, angry, quiet, drugged, tired, crying… certainly stressed out at one time or another. Harry had only slightly giggled once, and had become sullen almost immediately afterwards. They quite fit the qualifications of constraining joy before the child had his fill, especially after such trying days.

“And you say the cure is laughter?”

“Yes. My parents had Grandpa Albus and Grandpa Alberforth come over for my sister when she had them. We never laughed so hard in our lives and she never got them again.”

“Are Splotches supposed to itch?” Snape asked upon seeing Harry scratch at several.

“A little, not a lot. Scratching won’t spread them if that’s what you’re concerned about. Only holding in more expressions of joy will create more bumps. They first appear quite suddenly and at once.”

“Alright, then make him laugh,” Snape commanded unhelpfully as he continued to make his tea.

Hoppity looked at Harry helplessly, but then he could tell that the wheels were starting to turn.

Suddenly, she made a face, tongue sticking out and eyes all skewed. Then she started to dance around, looking at Harry to see if it had any effect. It didn’t.

“Why did the goat cross the road?”

Harry thought a little but then looked up at her blankly.

“Because there were cans on the other side! Haha!” Hoppity fell over laughing. Both Snape and Harry gave her blank looks. “Oh, okay,” she said upon noticing that her joke had no effect.

Next she reached out and tried tickling Harry, but he squirmed away uncomfortable. “Come on, Harry, laugh.” But Harry didn’t feel like it. Hoppity tried another face, but it had no affect.

“Do you feel like laughing Harry?”

“No.”

“Not even a little bit?” Harry could only shake his head. “Ah, I’m rubbish at this,” she said balefully. “Severus, you have a go.”

“I am hardly a comedian,” Snape said scornfully.

“Yes but I’ve already tried. It’s your turn now.” No response. “How about a laughing potion then? I doubt that we’ll be able to succeed otherwise.”

Snape paused. “What are the complete symptoms of The Splotches?”

“You’ve never heard of them?”

“No. I haven’t.” Snape said shortly with ill-disguised irritation. Harry paid close attention, just what would happen to him if he wasn’t cured?

“Well I don’t really know all of them... I know that the bumps swell larger and larger… but if it’s not cured after that the person may be doomed to be unable to express joy or happiness ever again!”

“How awful.”

“It is!”

Harry imagined what it would be like if he wasn’t cured. “Congratulations Mr. Potter, on winning the Quidditch World cup! How do you feel knowing that you lead your team to their first victory in over a hundred years?” “Fine,” would be Harry’s reply. “Are you happy to have won it?” “I think so, I mean, I am.” “You certainly don’t seem to be.”

“Please cure me, Snape,” Harry begged.

Snape fingered the top of his cup. “I suppose that I could make a potion.”

“How about that laughing bubbly one?” Hoppity asked. “I think it had fairy dust and twinkle toes… counter stir twenty seven times… I can try to remember it for you.”

Snape’s hands tightened over his cup. “I can remember the ingredients and steps of making a potion without your help.”

Raising her hands in surrender, Hoppity stepped back. “Just let us know when it’ll be ready.”

“Approximately twenty minutes,” Snape said before tossing back the last of his tea and stalking from the room and leaving them behind.

They sat in silence for a while, Harry was glad that it didn’t turn out to be some of Aragog’s children snacking at him during the night.

“I’m sorry, Harry.”

Harry looked up at Hoppity curiously. What did she mean?

“I’m sorry that this hasn’t been fun for you, I mean obviously if you have got the Splotches, we’ve done a terrible job trying to get you to have fun…”

“But I have been having fun, honest!” Harry cried.

“But you must not have been expressing it enough…”

Harry looked down and studied the tips of his shoes. “I don’t think that that’s your fault…”

They sat there, the air conditioning machine came on again and Harry listened to it for awhile before becoming restless. Hoppity was looking rather depressed and Harry’s bumps were itching.

“Do we have any sweets?” Harry asked suddenly.

“Sure Harry!” Hoppity jumped up in a bustle of activity, it was like she had been waiting for something to do. She ruffled through the cabinets and closets, pulling out everything remotely sweet. “Oh look we’ve got all these ice lolly things too,” She said as she pulled them out of the ice box and gave them to Harry to look though. “You should probably have some water too,” she said as she got him a glass of it to sip.

Harry pulled out a blue ice lolly from the box and opened the plastic wrapping. The outside had a layer of clear ice flakes on it; Harry knew that it was really cold. He licked out to taste it and it was wonderful and blue and yummy. Hoppity took out a yellow one and ate it quietly.

Once in awhile, Harry would stick out his tongue to see what colour it was. At Hoppity’s prompting, he sipped some water.

That’s how Snape found them some time later, finishing their second ice pops since he left. Harry had his tongue out to see what color it was (purple) but quickly snapped it back in once he realized Snape was there.

The potions master entered the kitchen with great dignity. He had a corked, small bottle in his hand and there was a clothes pin on his overly large nose, clamping it shut.

Snape looked down at them above his clothes pinned nose and Harry couldn’t take it. He snorted into a complete fit of giggles. Hoppity was laughing behind her hand.

Snape looked at him irately, "Podder, I havn't obened the botion yet." The glare and censure only made it worse for Harry.

“Goo job- Sev’rus!” Hoppity gasped out. “Won’t- need- potion!”

Snape just fumed and set the potion on the table. “Id was nod indendional, I asdure you. I had dought dhat you knew thad the smell of the botions was whad caused complite hilaridy. Cerdainly I could nod have been able to sdore and dranspord it if I were incapacidaded with laughder!”

“Why- why is there- a clothes-!” Snort! “Pin on your nose?” Hoppity got out. She hadn’t exactly listened to anything Snape said, he just sounded too funny!

Snape gave a very angry sigh and uncapped the potion. A couple of small bubbles escaped and popped into the air. He set it under the already laughing Harry and soon Harry was lost laughing. He fell out of his chair and onto the floor. It had hurt, but not as much as it was funny. In fact, everything was funny. Snape’s clothes pin, the way Harry fell out of his chair, the table, the floor, Snape’s shoes… He laughed and laughed and laughed and laughed until he felt that he could laugh no more, but he was still laughing.

Snape reached down under the table and pulled Harry out by a leg. Harry rolled around, laughing but not quite as uncontrollably as before. Snape pulled out Harry arm from where it was wrapped around his midsection and studied it.

“Are dey subbosed do be gone yet?”

Laughter was his only response and Snape stood up and disappeared from Harry’s sight before coming back down and picking Harry back up to put him in his seat.

Harry’s eyes were wet from laughing so much and his stomach hurt. He pulled his legs up onto the chair to protect his sore middle. All that was left of mirth however were weak chuckles. Hoppity seemed still stricken, sitting on the floor and holding her stomach as he gasped and hawed.

“Smirkitd!!” Snape had his arms crossed and Harry was sure he could be tapping his foot in irritation.

A hand reached up to steady itself on the table, and then another and then Hoppity’s big messy head of red curls was over the top of the table. Harry noticed that her blue eyes behind her glasses were wet too, like his.

“Well?”

“Well, have they gone? You’re closer,” Hoppity said, wiping her eyes.

Snape, exasperated, pulled Harry’s arm out again, and then the other one. Clothes pin still attached, he studied the bumps closely. Harry tugged them back once he was done.

“Dhey are still dhere.”

They waited a little just to be sure, but the bumps did not change at all and they were still itchy.

“Stop scratching at them Harry,” Hoppity said.

Harry looked at her. “You’re scratching too!”

“No I’m- I am!” Hoppity looked down at her arm. “I’ve got the Splotches too!” she freaked.

Harry and Snape weren’t so sure; Hoppity expressed her joy all the time, so it couldn’t be so.

Snape took the clothes pin off and looked at Hoppity reproachfully. “They are not the Splotches. They must just be bug bites as I earlier surmised.”

“But… but no midget bites are that big!”

“Do not forget that we are in a new area and the insects will also be different.” Snape frowned. “A simple tincture should cure the itch.”

Snape disappeared to put a poultice together to stop the itching and get the poison to seep out.

Harry kicked out a leg and swung it back and forth from his chair. “Hoppity, I’m glad it’s not the Splotches.”

“Me too.”

“But see? I told you that I was having fun.”

Hoppity just smiled back at him and continued to scratch.

It didn’t take long at all for Snape to return this time. He was carrying two dishes, placing one in front of Hoppity before tending to Harry himself.

“Now rub some of this over each bite, then wait and rub the spot with a cloth. The poison causing the itch and raised area should seep out.”

Harry peered over the table into what was in the dish. It was a golden looking liquid. It smelled a little, of what Harry didn’t know, maybe a plant? He reached out with his fingers into the dish and then smeared the liquid over the itchiest bite, the one on his wrist, hoping that it would work quickly.

He watched the bite closely, curious to see it work. Since he was looking at it so carefully he hardly noticed the subtle changes, but then Snape was there pressing a white cloth over the bite and wiping something away and when it was gone the bite looked much smaller and certainly itched a whole lot less. There was a golden pink streak on the cloth now, he noticed.

“It may take several applications to get it all out,” Snape informed them, reaching out to smear the liquid over Harry’s arms, apparently he had decided that Harry was taking too long. “But even then, the bumps themselves won’t completely go away. You will have to wait until your body takes care of it.”

“How come you don’t have any bites?” Harry asked.

Snape said snidely, “I am sure that all the sugar you eat makes you taste better.”

Harry made a scowling face but then the cloth was back, rubbing with sure strokes at the golden and pinkish mess.

“Are there any others, Potter?”

“Yeah, at least one on my back,” Harry said lifting the side of his shirt up a bit, “And one on my neck and one behind my ear and one above my ankle…”

“They managed to get you good,” Hoppity murmured.

“Perhaps it would be best if you ceased your twilight adventures outdoors from now on.”

The liquid was smeared over the places Harry said, twice on the one on his back as it was much larger than all the others and actually had two other friends next to it.

Afterwards, Snape pushed the dish closer to the edge of the table. “Take this with you upstairs in case you find any more, you will want to take a shower now to get the last of it off.”

Harry nodded and got off his chair. He picked up the dish and carefully started to carry it out of the room.

“Severus, I’ve put it on twice but mine are still itching!” Hoppity complained, wiping at her bites with the cloth she had.

Snape silently and purposefully knocked the top of the laughing potion off, releasing bubbles into the air, and into Hoppity’s face.

Harry left the room with the sound of chortling ringing in his ears.