Harry finished five more detentions, and hit five more walls before the week was out, and he had lost more sleep than ever. Maybe he should have just kept his big mouth shut, he thought, because doing detentions for Snape was just making the vicious thoughts circling in his mind worse. His nightmares were getting worse, and he was making more trips to the boy's toilet each day to have up with his last meal. So far starving himself wasn't helping any, but eating sure did making the burning inside him worse.

He almost wished for dreams of him going up against Voldemort... his old nightmares were the stuff sweet dreams would be made of if he could just get himself to dream something different then reliving his horrible revelation at 4 Privet Drive earlier that summer.

Each night it was the same. He would be arguing with Dudley in the kitchen when Aunt Petunia would walk in and sneer at him, saying how unfortunate it was that Harry was so alike his father. And then Harry would grin and stick his chin up in the air. "Yep, good old dad," he would say proudly. "Good thing James and Lily are dead or else you'd be in for it Dudley." Dudley would roll his eyes and Petunia would scoff. "Right, JAMES and Lily. Even that boy would have been better than that broke, worthless little wretch that my freak sister had to go get knocked up by. I hated him, with his long black greasy hair and hooked nose... the children on our street always called him Snivellus..."

Harry had put a hole in the kitchen wall as Petunia had let this dreaded, precious piece of information slip, and he paid dearly for it later by Uncle Vernon's fist breaking his ribs, but even this was better than the feeling that had overtaken Harry since that day. The grimy, worthless dungeon bat who had lived to make Harry miserable for seven years was his father... the man who had abandoned Harry and his mother and left Harry to live life as a slave under a man with an iron fist. And still, there was nothing worse than knowing that his entire life had been a lie.

He had come back to Hogwarts determined to make his father as miserable as he felt. He would do everything right but just enough so that he couldn't get kicked out for his behavior, and he would refuse to be called by anything other than James. God how his twisted life ate at him day after day, until one day his body seemed to eat at itself without Harry's help.

The ground was crisp and the air was cool Monday morning as Harry puked behind a bush on his way back to the castle after Herbology. He had told his friends to go on ahead without him so that he could have some privacy as he got rid of his breakfast. Unfortunately he hadn't been the only one to stay behind, and he soon heard Draco speaking a short ways behind him as he stood up and wiped his mouth off.

"What's eating you Potter?" Draco asked, truly curious now. It seemed that Harry had done himself more harm than Draco ever could have tried to inflict on him.

Harry shook his head and moved off for the castle. "Get lost Malfoy."

"Yeah right Potter. Really, do you want to spend every night scrubbing the floor for the rest of your life, or do you just pretend to do detention so you can sneak around spying on people getting it on."

"I mean it Malfoy," Harry said, fist tightening, "get lost." Harry would have fought him, but he was feeling weak and sick, and Draco saw it.

"Go on then, fight me, but I'm going to pester you until you tell me."

"Why? Because you live to know that I'm miserable? Ok Malfoy, I'm miserable, happy? Now buzz off." Harry felt his stomach jerking and didn't want the blond boy to stand there and watch him throw up again.

"No, because I want to know what's turned the world's little loveable hero into me all of a sudden. People just don't see me as so moody now that you're around." He cocked a grin knowing that it was true, but dropped the smile when Harry ran for the next nearest bush and heaved loudly.

Draco stuck his tongue out and covered his mouth. People throwing up always made him have the urge to do it too.

"Seriously Potter, Hospital Wing. You're spreading germs everywhere."

"I'm not sick," Harry said, trying to get up off his knees, wiping his mouth on his sleeve again.

"Yeah, well that bush begs to differ."

Harry took in a deep breath of cold air, trying to calm himself. "What the hell's wrong with you Malfoy? Why can't you just leave me alone? I already told you I'm miserable, so be happy and leave me be."

"Don't be so dramatic Potter," Draco half spat. "Not everything revolves around you. You think you've got such a horrible little life with friends and the whole world idolizing you... it's not like you've got really difficult choices to make... your path is laid out for you."

Suddenly Harry was boiling again and greeted his old wonderful friend anger warmly. "Yeah, you think my life is so great?!" he spat, "how about finding out your whole life is a lie!? How about finding out that your dad is still alive and hates your guts!? How about finding out that you were dumped on a doorstep and abandoned to live as a house elf for 16 years!?" Still on his knees on the crisp grass, Harry was positively shaking now, wondering at all the private information he had just spewed out at Draco that he now had to use against him.

Draco was quiet, standing there contemplating all that he had been told. He had expected something different... what he wasn't sure, but something different. "Who is it then? Who's daddy dearest that hates you so bad you can never make up and live happily ever after?"

Harry was looking at the grass shaking his head. "Why don't you take a look at your lovely head of house then, and look at the similarities between us."

Draco's eyes widened. "Seriously?" He was coming closer to Harry now and was kneeling down next to him, bag dropped on the grass. "Are you joking?"

Harry shook his head again, hoping to dear God that Malfoy would keep his mouth shut about it.

"Why aren't you in Slytherin then? The hat would put you there if he was your dad!"

"It tried," Harry told him, "but I asked specifically not to be put there because you were there." Harry watched with some amount of satisfaction as Draco's mouth dropped open a little bit.

"Really?"

Harry nodded.

"Well, I mean... when did you find out about ol' Snape... I mean, obviously this summer because you were all happy before the holiday but..."

"My aunt let slip," Harry said, wishing desperately now that he had some control over his temper, because he did not want Draco knowing all of this and he felt like he was on thin ice telling him all of this.

"I mean, my dad told me once that Snape and your mom used to go together at school, but you look so much like a Potter that I never thought..." here Draco stopped and took in Harry's appearance again. "I guess you do have long jet black hair like he does, only yours is more messy."

Harry bit his lip, knowing he might as well just skip Transfiguration now because he was so late already.

"But seriously, you're so sick over this you're puking your guts up all the time? I heard people talking about how you're always running to the bathroom after each class."

Shrugging Harry said, "I can't stop. My stomach burns all the time and if I eat it's worse, and the thought of any food at all makes me have up with whatever I did eat."

"Well why didn't you go see Pomfrey? She can treat ulcers like, in two seconds!"

Harry frowned. An ulcer? He hadn't thought of that, but it made sense now. "How do you know about ulcers?"

"I had one last year," he said. "Pomfrey gave me some potion and it was fine for a couple days, and then I went back for some more until the bloody thing was healed."

"No, I don't want to go up there, because she'll start asking questions."

Draco frowned. "Does Snape know? I mean, because if he knows then you might as well let her ask questions."

Harry shrugged again. "I don't know if he does or not, but if he does then he really, really hates my guts." He ran his hand through his hair and suddenly shivered, realizing he didn't have his jacket and it was definitely cold outside.

Rubbing his hands quickly over his bare arms, Harry said, "Don't tell anybody... nobody would believe you anyway." He hoped the last bit would deter Draco from spouting his secret to the whole castle like a broke fire hydrant.

"No, they wouldn't. But I won't tell anybody. You're messed up enough already."

Draco and Harry stood up and didn't say anything all the way back to the castle. In the Entrance Hall Draco gave Harry one more appraising look, and then disappeared up the stairs, late to whatever class he had next. Harry headed for his common room, trying not to think about what had just happened. His life really was turning upside down if Snape was his father and he was telling his secrets to Draco Malfoy.

After dinner that night Draco caught up with Harry and pulled him into a darkened corridor on second floor.

"What?" Harry asked, fearing the worst. Had Draco already told people?

"I asked Snape for some potion to heal an ulcer, because he knew I had one last year, but he wouldn't give it to me unless I got Pomfrey to ok it. I would go ask her but she always runs a diagnostic spell before she gives you anything."

"Why'd you do that?" Harry asked.

"Are you kidding? I hated having that crater in my stomach. I don't care what questions she asked I was just glad I went to see her and got it over with. But you're so messed up you'd rather live with it then tell her, so I thought I'd help."

"But why," Harry asked again, confused. Draco had never done a nice thing for him ever. Harry wasn't sure that Draco would ever do anything nice for anyone ever.

Draco shrugged. "I dunno... maybe because you're the only one in this place as messed up as I am. I don't see other people walking around the place barfing all over every five minutes. And you told me... which means you didn't tell anybody else yet, so I reckon you'd rather not tell anybody else."

Harry bit his lip. "I didn't tell anybody else... I couldn't stand other people knowing."

Nodding, Draco said, "Yeah, sounds about right. I'll try Snape again tomorrow, and maybe he'll feel sorry enough for me to give it to me. It would only help for a couple of days, but anything's better than nothing."

Draco tried to move off, but Harry reached out to stop him, his other hand holding his own stomach. "You don't have to do that."

"Nope, but I reckon if the hat tried to put you in Slytherin it must be where you were meant to be, even if you did take a detour through Gryffindor." He pulled a face as if to show mock disgust, and then said hurriedly, "See ya," before slipping off into the darkness.

Harry's head was filled with odd musings and confusion at all that had happened. With Draco Malfoy being nice to him he wasn't really sure what to expect for the rest of the day. Did this mean Ron and Hermione would turn on him? Back in the common room Ron and Hermione were as nice as ever, but Harry had too much to think about to be able to concentrate on his homework, so he went to bed early.

* * *

Ron and Hermione gave Harry and Draco a strange dismayed look as Draco pulled Harry out of a throng of people the next day and whispered hurriedly to him, but Harry didn't notice.

"I asked again but I think he's suspicious. He gave me a weird look like he was trying to decide if I was lying or not."

"Did you tell him anything?" Harry asked worriedly, feeling his stomach burn worse as he did so.

Draco shook his head. "No, and I still didn't get it. But I will though. Just meet me tonight at six in the empty room next to the Charms room."

Harry nodded, and hurried to catch up with Ron and Hermione.

"What was that all about?" Ron asked suspiciously. Hermione glanced sideways to see how Harry reacted to the question.

"I don't want to talk about it," Harry said, and hoped that they would let it drop. They did for the moment, but Harry had a feeling that their patience was waning with him, and didn't know for how much longer it would last.

Forcing himself to eat something that night at dinner, because he'd hardly eaten at all in the past three days, Harry finished quickly and hurried off to the agreed meeting place. Draco was there and had a small bottle of silvery potion.

"It's only one dose, but it will be good for two days."

"Where-"

"The Hospital Wing. I had Crabbe create a distraction so I could sneak in and nick it from Pomfrey's stock. I couldn't take it from Snape because I'd already been asking about it and he would have known it was me who took it."

"Are you sure you're not trying to poison me?" Harry asked, trying to confirm that Draco was indeed in earnest about helping him.

"Come on, just drink it you halfwit. I went to the trouble of getting it for you. You're going to give me an ulcer just watching you have one."

With one last look at Draco, Harry popped the cork out of the bottle and downed the liquid in one swallow. Almost immediately he felt a cooling sensation in his stomach and a deep relief swept over him. Muscles that he hadn't realize had been tightened suddenly loosened up and he felt at ease and at peace.

"See, that's what I'm talking about," Draco said. "If I were you I'd just go see Pomfrey. I don't think I'll be able to nick anymore. And if you worry yourself too much over Snape the potion will wear off quicker."

"Well I can't very well not worry over it when I have detention with him every night."

"You need a way to unwind," Draco said knowingly.

"What, like at the end of a dark hall with a girl?" He half laughed, but Draco gave him a weak glare.

"No, and not funny. Don't tell people about my love life. I mean something more liquid. It won't help your ulcer any, but I've got some moonshine that Goyle snuck in at the beginning of the year that will help you forget for a little while."

Harry bit his lip. He'd never taken a drink before in his life, but the lure of forgetting was a strong one.

"I don't get out of detention until late."

"I'll find you," Draco said. "Just keep your mind clear until then." And then he hurried off again to get a bite before dinner ended.

Harry sat in the classroom and let the feeling of relief from his pain continue to wash over him. The relief was so wonderful that he had little trouble clearing his mind during his detention. He hardly thought at all about Snape until near the end of the detention when another Slytherin entered the office to tell Snape about some trouble he was having, and Harry again felt the ache of jealousy sweep over him. Why was it that every Slytherin got to have time with his father and talk about life, but he wasn't allowed even a moment? Oh, that's right, because the man hated his guts, and that would never change. Suddenly he was hating his father and his life, and himself all over again, and ten pm couldn't come quick enough. He nearly threw the toothbrush at his father before hurrying from the office. He hadn't gotten down two dungeon halls before Draco whistled to draw his attention, and then lead him into a hidden room behind a hidden wall. There was no furniture in the room, but there were two cups and a large, odd shaped bottle of liquor. And after that there was drinking and laughing and not being able to stand up.

"I'll just leave this here for whenever," Draco said. "We've got seven more bottles of this and Christmas will come soon enough, so no worries if you finish this one off. But I wouldn't want to be you when that potion wears off after you've been drinking."

Harry laughed and felt silly. "Yeah, wass at? Aw, I'll think about it later Draco. You're a good friend today though."

Draco shook his head. He could hold his liquor better and hadn't drank nearly as much as Harry. He knew better than to get caught stumbling down the halls drunk. Snape had taught him that lesson early on too.